𝘔𝘳𝘴. 𝘉𝘺 𝘊𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦

chapter 24

..

..

..

..

Me and shahneel reached home. We didn't gave any prior notice about our impromptu arrival so my mom was shocked. When she looked at me, she ran towards us and hugged me tightly. A moment later she pulled herself from me and she slowly ran her hand through my hair.

"what have you done to yourself? You know how scared i was when Ishan called shahneel yesterday and told her about your condition." she said and hugged me again.

"Maa woh... Jyo..."

"No.. Lets  talk about that Later. Ok. Both of you now go to your room.  Get fresh. I'll bring something to eat." She said.

I looked around for papa."Your papa Isn't home. He'll be back tommorow morning." She said and left for kitchen and me n shahneel leave for our respective bedrooms.

This is the first time I'm coming back Home after Daima's Demise. Before Every time i used to come home the first person i used to meet was my Daima. MY DAIMA.

Rather that going to my room, I turned to another room. IT WAS DAIMA'S ROOM. I entered in her room. It's still looks like before. Mom has kept this room pretty clean. I looked at her huge photo which was hanged to the wall and sat infort of it. My mind was completely blank. I was just staring at her photo. She have witnessed me in every phase of my Life. When I was a kid, when I started playing cricket,  when I had nothing and now when I have everything. She was always there. Without any expectations.

My wedding was her dream. Her last wish. I still remember her smile when she saw me and Jyotica getting married. Not just I caused everyone pain but I also broke my promise to Daima. I sat there for some minutes more in silent when someone opened the door of her bedroom. It was my Mom with a dinner plate in her hand.

"I was Looking for you for dinner but couldn't find you in your room so I thought you'd be here" she said and entered in the room. She sat beside me on the floor. After a moment of silence she said,

"You know shubman... You were very close with your daima, I can understand you're going through some emotional rollercoaster right now plus daima's absence added salt on your wound but beta I gave birth to you. All I'm trying to say is, I'm always here If you want to talk to anyone. Im always here to listen."

"Maa...... I ruined EVERYTHING"  another tear dropped on my cheek unknowingly.

"I don't know anything about her whereabouts. I'm looking for her for months. Her father was my Last hope maa. Now even that door closed too. I feel like I've lost everything. All i can do is to look for her till I die. It's like walking on a never ending road. And there is still no guarantee that she'll get back with me. She told shahneel that she wanted to go away as far as possible from me maa. She hates me now maa."

Maa wiped that tear off my face. She smiled faintly when she said,

"You know shubi, what you did was wrong and now you're trying to make things right, that's a great thing. But love isn't easy beta. How can you loose this battle so early, when its just a beginning and if there's Love then there's a Way. Remember what Daima used to say,

'When we can't do anything, we PRAY and when you pray for someone you offer them the greatest kind of Love.'

Praying gives you mental strength too and You still have us and your cricket in your life. I heard you got selected for World Cup right? Let's focus on that for now. This way your mind will be busy too. When are you leaving by the way?"

"Next week, I guess you're right maa. It's time for me to focus on my Game. My country needs me too."

She smiled "achha chal ab khana khaa le aur jaake aaram kar".

She fed me food and left from there.

..

..

..

..

Even after she left I had no energy to leave from Daima's room. I lost count of time but I sat there for hours. With a total blank mind. Gaze lost in zero. This won't do. I need to get myself together. I need to put my shit together. Not for me but for people who loves me. Mom was right. When we can't do anything, we pray....

I looked at my wristwatch it was 5 am in the morning. I stood up. Took a last look at Daima's photo and left for my bedroom. Took shower, put my mask and white handkerchief in my pocket and left for GURUDWARA.

The nearest Gurudwara from my house was 30 minutes away. It's winter season so it's still dark outside, sun hasn't up yet. I reached there, put a mask on and tied handkerchief around my forehead And went inside. It's still early so not alot of people are here, I took off my mask And sat on the floor. Devasted, tired and lost. I closed my eyes.

" He WAHEGURU, Today I'm not here to ask anything for me. Normally I only come here before my very Important matches. But today I'm not here to pray for me. You know everything. I admit I lost.

I SHUBMAN LAKHVINDAR GILL ACCEPT MY DEFEAT.

I have no hope left. I don't know which direction i should go. I'm all lost. But i also know I deserve this. Nor I'm here to ask for any forgiveness. I'm here for a person I love, for a women who taught me a real meaning of relations. I've caused her too much pain. Please keep Her Happy wherever she is. Keep her Safe, and let all of her wishes comes true. May she get everything that I wasn't able to give her. A Loving Husband, a happy marital Life.. I wish her all happiness in the world. I know she's not coming back to me now so I'll live rest of my Life with a satisfaction that, wherever she is alteast she is Happy.

Living my Life without her is my punishment and I accept that. So please keep her Happy. Please "

..

..

..

I let out a deep breath and opened my eyes. I sat there for some minutes more  and then stood up To leave.

When I was about to climbed in my car my phone beeped in my pocket. I took it out, it was a text from my manager Regarding upcoming WORLD CUP.

It said  'there was some changes in my schedule so we have to leave earlier than expected. We were leaving next week but now we have to leave immediately after Two days. He send me this massage along with A document.

.

.

.

I opened that Document.

It was with A Business class Flight ticket from 'INDIA to AUSTRALIA,' MELBOURNE.

suddenly a First ray of sunshine hit my face. Its like a ray of Hope. I turned and looked at Gurudwara again.

"WAHEGURU DA KHALSA,
WAHEGURU DI FATEH"

I said, and left from there.