Dépaysement (h.s)

57

"I assume you still work for him." She asks and I nod with my lips in a line.

I lean forward, "Alright enough of the chit chat. I'm here for a reason, and it's not to catch up." A hint of sadness washes over her face and she doesn't bother wiping it off.

"Okay, so why are you here? Seemed as though you didn't ever want to see me especially after last night."

"Because I didn't. I really shouldn't even be here right now. But I need to know something."

"Alright, anything." She uncrosses her legs and clasps her hands together on her knees, matching me.

"Why me?"

Her lips part—her eyes stop looking into mine, going to the floor instead. "I don't think I have an answer for you."

I shake my head—refusing that to be her answer, "There must have been a reason. Why did you choose me? Did Luca force you or did you do it willingly?"

She closes her eyes and drops her head, "I didn't know you. I thought it would be easy money, I was good looking and I had a flirtatious personality. I knew you would fall for me, as would any other guy had it not been you." Her voice cracks after every word like she's trying not to cry.

"But what causes someone to do that to somebody? Quinn, you fucking lied to me the whole time. It was all a game for you. How do you not feel anything?"

She lifts her head and her glossy eyes tear into mine, "I hate myself for what I did. I wake up regretting it, I go to sleep regretting it. There's not a day that goes by where I don't think about you or what I did to you. There's no words I can say to make up for what I did, which is why I didn't bother back then. I was angry at myself and couldn't face you anymore. That's why I left and didn't take any of the money."

My eyes widen, "Wait, you didn't keep the money?"

A tear falls onto her face, "How could I? I truly did love you, Harry. In the beginning, Luca and I made a deal that I would make you fall in love with me and break your heart, leave and take the money. But what wasn't planned was that I fell in love with you way before you did me. I told Luca so many times that I wanted out, I refused to continue his game. But he threatened me, you and my family. I had to continue on. There was so many times I wanted to just tell you about it and beg for your forgiveness and we would move on from it and lie to Luca but I knew that would never happen."

My eyes start to get blurry so I blink repeatedly to rid of it, "You should've told me. Things would have ended differently. But you didn't and neither of us can take any of that back."

She nods, "I know. And trust me, I wish I could. Seeing you last night made me think about the damage I caused to not only you but all of the guys as well. We became friends, they trusted me. Not only did I hurt you but I know I hurt them too and I will never forgive myself."

"How did Luca even find you? Did you work with him the whole time or was it some fucking craigslist ad as a cry for money?" I know I sound harsh, but I just need to know.

"No I didn't know who he was or what he was affiliated with until halfway through. My father was in debt and owed him so I offered to help my father in any way I could or else we would've lost our house. I met with Luca behind my father's back and asked what I could to do give him any amount I could, and that's when he told me what he wanted."