fall again

chapter twenty five

There are moments where you thought it'd be the end of everything, the end of what you once had but then you realize it happened a lot of times already that it doesn't seem too anxious for you anymore. How many times has Karina included herself in an accident but didn't die? More than she could ever count.

She always escaped her death but what happened to hear recently was something she never thought she'd be able to survive. Am I talking about the incident? No. I'm talking about her doubting Winter's love.

Love. Love was something Karina never felt growing up. She might have had a luxurious life but all she had ever known to live with was misery and her troubled mind. And when Kim Minjeong asked her out on a date, she suddenly knew what love felt like.

It was Kim Minjeong who showed her that life was indeed worth-living, that when you live for someone, everything just magically fades away. All you could ever think is that person. It was Kim Minjeong who showed her that home was never a place, it was a feeling. A feeling for warmth of comfort. It was Kim Minjeong who showed her the beauty about running away with the person you love and it was Kim Minjeong who changed her life. She colored it with her existence. Karina's once dull world was filled with Minjeong. The joy of having Kim Minjeong by her side.

Yet it was her who broke it. It was Kim Minjeong that ruined her. Ironic how it was the younger who somehow made Karina's life into a magical fairytale yet she was the one who ruined it for the older.

I guess love really does ruin us.

But even if so, Karina never doubted Minjeong. Even when she found out about her and Minju, she always believed that Minjeong loved her. Maybe not more than she ever loved Minju but atleast she loved her right? Atleast.

But after that incident, after those words kept on echoing through her head, she doubted Minjeong's feelings. She doubted if all she said was true. This doubt kept on hurting Karina but she didn't want to jump into conclusions.

Winter loves me, right?

Those were her thoughts when she woke up. How miserable can you get for you to end up thinking about your lover's feelings the moment you open your eyes? Very miserable, I'd say.

A screaming voice was what Karina woke up to when she finally gained conciousness. It was an Angry and yelling Winter with Mrs. Kim in front of her perfectly mirroring her daughter's expressions. Karina couldn't get a hold of what they were talking about.

"She's awake!" She didn't know that there was someone beside her. If the younger sister knew then she would've slept more. "Irene?" She managed to say even with her weak state. She felt someone stroking her hair and she instantly knew that it wasn't Irene.

The moment the older sister told everyone that Karina was finally awake, Winter used her speed and got to where Karina was sleeping and carefully stroked her hair. "Winter," Karina said softly and Winter started to cry. "Yes, love. It's me. I'm glad you're alright." She said between sobs and sniffs.

Whenever Karina was there, Winter couldn't pay any attention to other things. Her mind belonged to Karina. With that being said, she didn't feel her mother glaring at her back, she didn't feel Irene and Seulgi's sympathetic stares, she didn't feel it at all. All she felt was relief now that her lover was okay.

"Can I talk to you, privately?" Karina asked. Winter hesitated to answer because she knew where this was going to lead them. She stayed quiet but the silence was broken by Karina pleading to talk to her so she asked for everyone to leave. Seulgi patted her on the back before leaving the room.

"I'm starting to think that you're only forcing yourself to stay here because you don't want to hurt me. I'm starting to think that you're only here because to you this is an obligation you should fulfill. Don't get me wrong, Win. I know you love me but this love of ours has ruined us both."