There is not much difference between love and hate; they both have the same effect on you at the end of the day, with hate having a higher margin in how it affects its victim.
With Serena spending her vacation in Paris to her meeting him Her vacati...
I needed to calm down and run somewhere where I wouldn't have to face anyone. I have fought with Zach before, but this time it affected me, it made a difference, and most importantly, it made me feel, even if it was frustration and anger, because before all of this, all I did was hate him, and I didn't care about him or anything else.
It's just that it took me years to realize how messed up my family is and how much trauma a child who never received parental affection can endure. It took me years to realize that I am nothing more than a project for my parents to be appreciated in the world. They only want me as a trophy to show how far their blood has prospered.
But then I met him - and it felt like everything was going to be okay. It was just that after meeting him after ages, I finally felt like I found someone who could understand me and story of why I am the way I am. I finally felt safe enough to stop pretending to be a version my parents created to flaunt me to this world.
I just felt like we were both damaged people, and I'm not sure why I got this glimmer of hope that maybe we could heal each other. So I wasn't expecting to be disappointed by his silence, but I was. I was disappointed because I had so much to say; I had never wanted to say so much to anyone before, but I did with him. But when he decided to leave when I had something to say, it brought back every disappointment I've ever had in my life, every time I needed to talk and my parents were never there.
I always thought that being with Zach would be hell. But like they say -
It's not hell if you like the way it burns. And I was starting to like whatever it was that we shared, be it the hell or that hellfire.
.
.
I was suddenly pulled out of my thoughts when I could hear my name being called -
"Serena"
That was when I actually took in my surroundings, I was so lost in my thought that I did not realize where I exactly was.
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"What are doing here in the gazebo?" Sebastian asked
"Gazebo.." Oh I am at the Gazebo.."I just needed some time for myself Sebastian
"Zach shouldn't have said all that to you" He said
"No, he shouldn't have. But he did." I say
"That was way too rude, you are nothing like he spoke of you Serena" He said smiling and walking closer to me
"Sebastian.." I said walking back "Maybe you don't know me, I am so much more complicated."
"Maybe Serena but I know you don't deserve to hear all that" He said with a concerned look
"He didn't lie Sebastian, he shouldn't have said it but he did not lie." I say taking into the reality of the situation
