Secrets and Struggles

20

They spent the rest of their time in the chalet enjoying each others company. Caitlyn couldn't remember the last time she had felt this happy. Lando had shown her what it was like to have an important person in her life and she had found herself opening up to him about everything. She explained the terrible dynamic with her mum, how she didn't have any other family because of her mums wild antics. She had ran away from home at 17, gotten pregnant at 20 and spent the rest of her adulthood acting like a teenager, with a new man every week. Caitlyn had never been a priority in her life and sometimes she even questioned herself on why her mum hadn't terminated the pregnancy if she really didn't want her. 

Lando listened carefully to every word she said. He felt sad for her, he couldn't imagine living such a lonely life. His family were incredibly close and supported each other through everything. He also felt somewhat proud of Caitlyn though. She was clever but naïve, brave but gentle at the same time and had gotten herself through school, college and was now out travelling all on her own. He wasn't sure he would have been strong enough to do that. He felt uncomfortable talking about his upbringing but she was genuinely interested in him. Again, a new experience for him. Most girls he met, knew everything about him thanks to social media and were only after one thing. The more time spent together, the more they fell for each other although neither said it out loud. Both frightened of the consequences of admitting it. 

It was now time to move on the the track for the race and Lando had arranged with his team that Caitlyn could stay in the hotel with him. Charlotte, his PR, was shocked at his request. He never had girls stay with him but she could see the way his face lit up when he mentioned Caitlyn's name. 

L- So today is just media day, you can stay at the hotel and relax if you want.

C- That would be great if you don't mind? I want to get more of my travel blog written and published

L- Of course. I will see you later this afternoon.

He gave her a soft kiss on the cheek and left the room. Caitlyn looked around the huge room and took in everything that had happened over the last few days. She never wanted to wake up from this dream. She phoned Michelle to check in and fill her in on all the gossip. Even saying it all out loud didn't feel real. But something felt off. 

C- Miche, what's going on? I can tell something is wrong

M- I don't want you to worry Caitlyn but I saw your mum the other day. She looked in a bad way. And when she noticed me, she hurried off in the other direction.

C- Really? that's odd. I haven't heard from her since before I left, she hasn't responded to any of my messages either. She has probably been dumped from the latest toy boy.

M- Yeah maybe. I'll try to pop round to the house and check everything is okay.

C- Thanks babe. Love you

M- Love you too. Keep me updated with lover boy

Caitlyn thought it was a bit weird about her mum but there was always man drama with her. She spent the rest of the afternoon writing some blog stuff about the chalet and skiing before publishing it all. It was nearly 6pm and Lando still hadn't returned so she took the opportunity to run a bath and relax, writing in her notebook. After a while, she ordered some room service and got in to bed. She tried to stay awake for him but as the night went on, she drifted into sleep. Around 1am she heard someone swiping at the door and unsuccessfully getting it open. She huffed as she threw the covers off and opened the door to see a drunk Lando lying on the floor in the hotel corridor. Was he for real? She sat in the hotel room all day and night waiting for him and he was out getting drunk. Not to mention, he was going to be driving in free practice the next day. With a lot of effort, she dragged him into the bathroom. She took his hoodie and jeans off and placed a pillow and blanket beside the toilet. She supposed he would be needing to stay in there. 

She was woken the next morning by the sound of Lando's alarm. She kept her eyes shut as the bathroom door opened, the bathroom light illuminating the bedroom. She was beyond angry at him but also at herself because realistically there wasn't anything official between them so he didn't have to check in with her after going out. He grabbed some things out of his suitcase and returned to the bathroom before she heard the shower going on. Caitlyn took this opportunity to get up and dressed, still wrestling with her confusing emotions. She made a coffee and was reading one of her poetry books when he finally appeared in the room.

L- Morning....

C- ......

L- erm...so I am sorry about last night. It was one of the mechanics birthdays and things got a bit out of hand. I guess I should thank you for the pillow and blanket in the bathroom as well. (he laughed slightly, clearly not knowing what to do about the tension)

C- Its fine Lando. You don't have to explain anything to me. We're just friends right?

L- Yeah, sure. Anyways, I better meet Jon to head to the track. Your pass for the whole weekend is on the side. Its completely up to you if you want to come though.

C- I will definitely come tomorrow and Sunday but I was going to explore the town a bit today. If that's okay?

L- Of course love. Text me if you need anything okay?

Just like the previous night, he left with giving her a kiss on the cheek and she stood frozen to the stop as he walked out of the room. And all the confusing emotions were back again!