Intricate: The Beginning of Us| MARKNOMINHYUCK(bxbxbxb)

4: Family (Comfort)

Jaemin

Along the way home, some tears unintentionally slipped out of my eyes and I let them out without caring. The streets were generally empty either way so I decided that it was okay to look vulnerable.

I felt the need to clear my mind at the moment which led me to walk home slowly. As soon as I arrived, I dropped my bag next to the door as I took my shoes off, catching my mother's attention. She quickly peeked her head out of her room which was straight ahead from the front door. Her eyebrows furrowed as soon as she saw my face which without a doubt was probably puffy with tear stains.

"Honey, what's wrong?" She questions worriedly as she walks straight towards me.

I look down at the shoe rack, not spotting my brother's shoes there. I took note of that as I attempted to walk away from her, ignoring her in the process. She didn't allow this, however, as she grabs onto my forearm in a strong grasp. She studied my face as any mother would with that knowing expression. She did that for some seconds as I made no attempt to run away. As soon as she was done analyzing me, she pulls me into a hug.

I gave up then, emptying the tears which I thought weren't left. I sob into her shoulder as loud as I could, releasing the emotions I thought I never would. She rubbed my back soothingly making me calm down slightly as I realized this was one of the things that I needed--my mother's comforting warmth.

"Honey, tell me what's wrong," she says softly. I shake my head on her shoulder, unable to get any words out though my crying had subsided by now. I felt her nod. "Okay, go take a shower and relax. I'll bring dinner to you in a little, okay?"

I nod weakly at her. She tightens the hug for a second as if to assure me that it'll all be okay before she lets go of me, letting me walk away and to the restroom.

Once stripped out of my clothes, I step into the shower, pushing the curtains close. I open the faucet, letting the water run freely all through my skin. Ice, cold water which I hoped would take all thoughts away. It did, momentarily. I focused on the water and every drop of it that ran down my skin. I don't know how long it must've been before I heard a knock on the door, my brother's voice following.

"Jaem, you've been there for long. Are you okay?" He questions worriedly, bringing me back to my senses.

'It must be six by now,' I concluded as it was the time that he usually got back from work.

"I," I clear my throat after being surprised by my voice's raspiness. "I'm okay, Hyung. I'll be done in ten," I finally responded as I turned the water to lukewarm.

From then on, I quickly put shampoo on my hair and soap on my body, quickly washing it all off. I closed the faucet off and wrapped a towel around me before stepping out of the room after realizing I forgot to bring any clothes in.

After taking some clothes out from my drawers, I was slow to put the random sweats and t-shirt on. I look around my room as I slide the gray shirt through my head. I noticed how everything was out of place. I am out of place. My mind is a hurricane, turning full-on 180s with the same thoughts. People usually describe me as someone bright and confident, quite the opposite of who I truly am but a couple of days back, I would continue with that act but at the moment I just felt like shit and couldn't find it in me to even pretend that I was okay. Because I'm not.

I feel extremely dramatic. Why should I become this way over some boys I haven't even ever talked to? Well, I have, but that just started yesterday.

My endless cycle of repetitive thoughts was interrupted by a knock on my door. I abruptly turn my head over to it just to see my mother peeking in just like before, a cup of orange juice and a plate with tteokbokki on each of her hands. She gives me a warm, kind smile which I do my best to return as I take a seat at the edge of my bed. She soon walks in, putting the things in her hand on the bedside table.

"Can you talk to me?" She asks softly as she takes ahold of both of my hands in hers as she sits on the chair which was previously by my desk and she moved to be in front of me.

I take a few seconds to relax on her hold, thinking everything through before nodding at her in response. Just as I part my lips, about to say something, a knock comes from my opened door. We both turn out heads simultaneously at the door where we spotted my brother, a soft and worried expression on his face.

"Can I come in?" He asks cautiously. I nod at him slowly, which results in him walking in and taking a sit on my other side on my bed.

Mom lets go of one of my hands which Jaehyun-Hyung takes it comfortingly as I adjust myself to sit in the middle of the bed, my back against the headboard.

I rest my head on my brother's shoulder, closing my eyes as more tears form. This time, they weren't from sadness but rather from the comfort and support I was feeling before I even got the chance to open up. Both of them knew I have something to say and instead of forcing it out of me, they took my hand, calmed me, and waited for me to be ready to talk and I think that I am now. They have always been like this, I recall. They are my family and this is what I truly needed, I concluded. They wouldn't judge me, they were gonna be here for me and comfort me.

With those final thoughts, I finally began to tell them how I felt; How I fell for three different guys at the same time. How I want to date those three guys.

"I- I like guys," I stutter out after a few seconds, tightening the grip on both of their hands, my eyes closed as my head was still on my brother's shoulder and now my mother sitting on my other side on the bed.

They glanced at each other. "We know that honey," my mom replies as she begins to rub her hand on my back.

"No, I- mean," I open my eyes and look between them both. "I like more than one guy," I say shakily, some tears came out of my eyes and I have no idea why. "As in I wanna date more than one person."

"Oh," was all my mom was able to breathe out, probably from the shock and I didn't blame her for it.

Jaehyun then took over, "Jaemin, you know that we support you," he said with a smile. "It's just a bit of a shock," he continues as he glances at our mom who was still frozen. "You know that it can be difficult right?"

I nod, "I understand it, a lot," I respond dryly, looking down at my lap as he tightly hugs me.