Lone Werewolf

Escape

"I had a one-way ticket to a place where all the demons go
Where the wind don't change
And nothing in the ground can ever grow
No hope, just lies
And you're taught to cry in your pillow" - Sia, Alive

But I'll survive.

My hands shook as I dug at the dirt, the shovel trembling erratically as I attempted to pull the weeds out. Tears were trailing down my cheeks, but still I kept on weeding. What more could I do? I was worthless. It was worthless.

They executed Maple and her mate.

They killed them.

For what? Speaking out against a reckless, stupid, horrific and barbaric raid against another innocent pack? No, they betrayed the pack because apparently having a sensible mind was a crime, a betrayal. I stabbed at the ground, the shovel flying out my hands.

I furiously wiped away at my eyes, successfully coating my face in dirt. I didn't care. Couldn't care, not while they were dragging the prisoners of war down to the dungeons behind my very back. Not while she's dead.

I was refusing to look, but I could hear their shouts of protest.

I was refusing to look because I was a coward.

I was weak.

I looked.

I caught the eyes of a young woman, they were bloodshot and pleading with mine. They wanted me to save her, save her from the death that would surely come. I knew how the pack worked, they ruthlessly slaughtered without a single care. They were savages.

"Hey!" The Beta yelled at me, "Get back to work!"

I wanted to curse him, I wanted to punch and kick and avenge the death of my only friend. I wanted to fling this shovel at him or grab it and stab - I bowed my head and turned away. 

There was no way I could do it. No way I could defy them. I shook at the very thought. I yanked at a strong weed, my anger tearing its roots from the ground.

My wolf wouldn't​ help me defy them either. She had left me. My first shift was my last. She spoke only rarely - I could count our contact on one hand.
She was there, I'm certain of it, but yet she refused. She does lend me her strength...sometimes, usually when I was at death's door.

At death's door I knocked often.

I don't even think I am able to shift. I feared I was too weak to survive the process. Food was a rarity at eighteen I received no more food then when I was eight. They don't want me. I knew that, but it plagued me every day - could I have done better? Maybe if I was stronger they would accept me? Maybe if I was prettier?

A scream pierced the air and I jerked, dropping the shovel from my hand. I sat back, holding a hand to my pounding heart. I hoped they were not going to hurt them too badly. They were innocent. But I guess by now I know hope is futile. Hope is useless. They would be tortured and the truth would always be ugly.

The back door swung open and I fumbled for the shovel, quickly returning to work.

"Did you hear?" Jonathon said to James excitedly, "They caught the Luna, Dad's going to try and get information."

"Using what methods?"

"The usual," he replied nonchalantly, as if torture was an everyday topic. I gripped the shovel tighter in anger.

"The pack were weak," James observed, "not many even gave a fight,"

They walked past where I was working.

"I'm not surprised, isn't it the place where the runt's father is from?" Jonathon said, coming to a halt near me. I suspected it was deliberate.

"Yeah, I heard Dad got real pleasure in ripping his heart out."

That hurt. I tried to stifle a sob, but it slipped out anyway. Even if I had never met my father it pained me to think that he had died that way. No-one deserved such a barbaric ending. I hated crying at this moment, especially for a man I never knew.

"Aw," James crowed, I knew his eyes were on me, "Did I make the runt upset?"

I gritted my teeth.

"Look at us when we are talking to you!" Jonathon snarled and my head whipped up on instinct to glare at the two nineteen year olds. They were acting like they were five.

"Why are you crying? Is it because your pathetic father died? I wouldn't worry, you didn't mean anything to him either."

I glared at them with more hatred, I was seething and he should pay - James slapped me on the cheek. The pain blossomed as I came to my senses. The fear forced my head down again in submission. Don't look up, don't speak, wait, do what they say...

"Did I give you permission to look me in the eye?" he snarled. I shook my head, refusing to look up from the ground.

"No, sir."

"Good." He said and walked off with his twin, quickly bored of my torment. My fingers felt sore as I dug into the dirt once more but now I had a resolution.

I was never going to be allowed to leave pack lands - I was going to serve them forever. The fear would never leave. I was never going to be worthy of a mate. I was too weak. God, I even hated touch. I was going to live my life alone.

There was nothing stopping me from the suicidal plan I derived.

**

I tiptoed silently down the dirty, cold concrete steps, holding my breath as I slipped past the sleeping guards. They always fell asleep at 3am, unfailingly, each night. They were lucky I never told the Alpha about that. Of course I would never wish any harm to anyone. Even if they had hurt me, then again, who hadn't? I deserved it after all.

Curious eyes latched onto mine as I silently put a finger to my lips to tell them to be quiet. The young woman I caught eyes with earlier, who seemed to emanate Luna vibes, immediately awoke and silenced everyone in the room. They watched me with baited breath as I crept towards the rusting padlock and twisted the keys in the lock. My heart was hammering painfully through my chest, I was going to die for this.

But this is what Maple would have done. She would want me to do this.

I want to do this.

I knew better than anyone how awful it got down here.

The door creaked open ominously, my breathing hitched but the guards stayed asleep. The presumed Luna jerked her head towards the silver chains silently eating away at her wrists, I nodded and made quick work of the chains. The burning pain didn't faze me for a second, my skin too accustomed to the sensation. I had bracelet scares to prove it.

Once she was free, she picked up a small child next to her and whispered a thank you to me. I nodded and moved on to free the others.

Soon they were all standing and staring at me, I was intimidated by the sudden responsibility and felt the verges of panic. No, I resisted the fear, for once trusting people wont hurt me. Stealing courage, I led them to the back door entrance and let them go.

They crept away silently before dashing straight into the trees, towards what I hoped was safety.

I stood out on the empty field and lifted my eyes to the stars - this would be the last time I saw them.

I would be dead by tomorrow night.

I found I didn't even care.