Lone Werewolf

Hurt

"Hey,
I wanted everything I never had
Like the love that comes with light
I wore envy and I hated that" - Sia, Alive

But I survived.

The library was amazing, bookcases lined every wall, there were books shoved into every nook and cranny. The room was vast but there was a massive fireplace designed to make each reader feel cosy and safe, or at least that's what I imagined it did. For now it was full of dull ash and the room felt cold, the atmosphere one of spooky calm.

It felt forbidden and abandoned. Indicating that I was probably not supposed to be in here. I was going to get in trouble, like always.

"Hello, are you alright?" Someone asked and I shrieked, abruptly spinning around to the face the intruder. She looked like a friendly woman, with glasses hanging around her neck and a big poufy afro. Still, I kept my head bowed in submission. I was beneath all members of the pack.

"I'm sorry, Miss. I shouldn't be in here." I said quietly, waiting for a punch or a slap. She did neither.

"Now why shouldn't you be in here? You like books?" She asked. I looked up a fraction, before dropping my eyes again. When would she punish me for finding me here?

"I like them, Miss." I replied.

"Then there is no reason for you not to be here. The library is always open to pack members who enjoy reading. Is there any particular book you came here for? I can take you to the children's section if you'd like?"

"I'd like that very much, Miss." I answered politely, still frightened of being reprimanded and confused that I haven't been already.

"Oh no, darling. You can call me Maple. Now, follow me."

I followed her towards a section to the right corner of the room, lit by bay windows looking out onto the woods. We stopped at an area surrounded by plush pillows and brightly coloured picture books. It looked nice and friendly.

"You can pick anyone you like." She offered. I was uncertain, surely she would take away any book I liked? The Alpha always did that to my things. 

"Go ahead," she encouraged me with a smile. I blinked. No one had ever smiled at me before. I wasn't sure if I liked it.

"What's stopping you?" she pressed and suddenly I felt obliged to go, so I did. I went over to the shelf and frowned at the symbols running down the sides. They made no sense. Fear began to creep in, although it never really left. I thought reading books would be simple, just like talking, after all didn't the Alpha talk out loud from these books? I picked out a random purple book.

"Oh." Maple exclaimed, "That book's a little too young for you I would've thought."

"Oh, okay." I said quietly, almost paralyzed with anxiety for my punishment. I put it back quickly, feeling stupid and embarrassed. She gave me an odd look and I shrank away, quivering with fear. My heart sped up, the feeling similar and strangely comforting. I knew it was a stupid idea to come here.

"Darling, can you read?" she asked gently, kneeling down in front of me to be on my level. I blushed and looked at my hands, which shook with her proximity. She was too close. I didn't like it.

"No..." I mumbled, embarrassed. She would scold me for my stupidity or give me a well earned slap.

"Do you go to school?"

"No." I replied, ashamed at myself. All nine year old's should be able to read. She frowned.

"Do you get taught at home?" she asked, sounding concerned.