I did not think I was going to survive the next couple of years because of my health problems, but I still believe I am unhealthy, and I am to blame for that, somewhat.
So, even though I have all these mental illnesses, my physical health has become worse. I try, and I try to keep ahead of it, but I feel the second I make an inch, it pulls me back further.
I have a thyroid tumor, and the way I got this tumor was because of trauma; the little snit bit you guys read before this chapter when I was being abused is when my tumor became a problem, all because of one person that did this to me, my health probably wouldn't be such a problem if he didn't choke me the way he did, but unfortunately, it happened, and now I am dealing with it all.
Before him, I was always drinking water constantly, and I had this tick where If a bottle of water is left to sit for a while, I will not touch it; I will get a new water bottle; in the back of my mind, I think there is dust in it that grows, but dust is everywhere so I don't know why I am like this, but I drink water constantly even though I have a thyroid issue, I also have anemia along with diabetes, that is why water is my best friend now because I am always somehow needing water.
The cells in my body are not making enough to keep me healthy, and I do have a feeling I will die in the next couple of years; whether people like it or not, I just hope I can make it to my son's 18th birthday.
Cells and water are a weird combination; our body is mainly made up of water, but somehow, we always need it; my white blood count is always so high because of constant infections in my body that won't go away, and when the doctors try to keep them away, they always come back, because I am easy to be hurt, to be bruised, or to even to pass. I am a fragile girl. And I hate it.
I am fragile, but I am also fierce, I just can't do things like I used to.
I have gained weight because of this problem, and when I try to maintain it, it comes back worse. My body is a temple, but it is so fragile it's easy to break, and I am scared. I do not want to die because of this, and I don't want to go out of this world without a fight. I am just too strong-willed.
But somehow, I always need water. Water to survive. What a way to live, huh?
ESTÀS LLEGINT
The Thoughts Of Amber
Relat curtThis book is not just about me but the life that I lived and the things that I've seen and done it was never about making sure I was the greatest, I want the story to be told from my own perspective, my own opinion, and most likely to give advice to...
