43 | Joie

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Everything was fine with me

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Everything was fine with me. With the baby. Healthy. I should've known going to that family reunion would turn my life upside down somehow. Getting pregnant by Kut, again, was a huge one. Wanting a baby was never in my life plans. Sophomore year of college definitely wasn't the correct time for me. Honestly, after a while I thought I couldn't have kids, assuming the abortion ruined me. But leave it to God to surprise me.


The way I was raised had me terrified of becoming a mother to another human being. Tanika and Joel damaged me. But I'm not them. I have proven that long ago. I had the quick thought of sneaking behind Kut's back again to get an abortion, but something changed. Having a few days to think, I actually believe this could be what I need. The difference between now and then, I'm more than financially stable to care for a child. I do it for Gunner and Misty. I achieved it with Aqua, and I was struggling worse then.


I'm not Joel or Tanika.


I'm better, and despite who I share this baby with, I refuse to harm what's growing inside me because of my doubt and love-hate for Kut.


The elevator music played, slowly riding down for the hospital's lobby. I had on a Nike oversize, short sleeve top and Nike jersey shorts. The elevator stopped, releasing a ding for the lobby floor. I was about to walk off, but the hand clasping around my wrist stopped me and made me look back, Kyan gesturing me back.


Kut had on all black, the only color coming from his green silk Fendi Blouson jacket. "We goin' down to the parking garage."


"Why?" I inquired. "I parked in the parking lot."


The raise of his brow, made me walk backward and kill the questioning and rode down to the parking garage with him. His trusted driver Emiliano waited outside customized Rolls Royce. "Where are we going? My car's here."


"I'll bring you back.." Kut assured, waiting for me to get in.


With an eye roll, I slid in the leather interior and Kut followed. Emiliano drove the Rolls out the parking garage, and even though the sun was out, the 5% tint made it dark and cozy inside here. But it was hot. Outside and in here summer weather in full affect.


"Are you not hot?" I blurted, irritation lacing my tone. "It's fucking hot in here. At least have your air on if you want me to ride with you."


Kut chuckled softly and pressed the button near him. "Cut on the air for me, Emiliano."


Soon air was blowing out the vents and I happened to sigh in relief. "Thank you."


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