mark on my heart | Mark Sloan

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Mark and Bonnie sit in silence, opposite the empty desk stacked with files and photos and a name plate for 'Dr. Granger'. He is meant to be one of the top fertility experts in the country and they're fortunate enough to be in the same city as him.

"Apologies I'm late, so sorry, I am here." He announces as he rushes in; he's tall, taller than Mark and probably about the same age, with brown hair and very little grey in it. "Mark and Bonnie?" He sits down, flustered.

"Mark Sloan." Mark extends a hand.

The doc shakes it. "Plastic surgeon, right?"

Mark smirks. "Just a hobby." He jokes.

"And you must be Bonnie." He holds his hand out and she timidly shakes it. "I was reading over your file this morning but I'd rather hear it from you." He states, sitting back. "Can you tell me of your fertility journey so far?"

Bonnie takes a deep breath and exhales slowly; Mark grasps her hand. She explains the issues. 5 miscarriages, early in the first trimester each time. He nods along as she talks. "We've been openly trying since Sofia hit 4 months and nothings happening."

"That's your other daughter? Not biologically Bonnie's." He asks as he recalls information.

Mark nods. "My best friend and I, we share a daughter. She's almost 10 months now."

"Okay." He nods. "Let's start with the basics. I want to take bloods now, Bonnie, and arrange some scans. I want bloods on the first day of your next cycle and then in your fertile window. Mark, we'll need a sample from you."

Mark chokes on air but quickly clears his throat. "S-sure yep okay."

Bonnie rolls her eyes gently. "You get to feel good through this, buddy."

"I'll make you feel good don't worry." He smirks.

She hits him as she blushes.

Doctor Granger smiles. "If we say we book in again for a months time, we should have those results and I can begin to form a plan for you. I cant promise it is going to be easy... and I can't promise it will work at all. Whether it is IVF, IUI or something different, we will figure out how to get you a baby."

They soon bid farewell and neither speak as they head to the car. Its almost 20 minutes before one of them speaks up.

"This could be hard." Bonnie whispers, picking at the nail beds. "Long. Exhausting. Expensive."

"But it will be worth it all." Mark glances over. "You... you do want this don't you?"

"Absolutely." Bonnie quickly says, looking at him. "I just don't want to let you down again."

Mark takes her hand and kisses it. "I am under no illusion that we work hard for our life. You haven't let me down not ever and the fact you think that makes me mad. Any time you feel you let me down? You were scared. As for this, we know what the chances are. What could happen. And we discussed this - it doesn't matter. We try it no more than 3 times and be done."

Bonnie takes a deep breath and nods. 3 more losses and they give up. Got it. Okay.

Mark eventually parks up outside their house; in the day light, the dark blue paint makes the white accents brighter. They've only lived here 3 weeks but Bonnie can tell this is their forever home. She is never leaving it. She throws her bag on the kitchen island and kicks her shoes off, leaning her head back for a moment. Of course Mark headed straight to his office; he shuts away when he's emotional or anxious.

Bonnie grabs her phone and docks it, flicking on the Wicked soundtrack - the ups and downs of a fictional story are sure to get her emotions straight. She begins to clean in preparation for the arrival of her family. She's nervous about that now, more so than the tests she's racing. She hasn't seen her family since... since she lost her mind. Before that even.