The Fall

Chapter 16

Sage

I swallowed hard. My heart rate increasing with every second those words echoed in my head. I was raped. Ever since I woke up, my mind has been flashing back to that night, trying to piece everything together and while I don't completely remember everything I do know someone was in that room with me.

I stared at my trembling hands as Kade rubs his thumb against the back of my hand. "How... how do you know?" I whispered, taking my free hand to wipe the fresh tears falling down my face. I didn't need to look at his icy blue eyes to see the pain in them. He clears his throat and his hand tightens in mine. "When we found you, uh you were half naked. Your dress was practically torn off and you were covered in blood."

My eyes snap to his and I see it, the tornado of rage bubbling to the surface. Kaden's always been difficult to read, but when he's angry, that built up rage is downright scary. And he's angry... for me. "Kyle swore he locked you in there so you could sleep off the coke and whatever else you were high on."

"I remember being pissed at him. I um I said some fucked up things to him, Kade. I don't even know why I did it, I was just so fucking angry." I blew out a breath. When I was sober, my primary emotion was anger, granted I hid it well from everyone. "What do you remember?" Kade asks just as my dad poked his head in. I force a smile on my face as his gaze shifts from me to Kaden, who's frowning.

"What's going on?" Dad asks setting two cups of coffee on my bed table. "Were you crying, sweetheart?" The weight of his concern is overwhelming, but Kade sighs and gestures for him to sit, "She remembers being assaulted, Mr. H."

My father's face falls as he collapses into his chair and grasps my hand, his blue eyes teary, "I'm so sorry, sweetheart. You don't have to talk about this right now." He threw a glare at Kaden and I shrugged, "I don't remember much other than fighting with Kyle and I... I just felt so... alone and I hated myself so much..." I swallowed and closed my eyes, relieving that memory of those pills in my hand, feeling the weight of all the pain I'd caused like a boulder on my chest.

"You tried to kill yourself?" Kade whispered, his voice thick with emotion. It wasn't the first time I'd tried to kill myself, but this time I almost succeeded. Maybe I did. Maybe parts of me died over the years.

"I... I just wanted it to stop..." My eyes filled with tears and I couldn't look at either of them. My father held my trembling hand in his large one and brought it to his cheek. "I need you to know that you and your brother are my life. Yes, I've been focused on work over the years to give the two of you security for the rest of your lives, but the cost of that has been watching you grow up. Your mother and I failed at being emotionally invested with you kids and that is something I'll always regret." He sniffles and for the first time in years, I see my father, the man, not the CEO mogul I've grown up with on the rare occasions he was home.

I realized that he's human. Placed on a pedestal by everyone around him. My fingers stroke his stubble and I smile. Daddy's never let his facial hair grow out. Ever. He always said that clean cut is key to media success. Whatever that means.

"What happens now?" I ask my brows raised expectantly. Kaden runs his fingers throw his hair and glances at my father who reaches up and tucks a strand of hair behind my ear. "Well Dr. Stone will have a treatment plan in place tomorrow. Uh your mother and I have spoken privately about rehabilitation options."

Rehab? Again? Oddly since I've woken up drugs have been the last thing on my mind. My gaze shifts to Kaden's icy blue eyes and he nods in agreement. "I don't remember a day when you were completely sober in the last few years. I think it's time to really get help and not just to please us, but for yourself, Sage."

I've been down this road before. I tell them I'm fine and don't even need to go away, that I'm stronger now, better when in reality my demons haven't reeked enough havock that I crave a fix. Right now, I'm a mess of emotions and I'm processing everything. I want to feel it for the first time since I was sixteen years old, I want the pain, the anger to fuel me.

"Sage?" Dad taps my hand and I blink before focusing on him. "Everything okay? I know it's a lot right now, but Dr. Stone is confident we can get you the help you need."

I didn't want to talk about this anymore, so I yawned and settled back in my hospital bed, "Sure, Dad. As long as this place has horses. I miss riding." I closed my eyes and listened to them talk around me until eventually I fall asleep.

The next morning, I woke to a nurse in my room and I recognized her from last night. My gaze shifted to the empty seats in my room where Kaden and my father slept. "You're dad's speaking with our therapist, Dr. Lawrence. She's gonna get you set up with sessions while you're in treatment. Uh Kaden has class, but he'll be back. He always comes here after class."

He does? Butterflies fill my stomach at the thought of Kade sitting beside my comatose body and spilling his deepest darkest secrets. "When can I go home?" I asked when my father walked in with Dr. Stone and a slender woman, with blonde hair, pulled back and blue eyes looking at me like she can see into my soul.

"Good morning, Sage. I'm sure the last few hours have been pretty eventful. How are you feeling this morning." Dr. Stone asks looking over the notes Katie had input into my chart. I sigh and shift to a comfortable position, "I feel fine. Tired, but not as tired as I was yesterday. Everything feels slower in my head though, if that makes sense."

He nods and gestures to the blonde woman, "This is Dr. Lawrence. She's going to be seeing you as you begin treatment at Hillcrest. It's a rehabilitation and behavioral treatment facility in Tacoma that has the tools to help with your addiction as well as these depression episodes you've had over the years." My eyes narrow on Dr. Lawrence, but she smiles and clasps her hands in front of her.

"I know this is a lot to process at once, Sage. I assure you everyone just wants you to be healthy physically, mentally and emotionally. Dr. Stone tells me you're being discharged in a few days once accomodations have been made for you at Hillcrest." Dr. Lawrence smiles softly at me, but her eyes are calculating, analyzing my reaction for defiance perhaps.

My father moves beside me and placed a hand on my shoulder and nods before looking down at me. "I've read there's an animal farm there. Do you have horses? My daughter's quite passionate about them."

Dr. Lawrence beams and nods, "we do have animal therapy on the property. Our patients get to bond with an animal and it teaches them responsibility as well. Most of our patients with forms of PTSD and mental illness benefit quite well from animal therapy." Everyone turned their gazed to me expectantly.

I shrugged, not in a position to argue and I sigh, "I would like that." It's about time I get my shit together no matter how hard it will be. I'm ready to face my demons and destroy them.