Intricate: The Beginning of Us| MARKNOMINHYUCK(bxbxbxb)

37: Some things worth trying

Mark

I watch Jaemin stare at someone else. I didn't feel horrible over it. At least not for the expected reason, not because of jealousy. I feel horrible because I haven't told him what I know. It was my chance to do it on Saturday, or rather Sunday when he called me at midnight and we met up. I was determined to tell him then but then he told me everything and we became engulfed in that one topic that I forgot about what I had to tell him.

I glance at Jaemin. 

It wasn't subtle anymore; the way he looks at Donghyuck and then his eyes snap to the other side of the cafeteria just to look at Jeno for an equal amount of time. Of course, I got my turn too. He would turn and give me a kiss on the cheek, sometimes a peck on the lips, or he would just lean into me.

I have been coming to terms with the fact that I would have to share this affection. Honestly, I don't mind it much anymore. Not while knowing that one of the other people would be Donghyuck. 

Jeno... I still need time. A lot.

I can imagine being with Donghyuck, if I'm honest. He's just... how should I word it... loveable? That's probably it. 

On the other hand, Jeno is someone that I have come to strongly dislike over the years. Someone who I just wanna punch any time he comes near but for Jaemin, I'm willing to try to get along with him. I mean, there has to be a reason why Jaemin likes him. I'm sure that reason is not that he is completely an asshole, I would hope anyway. I believe there's good inside everyone. Who's to say that Jeno is an exception?

"Mark-Hyung," I feel a nudge on my side, instantly snapping me out of my daze. I blink my eyes, removing the cloudiness in them before turning to give my full attention to the boy beside me. 

"Yes?" I ask, giving him a grin.

He glances at Jeno before looking back at me. "Why were you staring at him?" He questions, utter confusion on his face, his eyebrows furrowed and lips pursed together. He looks nervous. Like he's worried I figured it out. This was another chance. I can just come clean and tell him what I had learned that Wednesday.

"I uh just blanked out for a while. I hadn't realized," I let out a small laugh. 

Just when he's about to open his mouth, the bell rings and I let out a small sigh, hoping that he hadn't heard it. If he did, he didn't say anything since he simply stands up from where he was sitting and turns to give me a wide smile. 

"I'll see you later," he says, leaning in to give me a kiss on the cheek. 

I nod, returning the gesture before watching him walk away with Renjun's arm wrapped around his shoulder. It was a little comical considering that the Chinese boy was shorter but if he were to ask, I never said that. 

I sigh before grabbing my backpack, putting it on me, then walking away. For the most part, there was no one else in the cafeteria though I noticed that Jeno had stayed behind, sitting nonchalantly in the corner, a bored expression on his face. I contemplate walking up to him and exchanging pleasantries before deciding otherwise. I was set on making amends with him but I have the feeling he would not feel the same and I would like to not start my day with a fight.

With that being said, I walk out of the cafeteria and to my classroom.

Donghyuck

"I'm sorry," I say to the male in front of me, looking down at my feet. I was embarrassed and felt pathetic and like a whiny, needy child. I still couldn't believe what I had done Friday. My ears were definitely burning up and my stomach was swirling with nerves.

"Why?" He asks in a stoic tone, letting out a slight sigh after.

"About Friday... I was out of my mind." I huff, running a hand through my hair which was soon stopped by him. With wide eyes, they snap up to look at him. "W- what are you doing?" I yelp when he pulls me closer.

"I... I think you were right." He simply says, looking deeply into my eyes, making me self-aware.  I hated the feeling. 

"About what?" I question, feeling a little more composed.

"I need a distraction." He lets go of my hand, takes a step back, and then looks to the right. "I," he sighs, "I keep thinking about her. Not because I love her or because I still like her but because the things she said, the things she made me do still haunt me and I need to get them out of my head," he finishes off in a frustrated tone. He turns his head to make eye contact with me, looking me dead in the eyes. "So I'm willing. You'll use me and I'll use you. I think that's fair and it's only easier since you're offering."

I glance around the back of the school. It was dirty and it smelled of trash and shit but it was the one place where we can have been alone, uninterrupted. I couldn't set my eyes on him, or anything else for that matter, so they kept darting around everywhere nervously. "What happened to you not being homo?" I try to joke.

"I guess there are some things worth trying."

I look at him, we look at each other for a while until I let a smile slip. I nod at him and he nods back, no smile but also no frown, I take it as a good sign.

Letting out a shaky breath, I take a step forward. Then, I hesitantly put one of my hands on one of his cheeks. I dart my eyes from his lips to his eyes. He wasn't pulling away. Instead, he puts his hands on my waist and pulls me close. He nods in reassurance and then, I seal our lips together. 

A/N: Did I procrastinate writing this because of watching Dream's concert clips? Obviouslyyy 🙄

Okay but seriously, I got out of school early because of the rain here and I WAS gonna do it earlier but then I watched a show with my sister then I was like 'I'll just see if there's anything on youtube. like just a quick check pfft what can happen, I won't get distracted' ... yeah, no, the first thing that showed up was the 'my first and last' performance, and even though I have already watched it twenty times, I WATCHED IT AGAIN and then the txt x enhypen legend of kpop stage collab was there and I JUST HAD TO WATCH IT and then... ya know distractions 😭😭