End Of Us

Chapter 14: Alex

A windy evening. I could see the trees swaying, almost as if they are vibing to the music I'm playing. I close my eyes and feel the breeze on my face as I start swaying, following the trees. I smile at myself, enjoying the moment as it slowly fades away, reminding me the conversation with my dad. It's been 2 day's since then. I should really decide if I want to go back or stay here.

If I leave my job and go back, I won't have to continue the contractual relationship with Jay anymore. I'm falling in love with him again and I'll just end up hurting both of us again. It's not like I'll be jobless if I go back to Japan. It'll be pretty easy to get a job there and with dad's recommendations, it'll be easier.

Why is it so hard to realize what I really want? I even talked to Lily and she wanted me to listen to my heart. I haven't talked to Jay about this. I don't even know how he will react to this. He might care or not care at all. I don't think I will like it if he doesn't care at all. Overthinking is gonna be the death of me.

I go back inside leaving the breeze behind. Taking a cup, I pour the coffee I made, in it, taking a sip to lighten up my mood and get rid of the stress. A notification pops up on my screen. It was a news headline.

"Famous Author Jay Miller and Famous Actress Rena Smith seen together" is what the headlines said. I put the phone away with no reaction. I can feel my heart sinking but it's for the best. If he found someone else, it's good for the both of us. He might not know but he already got his revenge.

Trying to avoid all these, I put on a song to clear my mind. 'Wishes' by Carter Ryan starts playing as I start humming to it.

(Play the song on the first page)

I wish I had another five more minutes

I wish I had the words to say

I know it probably would've made no difference

But I would've begged for you to stay

I look back to all those things I ever did. I was seriously in love with Jay after him. Was he the reason why I did that to Jay, Trev and everyone else? No. He can't be the reason because it's something I chose to do myself. I wish he was alive. I wish I never had to be the person I am today. What was I doing? Why did I change to a person he hated? He loved me for my innocence, my purity, my kindness.

I hate the way you make me feel this hollow

Even though it's not your fault

Losin' you is a pill I still can't swallow

So, I still wait for you to call

I look for his contact in my phone. It's saved as "Alex", my first love. He is far away, somewhere I can't reach. Letting go is hard and I thought I finally moved on.

"Wherever you are Alex, I hope you can forgive me" I let these words escape my lips as I dozed off while listening to the song.

I'm blowing out the candles, talking to the stars

Don't know how to handle not knowing where you are

Feel like something's missing, missing, yeah

Using all my wishes, wishes, yeah

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I find myself in an unfamiliar, empty room. I feel like I've been here before.

"It's not your fault Hana" a familiar voice speaks behind me. Hearing that voice, my throat becomes dry and my eyes softens. I turn around to see Alex, his tall figure standing in front of me. I quickly run towards him and hug him tightly "I missed you".

He runs his fingers through my hair "Stop blaming yourself for my death". I stop hugging him and look up at him directly , making eye contact. Right... he is dead. I pull away from him. "How are you here?" I inquire. "You called me" He replied.

His words made me stand still at my place. Did I desire to see him? Is it my subconscious? This doesn't feel real but I hope it was.

"It's not real" Alex came closer, "just a dream". "I'm sorry" I look away. "For becoming the Hana I don't know?" I was taken aback by his words but I had no words to contradict that.

"You were the kindest soul, Hana. You were soft and pretty just like your name, flower." He sounds disappointed.

My name means flower. Alex always compared me to a flower to tell me that I'm prettier than a flower. He always called my name with softness in his voice, the same softness Jay has while calling my name.

"I guess, this flower had thorns" I looked away again trying not to face Alex.

He slowly walks up to me as my gaze shifts towards him. He is standing in front of me. He leans down and whispers "Flowers with thorns are the prettiest".

My eyes grew wider upon hearing that. He never fails to amaze me.

"It's time for me to leave. Don't blame yourself anymore. Take care, Hana" He smiles as he slowly fades away.

"ALEX!" I open my eyes and find myself on my bed with wet eyes. Was I crying? Everything he said keeps ringing in my ear. "Don't blame yourself anymore" I repeat his words as I find tears flowing out of my brown eyes.

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I'm driving to Jay's house. I really need to tell him my decision and my parents too. I won't run away anymore, I'll face this.

Author's Note:-

Are you all enjoying the story so far?

I've been writing more than one chapter. It's taking time to come up with events.

Hana is a depressed character who's trying to get her life together so it's hard to put events in her life.

All my characters are based on reality. They don't exist in real life but they think and act rationally and make the same mistakes like we do. They aren't the picture perfect people. They have flaws and I hope y'all can accept that.

Keep reading!!!

This chapter contains 1062 words.