FOOLISHLY IN LOVE WITH YOU

𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐲 𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 (𝟑𝟖)

OLIVER'S POV

Pain

physical pain? no

the pain that heart carries seems to weight more than the physical pain, a pain that clings to my heart, its a relentless ache an exquisite agony that resonates deep within my soul

I experienced an overwhelming sensation, as if the rhythmic pulse of my heart had suddenly stopped, and a dizziness enveloped me in disbelief upon hearing Gilbert's words. He remained before me, his head bowed, avoiding my searching gaze.

I desperately attempted to find the meaning behind his utterance, my trembling hands finding solace in the firm grip of my office table. In silence, I implored him, begged him to declare that this cruel revelation was nothing but a falsehood.

His words ring in my head causing something stab inside my heart, deeply

'Sir.. your mother, she isn't breathing I am sorry"

Silence echoes loud in the room the sound of clock ticking could be heard along with the harsh breaths of mine

My mind stays blank while my body stays rigid fingers tightening around the table knuckles going white

I stand there breathing yet not breathing

And then guilt starts taking over my body as the all the words I had ignored keeps rushing back

All the things father had said that I ignored and tried my best not to let my mind wander there

'You'll kill your mother yourself one day!'

'Do you really think she'll stay alive if you keep her with you!?'

'The day's not far when she'll die! And you'll stand there regretting your every single decision'

I fall down on my knees suddenly not being able to support my weight and the unconsciousness feeling that embraced me
heart pumping faster adrenaline rush in my veins making everything go dizzy

I felt hands come to support on my shoulder, I look up at Gilbert his eyes widen as he tried to make me stand up I blink slowly his lips moving I couldn't hear anything other than the words that replayed itself in my mind

-

What is life?

What is the life for a person who have lost his mother? Whose heart only beats because his mother was alive I find myself going in denial not accepting this truth

Gilbert enters my room with his head low still not meeting my gaze "Sir, Mr Mike Knightly had contacted me just now he'll be landing at night he asked to extend the funeral on tomorrow"

My jaw ticks as I glare at the glass in my hands swirling the rum in it gulping it down burning feeling ran down my throat satisfying me I grabbed the bottle opening the lid and pouring some more

I lazily glance up at gilbert who still stood there I raised my eyebrows silently

He cleared his throats turning to leave

"Gilbert" my voice groggy and deeper than it is

He stops turning around "Yes sir?" he answers

I stand up from my couch lying down the glass tucking my hands inside my pocket as I stare at him "Leave. and don't come back" I say quietly

He could feel my anger boiling inside me yet he stills questions "I can't sir It is my job-"

"I said LEAVE!" My voice boomed in my room "Whoever is in my house at the moment I want them all to leave, Am I clear?" I ordered loudly not being able to control the rage suddenly

He nods "Okay sir, do the maids also-?" I cut him off

"I said Every.One"

I hated myself to come out this harsh on Gilbert he's been nothing but a great helper to me, I shut my mouth not saying anything more hurtful and turn around signalling him to leave

I heard soft close of the door I closed my eyes tilting my head up tears ran down my eye with my eyes closed

I steady myself and walk towards the bottle bringing it to my lips and chugging it down not bothering to feel the burning in my throat it is nothing compares to the burning in my heart

My tears mix with the taste of rum I bring down the bottle from my lips glaring ahead with blurry eyes

I threw the bottle away it broke causing the rum to fall on my floor, my chest heaves as I go mad, wild looking around the room to break something

I punched the tv in bewilderment again and again tiny pieces of glass got inside my knuckles I held the tv with both of my hand and remove it with my hands throwing it on the floor

I screamed loudly gripping the roots of my hair tears keep running down my eyes making everything hard "why why why" I mumble these words in my breathe

I opened my drawer taking out the sleeping pills that I took sometimes when I couldn't sleep properly

Taking out a bunch of them I pop them in my mouth chugging it down with the little rum that was left in the glass

My legs gave out causing me to fall down beside my bed, I spread out my legs keeping my forearm on it holding my head I shake my head softly as more tears pool from my eyes "I failed... I failed in saving you Mama.. I am so sorry" my hands shiver as I look down at the bleeding knuckles

I absentmindedly walk towards the bathroom looking at myself in the mirror there was a light cut on my forehead my eyes bloodshot red and empty my face pale as if the soul was sucked out of me

My eyes trail towards the ring on my finger that mama gave me when I was younger to others it may not be something big but to me it was more than anything, it always helped me with my anxiety, panic attacks I dealt with. It made me think that mama was there but it doesn't seem to help now

•

Vote🫶🏻

Short chapter Ik! But this one is from oliver's pov

he felt immensely hurt the chapter is not thoroughly described but it tells about the pain he is dealing with