Coffee Conversations

15- Crush/Stain

I smile as I watch Ledger recline in his leather arm chair, swilling his mug of coffee like an old man with an aged whiskey. His gestures become more and more enthusiastic as he speaks.

It's only a matter of time, I just know it.

"I'm taking Everett to the park, we're going to paint mini canvases and then give them to each other. It's going to be so fucking cute I feel physically unwell." He says, grinning maniacally.

My heart squeezes gently in my chest as his coffee sloshes dangerously close to the rim of his mug.

"That sounds like a great date." I say softly.

Ledger opens his mouth to respond just as his coffee makes a break for freedom, diving beyond its confines and finding a new home on his cream turtle neck shirt. I still in my seat, a resigned sigh escaping my lips.

"Fuck." He mumbles, freezing in place as he surveys the chocolate coloured liquid seep into his clothes.

"I'll get a napkin." I say immediately, cringing as I watch him rub the coffee further into his shirt.

"No! Why are you doing that? Stop rubbing it in!" I demand, lurching towards him and shooing his fingers away.

"It's my immediate instinct." Ledger says stupidly and I roll my eyes.

He grins, patting the back of my hand fondly.

"I'm going to go and waterboard myself quickly, see if I can get it out. Everett will be so pissed, he just got me this shirt." He says chirpily, sauntering into the toilet.

I chuckle under my breath as I watch him disappear.

But my smile fades, souring with the ache in my chest. I know it's a new shirt, I know because I helped Everett pick it. I knew it would make his eyes look like molten chocolate, fitting his broad chest like a glove, and it does.

Since Ledger and Everett had settled into their new place and I had started performing full time, we've found a new normal.

Ledger and I come here for coffee and catch-up every Thursday, where the day is mine until 4:30pm, which is when I need to be at the theatre warming up. I also get to see him every Sunday, which has now been deemed the new 'Craft Thursday'. It's not quite the same, but given everything that's changed and the dream job I now get to call mine, I'm grateful for every single second that I get to keep Ledger close.

"It's sort of pathetic, you know."

I look up suddenly, startled by the voice close at hand.

His dark blue eyes are narrowed, his entire expression pinched. His hair is freshly dyed, the same shade as his eyes, his brows as dark as the fitted t-shirt that lays beneath his crisp green apron. His fingers toy with the wet cloth in his hand, his stocky figure towering over me.

"Sorry?" I ask.

"Your crush on him." He clarifies, nudging his head towards the toilets in a jerky sort of movement.

My cheeks tingle slightly, threatening my usual calm. I take a breath, my eyes darting towards the toilets.

"I don't have a crush on him, I mean, not any-....we're just friends and I...it's not like that." I stutter, finally deciding to just end the sentence before I end my existence.

Are my feelings really that obvious? And why am I even bothering to try and explain this to him of all people?

He stares back at me, his disdain seeping into every pore of his face.

"Right." He says sarcastically.

"He's my brother's boyfriend. We're just friends." I add, a little more confidently this time.

Blue's frown contorts into disgust.

"That's even worse. Does your brother know?" He asks.

I feel my expression sink, my lower lip folding into my mouth as I lean back, gazing at the cup between my hands. I can feel my heart heavy in my chest, a familiar ache in my belly as though it's rotting and festering there, the guilt eating away at me.

No, he doesn't know, and I would rather die than tell him.

Because Everett deserves all the happiness in the world, and he'd give up everything for us. He already has, in so many ways. My own feelings, which have been a lot more resilient than I had hoped, feel like the ultimate betrayal, disgusting me to my very core and belittling any goodness I have in me. So I do what I do best. Act.

"There's nothing to tell." I say smoothly, a small practiced smile gracing my lips. He scoffs, rolling his eyes.

"Who are you fooling?" He asks.

"Blue! Stop harassing customers."

I peer round his side, smiling when I spot Rex glaring at his brother with his hands on his hips. His expression changes when he spots me, however, melting into a friendly smile as he waves. I wave back, pouting momentarily when Blue's body blocks my view of his brother.

I glance back at Blue, watching his scowl deepen in response to my smile.

"Why are you smiling?"

"I'm not." I say innocently, but I can still feel my lips stretched into a traitorous smile.

"Are you a fucking idiot?" He asks slowly.

I spot Ledger over his shoulder and grin blindingly, standing up before Ledger can catch on. Or say something stupid.

"Hey, it's troll doll!" He says, gesturing to Blue's hair.

Too late.

Blue looks about two seconds away from slapping Ledger silly and I decide to intervene, regardless of how much he might deserve it, and how entertaining it would be.

"It was nice chatting with you!" I say, waving as I simultaneously shoo my friend out before the stain can set in his shirt.

Blue's glare follows me the whole way out, but strangely enough, I don't mind.

-

A/N

Sorry it's late!

Fun fact: This is the first chapter I wrote for CC, and the book was going to start here, until I realised that there was a whole lot of unfinished business that I needed to attend to.

Have a great week everyone-

F