Drunk and lonely

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My vision was so blurry. I should have stopped several drinks ago. I forced myself to stay on my feet, to not fall. Carefully I took one step. And then another.

I can walk home. Yeah. Yeah, sure I can. People were talking around me. The party was still ongoing but I couldn't hear them. I could only focus on one thing and I choose that to be my feet.

A few hours ago, I went to a halloween party with my best friend, Tara. But I quickly saw my ex, while he was busy putting his tongue down a random girls throat. I scoffed, thinking that he sure moved on quickly. I guess I wasn't that important to him afterall.

I took a shot after that to try and forget what I'd just seen. Then I played beerpong with some guys, and drank more. Tara had to leave when her sister showed up, but I didn't want to leave. So Tara, reluctantly, left without me.

And now, I'm here. Too drunk to stand, too drunk to sit down because then I'd fall asleep. I'm so tired. I'd left the house where the party had been and had already walked a few steps from the house. But I do live far away, I know that, even while drunk.

"Hey, are you okay?" A voice could be heard in the distance. It sounded like a cute voice. Cuter than my ex.

"No." I answered, truthfully. I looked up from the ground. A guy was standing in front of me. I tried to focus on his face. After a short moment I could see that he had kind, brown eyes. Brown, curly hair. Ethan. Ethan Landry in the flesh. He's a friend of Tara but we've never really talked to each other. But looking at him now... He was the perfect distraction from my ex.

"Should I call someone? You look really drunk." He asked, tilting his head. He had this weird cardboard box costume but with an unmatching hat.

I laughed, and then tried to give him my most flirtatious smile.

"Do you want to sleep together?" I asked, while trying to look more sober than I was. Ethan blinked once.

"What?" He asked, even though I'm sure he had heard what I had said. I repeated what I said and he quickly shook his head. "No, I heard what you said but uhm, we don't know each other and uhm. You know, taking you home now seem a bit sudden." He rapidly said.

Ethan took a moment and looked me up and down. His eyes widened.

"Or, maybe that's not what you meant. Do you need a place to sleep?"

I blinked, feeling mentally slow. I shrugged.

"I don't know, but you're cute."

Ethan turned red in less than a second. A light smile crept across his face.

"Do you think I'm cute?"

"Yeah." Then I felt how my stomach moved. "I'm gonna puke." I warned him before bending over and puking right next to Ethans shoes. The alcohol I had just consumed, the snacks I had stolen from the party and so on. It was now on the ground.

Ethan jumped away, cursing. He looked at me like I was an alien.

"I-I'm sorry." I said, wiping my mouth with my arm.

"It's... okay." Ethan sounded hesitant. I looked up at him.

"I'm so, so sorry. I've been drinking too much because I saw my ex and I really didn't need to see him make out with another girl and..." I stopped myself. Realising that I had been unloading my baggage onto Ethan. But to my surprise, he didn't look bothered by me.

He shook his head. "Y/n, come with me."

I lit up.

"Are you gonna take me home with you?"

"Uhm yes, but just so that you can sleep."

"That's so nice of you."

"Uhm, thanks?"

Ethan and I walked back to Ethans dorm room. He told me that he was sharing it with Chad, but that Chad was already asleep. It wasn't a long walk. I believe. I walked withe support from Ethan. I held onto his arm until we were in his room.

The midnight walk had helped. I felt more sober now, but I was still very drunk. I looked around me. Chads side of the room was a mess. Clothes everywhere, nothing were in order. Ethans side of the room was the complete opposite. He didn't have a lot of things. A bed and a desk. No personal belongins either.

I made a mental note to ask him about that tomorrow.

Ethan led me towards his bed and carefully sat me down on it.

"You should get some sleep, Y/n." He said quietly, locking eyes with me. I stared at him... And then his lips.

"Thank you." I tried to smile like an seductress but probably failed. "We could share the bed, you know?"

Ethans cheek did once again turn red. He took a step back.

"I mean... Goddammit. Don't get me wrong. I would like to do that. With you. Do it with you. But..." He said while walking towards his closet. He opened it and pulled out a t-shirt. He handed it to me. "I don't want to sleep with you because you're drunk and probably won't even remember this conversstion tomorrow."

I looked at the t-shirt in my hand. Without a second thought I pulled off the tight party top I was wearing. Ethan immediately turned around and looked up at the ceiling. I pulled Ethans t-shirt over my head, and couldn't help but to notice that it smelt like him.

"I have clothes now." I said, making Ethan slowly turn towards me again. I shrugged.

"Thank you. But where are you going to sleep?"

"Oh, don't worry. I'll just sleep on the floor."

"The floor? No, I'll do that. I can't throw you out of your own bed..."

"Y/n. Just, please. Let me give you the bed."

"Ethan," I started, just like he had. "We can share the bed. And just sleep."

That actually managed to convince him. He eventually laid down beside me, but he was purposefully laying very close to the edge, so that I would have more room.

"I'm sorry for pushing, Ethan." I apologised, feeling a little ashamed.

"What? No, no. It's just that... I don't want you to sleep with me to try to get your ex out of your head. I want to sleep with you, when I'm the one who's in your head. I want to be more than your rebound."

I sat in silence, thinking. I heard his words but it was like I couldn't register them. Instead I looked at his back, observed the way his body moved as he breathed. It was soothing.

I've never seen Ethan like that before. And it may be the alcohol talking. But Ethan looked so beautiful right now. I could feel the heat from his body, even though we didn't even touch.

"Ethan, can I...?" I let my words trail off. Ethan just nodded and I took that as an answer. I raised my hand and touched his back. Followed imaginary lines on his back with my finger. "Thank you." I said underneath my breath.

He moved slightly.

"Anytime, Y/n."

I laid my head down on the soft pillow. My eyelids felt like concrete. Extremely heavy. Soon I was fast asleep.

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