Magnetic

Chapter 10

My phone was buzzing incessantly on my bedside table. My body felt too heavy to move but I needed to shut it off before I threw it against the wall. As I reached for it, I heard the knock on my front door. I peeled my eyes open, squinting at the sudden brightness, even though my curtains were closed. I looked at who was calling and saw it was Jessi. The knock came again.
"Oh shit." I finally remembered we were supposed to meet up. I wondered why she didn't call or text before she got here. I groaned and rolled out of bed, shuffling to the front door. I pulled it open to see her standing before me with a grocery bag in one hand and takeout in the other, along with her phone. She frowned.
"Did you just wake up?" She asked. I nodded, stepping aside so she could enter. "You left early last night though?" She set the items on my coffee table and sat on the couch.
"Yeah, just tired." That was an understatement. I felt worn out. As soon as I got home, I showered and went to bed, falling asleep almost immediately. I looked at the time on my phone. "It was almost one in the afternoon. Shit.
"Is it okay that I'm still here? I didn't want you to change your mind on me but I guess I shouldn't force it on you either."
"No, it's fine. Lemme just go brush my teeth." I gave her a reassuring smile which seemed to relax her some. I hurried to the bathroom to brush my teeth then changed into sweatpants and a hoodie before joining her on the couch. She had set out everything she brought with her. Champagne and orange juice, apparently for mimosas, and a breakfast spread from Eggsodus, which was her favorite brunch spot. Waffles, eggs, bacon, and breakfast potatoes. She handed me a full plate when I sat down and I thanked her. "Why'd you sneak out so early yesterday?" She asked once we were settled. There was no way I was telling her about Chanyeol. There was no need to, so I went with my typical answer.
"Just tired." I said with a shrug. She seemed to accept that.
"We were talking about going to pick pumpkins next weekend. Wanna come?"
"I'll think about it." I said, taking a bite of my potatoes. Her chewing slowed and she looked down at her plate before looking back at me.
"So about yesterday..." And here we go. "I still feel really bad about what happened."
"You shouldn't." I said. "It honestly is kind of selfish of me to expect you guys to come running to me to find out what was going on when all I keep doing is pull away. Of course you'll get tired and feel like there's nothing you can do anyway. You have your own lives."
"Yeah, but...we still left you hanging." She said. "That wasn't really fair to you especially given what you were going through. With Sehun then Eric...I understand why you would pull away." I chewed silently. I didn't even know if I wanted to get into this. I hadn't talked to anyone about it because I knew how it would feel doing so. I didn't want to open that door.
"It's whatever." I shrugged, picking at my eggs.
"No it's not Brooke." Jessi was frustrated now. She set her plate down and fully turned to me. "I don't like this. I am your friend and I'm not going to let you just brush this off. What happened clearly affected you and – you know what? I'm not going to push you." She took a deep breath. I was already feeling myself shrink. Drawing into myself again. I felt nauseous. "That's not fair either. Look, I just want you to know that I'm here. What Sehun did was fucked up and we're not even going to go there with Eric, but, whenever you want to talk about it, I'm here." I nodded.
"Thanks." I said meekly, not meeting her gaze. My chest felt tight. I was starting to feel uneasy. I set my plate down and pulled my knees up to my chest. She glanced at my plate but said nothing.
"Is there anything you do want to talk about?" She asked gently. I shook my head and she nodded. "So then tell me what's been up these past few weeks?"
"Not much really. Just focusing on school to be honest."
"Boo." She said. I giggled.
"Tell me about you and Jackson." I picked up my mimosa and took a sip. "How did that finally happen?"

She was more than happy to gush about her new relationship and I was more than happy with the topic change. This just led to more hours of chatting mindlessly as we usually did about anything that came to mind. We laughed over a movie and by five in the evening, she decided to call it a day because apparently Jackson was needing her attention now. I hugged her goodbye, promising I wouldn't disappear on her again, and she left. If I were being honest, having Jessi over was nice. Having someone familiar with everything but not forcing anything was nice. She left the door open for me to come to her and although I wasn't sure I would ever take her up on that, it was nice to know the option was there. That she was there.