Lost // AnakinSkywalker X Reader

my past.

2.3k words

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Anakin's Pov:

She didn't have a nightmare last night, I did.

But this nightmare was unlike any I had ever had before, it was of (Y/n). She was stuck in a dark cell peering out of a glass wall. Before I knew what was happening she was on the ground in front of me, trying to maintain her tough composure but I could sense the fear radiating off her. I looked down at her and my heart shattered. I despised seeing her like this, I couldn't handle how she was looking at me like I was evil. I went to bend down and comfort her and suddenly there was a bright red light shining between us. I looked down to see myself wielding a red lightsaber plunged deep into her stomach. Her eyes widened and she let out a gasp, and my eyes shot open.

I sat up in bed sweating and panting uncontrollably. I shuffled on the bed so I could get a clear view of her sleeping peacefully on the daybed. She was so beautiful, ever since I saw her in the hallway she had me under a spell. I couldn't stand it. This isn't the first time I noticed her beauty, but it is the first time I felt an unfamiliar feeling in my chest. My body moved before my mind could register what was happening, and I moved over to the daybed and kneeled so I was at her level. Her chest, rising and falling with each sleeping breath she took, was enough to send a fluttering through my body. I internally cursed myself out for my body's unwanted actions. I would never hurt her, I couldn't imagine a universe in which I could do so.

Before I could register what I was doing, I slowly lifted the blanket off her and picked her up, bridal style, and carried her to the bed. I was trying so hard to push the image of her dying by my hand from my mind, but it stayed, torturing me. The only thing I wanted to do was hold her close and never let her go, so that's exactly what I did.

I placed her gently on the bed under the covers and lay down beside her, watching her stay in her slumber. I gently pulled her closer to me so her head was resting against my chest and wrapped my arms around her, everything in my mind screaming at me to let go, run away, and never see her again. But my body and my mind were not on speaking terms it seems, as my grip on her tightened and I leaned my head down atop hers, inhaling her scent. 

She smelled like the freshest lavender in a field on the sunniest day of spring. I hated myself for these thoughts about her, I despised how beautiful I found her, even more so how she made me feel, and that made me hate her. 

My train of thought was interrupted as she wrapped her arm around my torso, resting her hand on my bare back. Her touch alone sent goosebumps up my skin. I heard her sigh contently in her sleep as her chest moved in synch with mine. I focused on her breathing transpiring with mine, and slowly found myself falling asleep.

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I woke up the moment her head moved, sensing her panic through the force. I didn't think this through very well. Last night when I brought her up here all I could think of was how I needed her up here with me. I needed to feel her and make sure she was safe. I knew my nightmare was just that, a nightmare. But something deep inside me reminds me of my nightmares about my mother and how true those turned out to be. Logically I should continue to outwardly despise her and internally suffer with my battling newfound feelings, if the nightmare holds any merit, I need to keep her away from me. There were so many things troubling me about the events of last night, but not when I had her in my arms the way I did at this moment.