Point Of View 2 [*Do not read until you've read the same chapter of ATW]

Chapter 133 My Everything

"Trisha... the light is green." I hear Evan but don't put my foot on the gas. I hear the beeping of cars, the pissed off people. I pay no attention to them as they all swerve around me. This has happened before.

"Trish."

The light turns red again. I stare at it. Hypnotized by it. How quickly the light changes from green, to yellow, to red. In that matter of seconds. 

In the matter of seconds.

Everything can change. People could die.  People have died.

"James..." My voice trails off softly while I ruin my makeup with my tears.

"What?" I can feel Evan's eyes on me. "Why don't we pull over."

But I just stare at the light.

"James. The light..." 

"Ok, hey Trisha. C'mon. Turn in over there." The bodyguard insists but I can't seem to think clearly.

****

"James. The light..." 

I screamed, but it was too late. By the time James noticed we went through the intersection, the impact of the crash had happened.

The SUV spins around before tipping, and the next thing I know, we are upside down. My hand flies up to my head from the impact of hitting the dashboard.

*****

I can hear the crunch of the two SUVs colliding. I can almost feel the drop in my stomach from being flipped upside down. The smell of gasoline and smoke fill my nose. I can see James.

He looks so peaceful. Like he's sleeping. He's finally sleeping after working so hard for so long. That's what he looks like. Just....sleeping.

"C'mon. You're ok." I hear Evan's voice again. "Sorry! Just go around us! Yeah whatever- fucking go around us loser!" 

Horns honk. People swear. 

"Let's go." 

"Huh?" I refocus my eyes. Evan is reaching around me to put the SUV in park. He unbuckles my seatbelt. Evan wraps his arms around me and pulls me out of the driver's seat. He walks me around to the passenger's seat and buckles me in. I lean forward and drop my head in my hands, realizing now what happened. Shit.

"I'm sorry." I muffle out an apology while breaking down into my hands.

"It's ok. You need to talk to someone though, Miss. Banks. I mean it."

I know this already. I've been putting it off. With everything going on with everyone around me and Nate and Richard and all that shit... Excuses excuses- I know...

Evan takes over and drives the rest of the way to the Avalon. I was trying hard to get over my fucking fear of the detox facility to go to visit Nate and wanted to have a one on one with Paul, who I've been avoiding since he broke up with me for Julia. But I wasn't thinking of the many intersections I'd have to go through to get to the Avalon.

I was doing fairly well driving the last few weeks. But I wasn't really driving far. Maybe from point A to point B here and there. Once we got to this busy intersection it just brought me right back to that fatal car accident. I can't seem to get past it and continue to relive that awful day over and over in my head. It's been months. Nate uses me as his fucking therapist. I used to do the same. But this is beyond Nate I think.

 I think.... this requires professional help.

*****

*James*