I Remember You.

Chapter 01 - Just Like Lightning.

Los Angeles, USA...
LAX Airport...
Kevin (Vin) Creekman...

Have you ever felt like you have just been struck by enough lightning to rewire your entire central system?

I don't quite know how else to describe this feeling inside of me. I am usually so in control, so calm and centred. I am the dependable one. Out of all my friends, it is me who people lean on, it is me they come to for advice and it is me that holds everything down when others are losing their minds over whatever life throws at them. I have always sort of just fit into that role. Even before my life changed for the better. Even before what my ex believed to be a mistake entered our lives. Even before my whole world was turned on its axis and I was thrust into the role of a lifetime.

Father.

Most people say it was stupid to take on the responsibility when I was so young. 15-years old and the very first time I had sex I got my ex pregnant. Even to this day it feels unreal in a way that can still steal my breath from me.

Draven. My daughter. The apple of my damn eye in ways I can't even begin to articulate. There was nothing on this planet that I wouldn't do for her. I knew from the moment she was placed in my arms that this little girl, this little bundle of screaming energy was going to be the love of my life. I guess you could say the very moment her tiny little fingers gripped around one of my fingers - I was a goner, wrapped around her little finger, her beast, her protector, her provider. I would do whatever I had to, to ensure her safety, her happiness, and her health. My ex, however, never found that unconditional love that sparked for me from the moment she was placed in my arms. Claire didn't even want anything to do with naming her own daughter. She barely even mustered the energy to feed our little girl.

Post-partum.

I tried to be supportive. I tried to give Claire the time she needed to wrap her mind around whatever it was that she was struggling with. The doctors told us that the "baby-blues" my ex was feeling usually fade away after a week or two but for Claire they only seemed to get worse. From the moment we left the hospital with our daughter it was as if she just detached herself from the situation. I would come home from school to find Draven screaming in her cot while Claire had shut herself in the bathroom and often had the shower running just to drown out the wails of our little girl.

I am thankful that my parents were at my side through all of this. They supported me, they took care of Draven while I finished out my schooling and continued to help when I got a job at the local tattoo shop.

I thought that going back to school would help Claire and for a few weeks it felt like maybe it was helping, she would seem more receptive of Draven when she got home from school, but it didn't last. Not when she saw her friends going out and having fun, having relationships free of responsibilities. On Draven's first birthday, Claire walked out the front door under the pretence of going to get cupcakes for the small party we were throwing, and she just never came back. Even to this day, I don't have a damn clue what happened or where she went. Of course, I was frantic and called everywhere I could think of as I tried to find her, eventually her parents told me that she was fine, but she wasn't coming back.

I never understood that.

How could she walk away from our perfect little girl?

I had gone from a two-parent home to a single father in the span of a couple of hours. At first, I wasn't sure what I was going to do.

Would I have to give Draven up?

Would I have to find her a new home?

It never crossed my mind that I could be a single father. And it took my parents a long time to show me that I had basically been a single dad all this time as Claire just had never fully committed to our daughter, she never felt that bond that I had from the moment I held Draven in my arms.