Stolen from me

Pain

April 1st 2023
Beyoncé

It's been 11 years since Amariana was taken away and me and Jay were still hurt but we had to get it together for our second child blue who is 5 years old we love her to death but ever since Amariana was kidnapped they make sure to keep her in there sight at all times. I just wish she was here with us for us to raise the children we created and love them.

It was April 1st 9:35 I felt a tap on my arm causing me to turn and opens my heavy eyes from sleep and crying when I opened my eyes I saw my daughter looking at me her hair was out and flowing down her shoulders her eyes hazel brown like mine and her skin smooth and glowing in the sun she had her bear in her hand with a small smile on her face looking at me I got a flash of Amariana and it made me tear up a bit.

"Daddy said to come eat mommy" she said with a smile on her face. I wiped my eyes quickly thanking god she didn't see my tears "ok baby I'm coming"

she ran out the room as I got out go bed I went in the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror my eyes were puffy and red and I was really pale I hate feeling this way but when something doesn't come back to help you from feeling this way you keep thinking about it and your gonna realest the feeling. I quickly get cleaned up and try to fix get myself together the best I could.

"BEYYYY FOOD DONE"  I hear my husband yell, after I was done putting my hair in a messy bun I took a deep breath trying to convince myself today is gone be a great day I left the bathroom hitting the light switch.

I go downstairs and see my husband he tries so hard to be positive for me about the situation but he really is hurting. He lost weight she looks pale and sometimes he goes to the car and sits and cries he doesn't like crying around us and it hurts be to know I failed him and our daughter. I sat down at the table and began to slowly eat. I looked over at blue who wasn't eating

"Baby how come your not eating" I asked taking a bite of my cut up pancake

"Mommy who that" she said point to the wall of a picture of Amariana when she had her baby's photo shoot with me for essences

"That's your sister" I said looking down feeling like I was getting ready to cry

"We're is her now" she asked I looked at Shawn and shook my head letting him know i can't do this she asked us every day who it is and we keep telling her

"Baby we told you all of this already" I said in frustration we literally tell her this everyone she asks us but we try our best to explain it in a kid friendly way even though I cry about it sometimes.

"I know but i forgot" she said in a sad tone looking down holding her best close to her chest

"WELL STOP FORGETTING" I yelled feeling frustrated causing blue to jump at my sudden burst of anger. She shouldn't have to be forgotten form is in the first damn place. I looked at blue and she was in tears and I felt bad she is only 5 she doesn't know any better.

"Baby I'm sorry mommy is sorry I didn't mean to yell at you" I said hugging her as she cried into my chest she pulled away from me and ran over to Shawn he held her close and I sighed rubbing my temples as I watched. He whispered in her ear and she noded her head a few times in understanding of her fathers words she noded one last time before they let go and she ran upstairs. Shawn looked at me with a blank mug on his face and I knew what he was thinking

"Don't" I said getting up to going  to the sink clean me and blues plates

"What do you mean don't Beyoncé" he said coming to me

"Shawn not right now please" i said cleaning the dish aggressively feeling anger coming because I know how this was bout to go

"So when, when do you feel right now needs to happened I keep telling you stop taking your anger out on everyone we're all hurt just like you and it's not blues fault stop yelling at her about it" he yelled pulling my arm tinting me sprint to face him before I snatched it away