Obey Me

Where am I?

Diavolo: "Lucifer."

Lucifer: "Yes, Diavolo?"

Diavolo: "Did you choose the last exchange student?"

Lucifer: "No, but a kid signed up?"

Diavolo: "A child?"

Lucifer: "No, the parents did."

Diavolo: "Oooo! Choose the kid!"

Lucifer: "Why?"

Diavolo: "I want a child!"

Lucifer: "Why?"

Diavolo: I can dress them up in cute outfits! Set up playdates!

Lucifer: "Diavolo."

Diavolo: Take them out to eat. Give them all the attention they want. Ooo! I can give them a big room!

Lucifer: "Diavolo!"

Diavolo: "Huh?"

Lucifer: "Why?"

Diavolo: "Personal reasons."

Barbatos: "Are you sure it isn't because you want a child?"

Diavolo: *Trailing off* "Noooooo?"

Lucifer raises an eyebrow.

Diavolo: "Yes."

Lucifer: "If we were to accept the child, where would they be staying?"

Diavolo: "House of Levitation. Until I can get Barbatos to let me have the child."

Barbatos: "You cannot keep a child!"

Lucifer: "Okay..."

~Later~

Y/n: "Huh? Where am I?"

Y/n is in a place that looks kinda like a courtroom. Several individuals are watching him.

Diavolo: "Welcome to the Devildom!"

Y/n: "Ahh!"

Lucifer raises an eyebrow.

Y/n: "The Devildom...?"

Diavolo: "Yes, exactly the Devildom. I see you catch on quickly. Excellent. I'm Diavolo. Ruler of all demons, and all hear know of me."

Y/n: Big ego, huh?

Diavolo: "And someday soon, I'll be crowned king of the Devildom."

Y/n: The ego makes more sense.

Diavolo: "This is the Royal Acadamy of Diavolo. We just call it RAD."

Y/n raises an eyebrow at the name.

Y/n: "Where am I?"

Diavolo: "I'm getting there, kid. You're standing in the heart of Rad. Right outside the assembly hall."

Y/n: "Why am I here?"

Lucifer: *Under his breath* "Diavolo wanted to take care of a child."

Y/n: "Huh?"

Lucifer: "I'll explain everything to you."

Diavolo: "This is Lucifer-"

Y/n: "Cool!"

Y/n runs up to him.

Lucifer: "Uhh."

Diavolo: "Avatar of Pride, my most trusted friend."

Lucifer: "Flattery will get you nowhere, Diavolo-"

Y/n: "I wouldn't say that. My ma always said: If you flatter a person enough they might fall in love!"

Lucifer: "We offer you the most heartfelt welcome, Y/n."

Y/n: "Answer me, pwease?"

Lucifer: "Interesting. Must be because you are still a child-"

Y/n: "Did you know the human brain doesn't fully develop until the person is 25 years old."

Lucifer: "Diavolo wants us to..."

Diavolo: "Strengthen our relationship with the human world and Celestial realm."

Lucifer: "That's gonna go over her head to a degree."

Y/n: "You want to what?"

Lucifer: "Create friendships with the Celestial Realm and Human World."

Y/n: "Oh! Can I be your friend?"

Lucifer: "Sure kid-"

Y/n: "Can I call you Lulu?"

Lucifer: "Ahh?"

Diavolo: "Yes! Can I have a nickname too?"

Y/n: "Dia! Meaning 'day' or 'goddess'. It is a gender-neutral name of Spanish origin. "

Diavolo: "Eh, it works." Lulu. Lucifer is gonna kill someone if anyone else starts calling him that.

Lucifer: "As I was saying, at the end of the year, you'll write a few sentences describing your time here."

Y/n: "You demon!"

Lucifer: "What do you hope to gain pointing that out to me?"

Y/n pouts and glares at him.

Lucifer: "Don't glare at me. I'm not gonna abandon you by yourself. You need someone to look after you, and I think that someone should be Mammon. He's the Avatar of Greed and how should I put it...?"

Y/n: "Naive, bad lair, greedy, a kleptomaniac?"

Lucifer: "All of the above, but how do you know what a kleptomaniac is?"

Y/n: "My dad, would give me a dictionary whenever I was bored."

Lucifer: "Here it's a D.D.D. "

Y/n: "Ooh!" Y/n calls Mammon.

~Phone Call~

Mammon: Yooooo.

Y/n: Yooooo.

Mammon: Are you fooling around who are you?

Y/n: "I'm a hooman.

Mammon: A human? Geez, I was gettin' all chilly here thinkin' it was Lucifer again. Ya should've told me right away. So, what business does a human got with the Mammon?

Y/n: Let's be friends.

Mammon: Eh, What're ya even sayin'...? Ahh! I get it now, you're the other human-the new exchange student!

Y/n: Exchainge?

Mammon: Exchange student you swapped one school for another for a year. Good luck with that, see ya.

Y/n: LuLu called for you.

Mammon: Who?

Y/n: Lu-Luc-Lucifer! Yay! I did it.

Mammon: Pfft, whatever. Ya think THE Mammon would listen to ya just 'cause you're tryin' to scare me with that name.

~Off phone~

Y/n: *Whispering* "LuLu, Mama-mon isn't listening."

Lucifer: *Whispering* "Mam."

Y/n: "Ma'am."

Lucifer: "Mon."

Y/n: "Mon."

Lucifer: "Mammon."

Y/n: "Ma'am mon."

Lucifer: "Close enough."

~on Phone~

Lucifer: You've got 10 seconds. 9. 8.

Mammon: "Yes Sir!"