Capturing the Crown

Chapter 37- The Reunited

I stare at the woman in front of me in absolute incredulity. I am filled with many ambivalent thoughts about her. Part of me refuses to believe what's happening. Another part of me thinks I'm in a such a stage of  incapable grief and melancholy that I've become unable to tell the difference between my wanted fantasies and reality. That maybe I'm just remembering the glimpses of her face and that she isn't real. Her voice catches me out of my reverie as she calls for me, "Atlas?" I don't say anything. I can't. Words can't seem to form against my tongue. She says, "Please. I need you to say something." My legs shake beneath me. My knees give out and I fall to the floor where she is kneeling in front of me. Her face looks like she wants to say something but can't think of what to say. Her hands lie hesitantly in her lap as if she wants to move them but doesn't know where to place them. Finally after what seems like forever, I say to her, my voice hoarse and raw with so many mixed emotions, "I-I-thought you died." She replies, deep regret in her voice "I'm so sorry, Atlas. I should have-" A hint of anger sparks inside of me and I exclaim, "You knew. You had to. I broke my heart out in front of you and you weren't even dying." My voice breaks as I yell at her, wanting to say so many accusatory things against her, "I went through so much watching you die. My heart was shattering into a million pieces and you weren't even dead."  Everything around me is blurred now. I shout, pointing at her  "You have no idea the unbearable agony you've caused me, Astrid." I stand up to collect myself and she rises from her kneeled position and reaches for my wrist. I break loose of her hold and I tell her, trying to remain calm," Please don't make this harder for me. I need to think. Please don't follow me." And with that, I turn and walk away from the love of my life.