His Lotus

25

Thamarai

I was determined to accept this fresh start! I had smiled when my cousins adorned me with jewels. I hadn't been wavering even when they told me about Deva mama bringing his girlfriend here. And due to that reaction of mine, I reckoned I was succeeding in forgetting about him...

However, I was proved wrong the moment I saw him! A mere glimpse of him brought back the memories and feelings that I desperately wanted to demolish and all over once again, I fell and submerged into the same dilemma from which I'd thought I was out of.

As a result, the whole ceremony went terrible! I couldn't look into Velu's eyes while being in love with someone else. But the times I spared him glances, I gathered the dispassionate...almost bland mein on his countenance. He didn't spoke anything to me throughout the ceremony and had just nodded his head towards me during his departure.

He roses skepticism in me but I have no idea whether I'm right or being illusory. Only time could answer every one of my doubts...

Presently, I disrobed myself from the engagement saree and wore a pink half saree. I'm exhausted both physically and mentally but I'm scared to take a rest, afraid that I would give into overthinking and end up crying again. Hence I decided to roam outside. That wasn't the only reason why I didn't want to rest...I want to see my Deva mama!

Seeing him would hurt me, especially when he has brought his girlfriend with him. But I couldn't resist the urge to look at him even when I'm aware that my heart is about to shatter into more pieces.

Braiding my hair and letting it cascade down my waist, I exit my room and step down to the empty lounge. Everyone must be gathered in Deva mama's home. Thus I proceeded to saunter outdoors and found my cousins playing hopscotch on the ground except Maithili akka. I scarcely saw her during the ceremony too. She is been acting really distinct since a few days and I have no idea why!

Sending a glance at my cousins, I make my way towards Deva mama's house where on the veranda, some of my aunts were seated.

I was about to step inside but hesitated when my eyes lands on his girlfriend who is reclined between him and his mother. They seem to be chatting merrily except Deva mama. He appears inattentive and dull...

What had occurred to him?

Shouldn't he be happy that his family accepted his girlfriend??

"Ha, engagement girl," I shriek for a second when I heed that despicable voice. My eyes strain on the stairs from which a freshly showered Harsh is stepping down. I haven't seen him throughout the ceremony and thought that he isn't invited!

At his call, the people hunched on the lounge raises their head to look at me.
"Where were you all this time??" Deva mama's girlfriend questions him and he swiftly reaches the couch on the opposite and sits there as he starts to speak.

"Someone locked me up in the room," he says and glares at my mama who has his gaze fixed on me. My heart stumbles as I realize he has been watching me for a while...

Suddenly, his girlfriend's phone rings, and she nervously excuses herself and goes to the backyard. "Aunt! Could you please give me a cup of tea!?" Harsh request aunt and she kindly nods before sauntering to the kitchen, leaving the three of us alone.

I ponder to disappear from the place but Deva mama's eyes on me have me stand unmoving. "Thamara, come here!" I  frown at Harsh's calling. "Come on Thamara," I shift my eyes to Deva mama, and yet again, he is staring into my soul without any care to our surroundings. I'm sure Harsh has noticed Deva mama's strange demeanor too...

Gulping, I stroll inside and settle on the couch where my Deva mama was but on the other end. By now, he isn't looking at me, rather is grimacing at the floor with his one hand fisted while the other lay on the armrest.

What is wrong with him?

"Thamara," I dart my view to Harsh again. "Tell," I say curtly. Just then, Deva Mama's girlfriend breaks into the lounge and hurriedly blurts out. "Deva, I need to get back to the city as soon as possible! It was my stepfather who called me...mom got into an accident and now is in critical condition. I don't like her, but she is still my mother..." She says dramatically to my Deva mama who appears alerted. "I need to go soon Deva," and with that, she runs to his mother's room and gets back with her backpack.

"I'm sorry, I will visit sometime in the future and stay longer," she blurts out quickly to Deva mama's mother who is now in the lounge.

"Harsh, accompany her. It's not safe to travel alone," Deva mama commands to his bastard of a friend who surprisingly seem serious all of a sudden and follows her back.

And in a quick order, she bid bye to everyone and left the place with Harsh.

"Are you going to be here for the next three days mama?" I question him as soon as we get back inside the home and everyone resumed to do what they were previously performing.

"Why? Do you want me to go to the city today itself?" He asks sourly.

"Why do you always interpret my words in the wrong way?" I amuse, feeling giddy at his girlfriend and best friend's departure. I do feel bad for her mother but I hope she would be alright...

"Podi.. (just go) go and talk with your fiance," he states tiredly as he climbs the stairs. I follow behind him with a smile. "I will speak with him at night..." I emphasize the word night, in a pitiful attempt to render him feel jealous although I'm conscious of the fact that he wouldn't.

Unpredicted, he abruptly stops at the top stair, swirls to me and I crash against him. Then the typical scenario that I've only seen in movies and serials came into reality as Deva mama rescues me with his hands around my waist when I was about to plummet down the stairs.

My eyes flutter open wide as his fingers grab at my bare waist rigidly, sending millions of butterflies to flee across my stomach. Deva mama stares at me with a mein that carries a stern yet soothing expression.

As If he is relishing what he is doing.

"Mama...are you waiting for the background song to play?" His bubble breaks and he frowns at me but his hands stay banded around my waist.

"You speak too much.." he adduce in an annoyed tone. "That I'm aware of mama! Now leave me," I grab at his wrist, desperately wanting his hands off to make this bizarre feel in my stomach to disappear...

Not that I don't like it but I know that it is wrong.

"I won't," he says flatly and maintains the grip. "Mama, I'm engaged. You really shouldn't touch me as you wish," I say lowly and peek downstairs, checking If someone is witnessing us.

Fortunately, no!

"Oh? Is that so?" He asks nonchalantly. "Stop teasing me, mama. You are crossing your limits. You know you are doing wrong by touching me," I hiss in a small voice and he suddenly squeezes my waist tightly.

I gasp and look at him, bewildered.

"Do you really...like your fiance?" He questions sincerely. "Yes," he leaves me at my answer and walks inside his room, furiously.

Is he jealous? Is he feeling possessive of me? My heartbeat quickens as I approach his room and stand at the entrance.

Deva mama is removing his shirt buttons, irately. "Mama..." He doesn't respond.

"I like him, mama..." I say again and visibly his actions become ferocious.
"I heard that the first time!" He shouts but it flows as sweet as honey to my ear. He really is jealous...

"But you haven't heard this mama.." I trail off. "What?" He retorts back, glaring at me. "That I like you more," I   run away before he could react to my words.

I don't know If what I'm doing is right or wrong but it makes me happy...

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