mark on my heart | Mark Sloan

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Everett Dacre Sloan became an official person just 5 weeks after his birth. While Bonnie put Marks name on the birth certificate, they wouldn't allow it. He needed to sign his own paperwork as she signed hers, stating she is the biological mother of Rett. And, of course, Mark can't do that. Maybe not ever.

Its really hitting her this week. She handled the first weeks, the ones she thought would be harder, with a whole lot of courage and front. She visited Mark everyday still, almost for the entire day sometimes. She'd take care of Rett mostly by herself, cater to visitors, speak with her therapist. This week? God, its hitting her hard.

With it nearing the 2 month mark of the accident, a lot is happening. Legal things first off. Callie second off. And a whole bunch of medical tests to top it all off. Callie is fighting Bonnie for medical control over Mark; Bonnie wants extreme measures while Callie does not. She wants to turn Mark off with the claims 'it's what he'd want'.

Tough, it's not her choice. And it never will be. Callie's argument is that she has a child with Mark that is older than Bonnie's and this means he knows her more. She's also claiming Bonnie isn't in a fit state to make these judgements - that was the final straw for Bon and Callie is lucky her heart is still beating.

"Knock knock."

Bonnie curls up more. "Defeats the point when you say it." She mumbles.

Meredith smiles small and comes over, sitting on the edge of the bed. "I'm sorry." She says without a hint of regret. "We have to be at the hospital soon. It's time for you to get up."

"If I'm not there, things will still happen." Bonnie mumbles from beneath the mess of covers.

"True but you'd be letting Callie win. And she'd absolutely go straight to her lawyer." Mer states.

Bonnie pushes the covers down a little. "I still want her dead." She says, deadpan.

"I know you do." Mer shrugs small. "That's a valid feeling - just don't act on it because how will she see you beat her and prove her wrong?"

"What-" Bonnie pauses. Meredith raises a brow and waits, Bonnie sighing and eventually finishing her thought. "What if my point is never proven? What if I'm putting Mark through all of this for- for nothing?" She whispers the last part.

Meredith sighs small. "We know what can happen or should happen. Sometimes we know what will happen. With Mark's case...." she hesitates, "we have no idea what will happen. His body is almost well, his brain activity is almost perfect and he's breathing for himself. All sighs show he will wake up. But... we don't know when."

"Or if he will." Bonnie finishes in a monotonous voice.

"But we won't ever know if he's not here." Derek says sternly. "Come on, Bonnie. Don't give up now."

Bonnie sits up with a huff. "I'm not giving up. Can't I pause? Take a breather?"

"You can but not when Callie is waiting for you to mess up." Derek says, sifting through her closet with his good hand. "Here." He throws a dress on the bed.

"How do I get my boobs out of this, dumbass?" She tuts and gets up, pushing him aside.

He smirks to himself and winks at Mer. "Rett and I will be waiting."

She huffs and slams the door behind him, Mer still on the room with her. "Your husband is an ass."

"The biggest." Meredith agrees with a hum.

-

Bonnie pauses to take a few deep breaths, staring at the door to Mark's room. How can she keep doing this? What strength does she have left? Whatever there is manages to wiggle to the surface and she enters backwards, her back pushing the door open as she pulls the stroller in with her. She puts the brakes on and tucks her hair back as she examines Mark.