Under The Crescent Veil

22. Dark pasts

I hate him. I hate him. I HATE HIM!

She didn't, but right in the moment she did.

Nyx felt betrayed. Silas tried hard for her to open up, to warm her ice-cold heart, to show that the world was indeed beautiful and less black and white as she was taught.

She began doubting herself, secretly imagining a life here where she could eat fresh fruit every morning, where free time was a given, and where people supported her instead of using her.

The picnic, kiss, and festival, were so incredibly beautiful giving her a sense of normalcy she didn't know she desperately wanted.

Her time at Silas' pack gave her a touch of old feelings, feelings that she developed when she was a child and her parents were still alive. A time she couldn't remember, but could still feel on her skin. It had left an imprint that became clearer the longer she was away from HPS.

But was erased by only a few words, why was I paired with you? The words stung Nyx greatly. Deep down her heart was already conquered by the big Alpha without her knowing, but his words made her retreat from the battle. How cowardly it was, she couldn't stop running away from him.

She didn't know where she wanted to go, not knowing if she wanted to go back to HPS. She didn't even know why she made the effort to steal documents from his office.

Nyx wanted to hurt him, but did she want to hurt him this much? That the lives of Nora, Andrew, Marlene, Lena, and even Clyde would be at stake?

She didn't understand this hurt.

Why did she feel so hurt?

What pained her?

Why did she doubt herself?

Why couldn't she just choose a side and stick to it?

Why was the world filled with only greys?

Why weren't her parents alive anymore?

Her head was a mess.

Nyx ran aimlessly through the forest, not knowing where to go or what to do. A small part of her wanted to go back. She wanted to tell Silas he had hurt her by his actions. That he needed to understand that pushing her aside while she was used as a scapegoat was wrong. That she needed to show her face. That if he wanted a trial that the compromise would be that she got to be present. That he needed to understand that even though she withstand the capture, it had deep down scared her and she needed some more of his comfort like he did before. That she didn't understand why he was so distant.

But then she would appear weak and vulnerable and seeing how Silas just treated her, he could no longer be trusted and forward she went.

Suddenly she saw something passing her in the corner of her eye, a couple of feet next to her on her right, making her turn left in a swift motion.

Nyx heard people behind her and... others? She couldn't make out what the other sounds were. All she knew was she had to try hard to escape this pack and once she had done that she had to reconsider her options.

Her attempt was futile though as she was thrown over by something foreign. She broke her fall with her arms holding around her head, rolling over a couple of times. Immediately she tried to run away again when a low growl stopped her.

Cautiously, Nyx turned around on her back and was face to face with a big brown wolf. Her eyes widened, her breath stuck in her throat. She had seen them from far away, but never this close.

When eye contact was made the wolf let out another low growl, making his teeth visible. Long canines that would go through her like butter. Nyx knew she was outnumbered in any way possible and showed surrender.