First and Ten

Chapter 12

                                                              Jax

I spent the whole ride home thinking about that last smile Blair gave me. She was so damn beautiful. I missed her more and more each day when she wasn't with me. I keep finding myself wishing she was there when I get home and wanting to wake up next to her each morning. Surely I was losing my mind, but I was enjoying it. I had started to realize that I could see myself with Blair for the long haul. Maybe it was just the newness of the relationship, and all those feelings might change whenever we had our first fight or showed a quirk that the other didn't like. I hadn't seen any part of Blair that I didn't like though. She does get a little insecure at times, but I understand the reasoning behind it. There was no way I would hurt her the way she had been in the past, and I would never be able to comprehend how that asshole hadn't seen what a gift he had in her.

When I pulled into my apartment, I was roused from my thoughts as I saw an unexpected guest waiting for me in the parking garage. I let out a breath and a not quiet "Fuck" before getting out of my car. "What are you doing here, Camila?"

"I thought we could get a jump on benefit planning. I had some free time after a dinner, so here I am."

"And you decided to just show up at my apartment instead of calling or texting? How did you come to the conclusion that would be okay? What if Blair had been with me?"

"Jax, what are you even doing with her? She is not a part of our world and does not understand the life that we lead. She never will. She is not for you. I will play nice with her as our employee, but do not ask me to treat her as your girlfriend when you and I both know that it will never work."

"You don't know anything about our relationship. Blair makes me happy. She is not an employee, and if you call her that again, we are going to have a problem. You can and will respect her as my girlfriend which is why we will not be going into my apartment together tonight or any other day or night. Blair and I will see you at the coffee shop in the morning. Goodnight, Camila."

She grabbed my arm as I went to walk past her and looked at me with disappointment in her big, brown eyes, but it made no impact on me. Camila and I had our time, and it didn't work. I've moved on, and she needed to do the same. "It's not going to happen, Camila. We had some good times together, but that's over. We don't work."

"We can, Jax. Why do you think I came back to Nashville instead of being in New York, L.A., or Paris? I came back for you because I realized that you were more important than any photoshoot or runway. We talked about making a life together here and in California with Leena during the offseason. Are you really going to throw all that away for some girl you just met?"

"And just what exactly made you suddenly realize that I was worth it?"

"Every single moment that we have been apart I kept wanting to turn around and tell you that I love you or have you try something off my plate at a new restaurant. I have missed having your strong arms around me on the red carpet and you naked beside me in bed. I love you, Jax, and you love me too. A love like that does not go away that quickly."

She put her hands on my chest and leaned in like she was going to kiss me, but I took her hands and removed them taking a step back.

"One kiss, Jax. If you feel nothing, I will stop, but I think we both know that you still care for me."

I stared at her full, pouty lips, her perfectly shaped five foot ten inch body that held a luminescent, golden tan all year round, her fall of shimmering brown hair that always felt like silk between my fingers and thought about what it had felt like to be with her. We had history together and had planned a future that included Leena, but Camila also wanted children of her own sooner rather than later. Wait a fucking minute! I screamed in my head. I couldn't believe I was actually thinking about that when I just left Blair not twenty minutes ago.