Watch Your Step

Nina's Tea Party #3

"You're right, he's nuts," Nate mumbled and gargled water in his mouth. He could barely bend down as the water splashed on his puke-stained face. "Should we still pursue this?"

"I'm not the one who's so eager to take this guy's story when we can have other interesting appointments!"

"Shut up. This is going to be our big break."

"You still believe that after — here he comes."

Andy has a distinct rhythm to his walk, with his feet being pointing in the opposite directions. He was holding the broom and dustpan in one hand after cleaning Nate's mess. His other hand was scratching his armpit and then he casually smelled the fingers he used to scratch. "Where were we — oh I was about to show you my hobby, right?"

"Is that it?" Jill asked, "Trapping animals?"

"No, no," he cackled.

Andy led them to the center of the garden, where the umbrellas skewered into a table, stood. Teapots and teacups were arranged on the white cover of the napery. While the sun shone upon the yellow-green background. It looked straight out of a novel. There were two seats available and the third was occupied by someone. No, not someone, something.

The person Jill thought taking shelter in the umbrella was a beautiful doll. But not just any doll, it was closer than anything to a life-like doll, it's almost as if it's a real person. It was wearing an antique bonnet tied on under its chin. Her body was dressed in a voluminous dress and her hands were covered with gloves.

"Lady and gent, meet my lovely wife, Nina."

Jill didn't know how to react. Her mouth fell agape and looked at her partner. On the contrary, this seemed to pique Nate's interest because his eyes were gleaming as though he had just seen gold in the rough.

"As a child, our parents used toys to make us happy, right? It's the same," Andy said as he held the doll's hand, "she makes me happy."

"Sit, sit," Andy commanded, "Oh sorry fat guy, you don't have a seat, I'll just get one." He then stood up and headed to his house.

Once he's out of range, Jill inspected the doll closer. It has auburn hair and long mascaras. Its skin was powdery with lips that were dry scarlet. The doll looked somewhat familiar, somewhat alive. "That's gotta be a real person," Jill said. "I think we should call the cops."

"What? No!" Nate protested.

"What do you mean, no?"

"We gotta confirm it first."

"And if we do confirm it?"

Their conversation was cut halfway.

Andy came back with his same disoriented walk but he's now with a chair hanging on his hand. After they all sat, Andy took the teapot and poured each of them its contents. "You need sum'o this tea."

"What's in it?" Jill questioned holding her cup to her lips.

"Poison."

The two reporters hesitated to drink.

"Oh, c'mon it's a joke!

Jill gave a disingenuous laugh and looked at her partner. Nate drinks it and clicks his head meaning to say, just get along with it.

"Oh, don't forget to hold out your pinkie!" Andy said, sticking his own smallest finger.

"Mr. Anderson, where did you say you bought it again?" Nate asked, "I might want to buy myself one."

Jill gave Nate a look of disgust and a questioning look that questions, Are you crazy?

"Ahh, she's a limited model in the 1990s," Andy answered as he sipped his tea.

"The 90s?"

"Yeah, she was born in the 1990's" Andy coughed on his teacup, "I mean, made. Made in the 1990s."

"Wow."

"That's what I like about her, she doesn't age."

Nate tried to touch the doll. "It looks so —"

"She!" Andy's expression became dark as he repeated, "She. Always address her as she and never it because she's not a thing."

"But you said she was made, not born" Jill retorted.

"Well," Andy stuttered, "Aren't we all made by the hand of some greater being?"

"Can I touch her?" Nate requested.

"If you want to," Mr anderson replied

"She's quite warm."

"That's because it's real human skin."

This statement which would once have struck Jill with such banalities as there's a poop under your shoe now seemed not banal at all. She was so close to believing it. Nate laughed. But Jill felt chills from this crazy man whose words don't align to what he means and as a journalist, this is what Jill hates the most.

"I'm just joking, Jill!" Andy cracked in a gruff voice like there's phlegm stuck in his throat. Then he clapped his hands, "Tomorrow we're going to have a formal tea party and you are both invited."

Just now, Jill could've sworn that the doll's eyes blink.