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"Is this not counterproductive?"

Henson smiles as she stands by the coffee cart in her coat and scarf. "Maybe to some." She hands Bonnie her coffee. "But I think it counts as exposure therapy."

Bonnie sighs. "Exposure. Sure." She mutters.

"You did the whole getting inside the hospital last week. This week, we are going to do it slower. We will walk, talk, drink out coffees - let your body familiarise itself with the environment." Henson explains.

"My body knows the environment, it's worked in it for 10 years." Bon rolls her eyes small.

"Yes but not since your diagnosis. Not since your PTSD trigger happened. You were shot at in that building." She nods at the hospital. "That is pretty traumatising. That event triggered a catastrophic diagnosis which left you in treatment for almost 6 months- none of that is easy. Not one aspect is, but they all happened simultaneously for you."

Bonnie chews those words slowly. "It's just a building."

"And that mentality will help. Along with slow exposure." She smirks. "You want to get back to nursing, no?"

"Yes. No. Maybe." Bonnie sighs. "It's hard to say. I feel like that's still me, that's who I am still. But... kinda not. I'm not the same so will I still enjoy the same job?" She wonders.

"All you can do is try. You can't determine for sure if it isn't the thing for you unless you get yourself back to it. If it isn't for you anymore then you can move one. Have you explored what you'd do if you weren't a nurse?"

Bonnie chews her cheek. "Medicine was always it. I originally intended on going the army route with Dac but obviously that didn't work." She shrugs. "I never got further than thinking of nursing."

"What are things you're good at?"

"Nursing."

Henson laughs. "I know that but there is a lot more to Bonnie Teller than nursing. Come on."

Bonnie blows air from her cheeks with a sigh. "Um I always liked the thought of education... or I don't know, maybe being a firefighter."

"Grueling work, being a firefighter. Met a few of those through my office." She notes. "But you'd be good at it - it's evident you have the courage."

She smiles small. "Yeah... just doesn't feel right. Nursing does."

"Then that's a good sign. You subconsciously know you're meant to go back and we will pull that into the conscious."

They walk for the entire hour and a half, making it around the hospital several times. Mark is waiting by the entrance as Bonnie and Doctor Henson part; he smiles as she comes over. "Hi."

She smiles back and hugs him tight. "Hi. Missed you."

He kisses her head. "I missed you too. You hungry? I was thinking we can go to Chipotle-"

"Why don't we try the cafeteria?" She says hesitantly - never had a bad experience there, should be good right?

Mark tries to hide his proud smile. "Uh sure. Yeah, come on." He takes her hand and kisses it. "I'm proud of you."

Bonnie shrugs. "It's nothing. Not had anything bad happen in the cafeteria, huh." She smiles small as she walks beside him. "I think I'll be okay. Its Thursday, that means it's burger day - right?"

"Always burger Thursdays." He nods smiling.

Bonnie smiles and let's him lead the way. Mark tries to avoid any obvious route through the hospital that might trigger her; she stays relatively quiet, reserved. Just grips his hand and follows.

mark on my heart | Mark SloanWhere stories live. Discover now