Wait, I Love A Thug?

Chapter Twenty Nine

Enjoy, please excuse any mistakes. 

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CJ P.O.V 

Since I have been back home, I haven't left my room once. I haven't looked or talk to Dre once. I've only said a few words to Jamie and Kendra. Once they found out I was back from that hell hole, they immediately came over and actually stayed for 3 whole days.

We talked, ate and watched some movies.  I told them somethings that happened when Corey had held me captive. 

The times we would go out, the kisses, the touching. I told them all about that. And instead of a "I'm so sorry CJ." I got a hug. And with the hug, I got a promise that they wouldn't tell the guys 'till I was ready. 

And that was exactly what I needed, 'cause what I really hate is a person telling me they were sorry for what happened to me.

I didn't leave my room unless I had to use the bathroom, but even when I did, I came right back to bed. 

It's been a week, since I've been doing this. 

I sighed and rolled over on my bed. When I opened my eyes, I saw the big teddy bear that Dre had got me for our anniversary. When I got back, I threw it across the room. I didn't want anything 'Dre' near me. 

There was a knock on my door and a minute later Andrew and Jaden walked in. 

I haven't talked to them much either. Except when they would bring me something to eat, I would just mutter a thank you, and then they would leave figuring out that I wasn't going to say anything else.  

"You good?" Andrew asked, leaning on the wall. I nodded. 

"You need anything?" Jaden asked this time, and I shook my head. I heard them both sigh, then Andrew's voice. 

"CJ, why aren't you talking to us? Did we do something?" This time I didn't answer, since I didn't know what the answer was. 

"CJ we wanted to tell you about the gang." Jaden started. Well why didn't you? "We couldn't though. You were only 14, the gang started when we were 15. You wouldn't've understood." 

"We only did it because we wanted to get away from Aunt Celine. She wasn't treating us right and we were worried about your safety." Andrew jumped in. 

For the first time in a few days I sat up. I brought my knees to my chest, and wrapped my arms around my legs. I rested my chin on my knees and looked at my brothers. 

"So the way to do that was becoming thugs?" I asked, my voice dry. They both looked shocked, they haven't heard my voice in a while. 

"It was the only way to get money fast so we could move out. We were only 15, we couldn't get jobs. People wouldn't give us a simple job like sweeping the floor at a barber shop." Jaden protested. 

"Didn't mean you guys had to sell drugs. You could've waited. We couldn't waited until you were old enough so we could move out." I told them 

"We had to do what we thought would be better for you. We did this for you. We created a gang for you. Everything was for you." Andrew sighed. 

"So it's my fault? It's my fault that you guys are in danger everyday?" I asked, my voice weak.

"No it's not your fault." Jaden shook his head. "We were in a fucked up situation and we had to do what was best for our younger sister."

"We didn't have our parents. So it was our responsibility to take care of you." As soon as Andrew finished that sentence, a sob escaped through my mouth. 

This talk did it. This talk had release all the emotions I've had for 4 weeks, a month. 

I was crying for the forced kisses, the touches that I felt, the body that was forced on mine, the abuse. 

I was crying for the fact that I've been lied to for the past two years, that even my own boyfriend or whatever he is, lied to me too. 

I felt the warmth of two people on me as I continued to cry. The same warmth I felt years ago when we were with our terrible aunt. The warmth I felt when I would get scared or had nightmares.

The warmth of the two people I couldn't live without. 

Dre P.O.V

"Jr, do not eat your food like that, it's not going anywhere." Mama told Jr. "I swear you're just like your father." She mumbled. I chuckled and wiped some food off of his chin. 

"Mama, stop being so hard on him. He's 3." 

"Mhm, and he's turning four in a five months." She said as she ate some of her salad. "When you were his age and you would pull that stuff, I knock some sense into you." 

I laughed. "Yeah Mama, I remember." I bit into my sub. 

"So how's your girlfriend?" Mama asked. I put my sub down and sighed. 

"She still ain't talking to me. She won't even look my way." 

"She just needs time, honey. She'll come around." 

"I hope. I wanna tell her about Jr. as soon as possible." I looked down at him. He was happily playing with and eating his food. 

"Dre, she was there for a few weeks, from what you've told me, so give her time to heal. We don't know what happened to her." 

"I know, but I just really miss her." 

"Patients Dre, patients." I nodded. 

"Maybe I should give her something." I suggested. Mama shook her head. 

"You can't win girls like her over with money and nice things, Dre." She protested. I rose my brow at her in confusion. "Is she the gold digging type?" 

"No." 

"Then you can't solve your problem with her by spending money." 

"Okay mama. But I need to talk to her." 

"Just wait for her come to you." 

"Is you guys talking about my new mommy?" Dre jumped, looking at us with his hopeful eyes. 

"Mommy?" Mama looked at me. I shrugged. 

"He has this idea that CJ is his mommy. But I told him it would take time before that actually happens, but he continues to call her his mommy." She turned her attention to Jr. 

"Yes honey, we are talking about your 'new mommy'. But you have to tell your fathers to get his act together so you can finally meet your new mommy, and so your mommy can meet grandma." She eyed me. 

"Mama, I have my act together-" 

"Get your act together daddy!" He yelled, his face scrunched up to show he was upset.

I sighed. "I have my act together Jr. I'm just waiting for your 'new mommy' to give me the okay." 

"Well tell her to hurry, daddy." 

"It's not the simple." I mumbled. I nodded anyway answering his request and he went back to coloring in the coloring book the restaurant gave us. 

"What if she don't want anything to do with Jr.?" I whispered to Mama. Mama rested her hand on mine. 

"She'll understand once you explain everything to her. She'll stand by you and help you raise Jr." 

"How do you know?" 

"Because she'll see how much you actually love her." She smiled. I looked at her, with a shocked expression. "Don't look at me like that. Mother's know everything."

"She doesn't love me back." I shook my head. 

"That may be true, but she eventually will." 

I stopped the conversation right there. I guess I'll just have to wait and hope. Hope that everything will be fine.

I looked down at Dre and smiled. That was my little man. And what I didn't want was for the both of us to get hurt.