A Normie's Guide To Mind-Reading | ONC 2023

Two ∆ Detect Catastrophes

It isn't a hyperbole to call Siti my saviour. Her appearance sets the world in motion and everyone goes back to minding their businesses. Drivers and passengers rush back to their cars, unperturbed by the rain. Some of them have found summons on their windscreens, Siti says. It appears there are things more merciless than the December rain on a sunny island.

I'm still reeling from the reveal when she returns with a fresh cup of my order and a Java Chip Frappé for herself and inserts herself between me and Murakami Man who is back to his silent reading. The window is littered with handprints and kiss marks, also a word of warning to "watch out when you cross the road". There's always a first time for everything, and I suppose death threats aren't out of the question now, huh?

The Chinese girl goes up the stairs with a plate of cake and the patrons who were upstairs tail her as though she's their leader. I have never witnessed anything more robotic than a bunch of-

"Shut up, Bryce." Siti flicks my forehead and I wince. She smirks and props her head on an upturned hand.

I wasn't talking.

"I can hear you." Her tone is venomous now. "Stop making snap judgements, okay?"

I sigh. "You never had a problem with it anyway."

"Well, you gotta tone it down now that you've attracted attention. They can hear you. Consent is important. We try not to tune into each other's thoughts unless there's a need to. And now, everyone is gonna be curious about you."

"That's not how consent really works. Can I sue them for invading my privacy?"

"Shut up."

"Okay, this time I was talking."

The traffic lights are red all over and the unfortunate cars stay stuck in the jam. Imagine being the cause of a traffic jam! If this isn't an Achievement Unlocked™ moment, I don't know what is. Siti's smile broadens. She knows. She leans closer and taps her temple twice.

I've known Siti for two years and she has always been the quiet, observant type. In this moment, she is observing everything I think, say and do. I wonder what it's like to hear someone else's thoughts. We simmer in the coffee-soaked silence, but we are saying and doing everything we want deep inside.

Siti. Where do I start? We were in the same orientation group in junior college. She was the one who initiated contact. Why does that make me sound like an alien? Does that make me sound like an alien?

Siti cuts in. "Each time you raise a question, you invite them inside your head. People love questions. Problems. Problematic people."

"Problematic? Me or them?"

"Who told you to go down the memory lane?"

I jerk my head slightly and sip my soy hojicha latte. This cup's less stifling. "Smells can evoke nostalgia. The Proustian Effect?"

Siti rolls her eyes and wishes we never knew each other. But I know she's very accommodating of my eccentricities, if these are truly what make me deviant. Or is it because I harness big Speak Good English Movement energy? I should halt the questions.

"What are your plans now?" I swirl my cup. "Are you going to work part-time?"

"Maybe. I'm thinking of volunteering somewhere."

"You're so kind."

"You?"

"I don't know. I'm not so nice."

Volunteering doesn't give you much in return. You offer time and love. You aren't paid. I'd rather work my ass off somewhere. Besides, spending that little time with the less fortunate might not help them as much as we think. Then, helping myself is better.