seven .ೃ࿐

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I have never wanted to stay in bed and deny the day more. And it's not because I'm laying next to the woman I love. 

It's because I'm putting off that conversation about the phone call I picked up last night. I couldn't shake the way the woman sounded on the other end, so sultry and dripping with seductiveness. She was so confident, almost like this happened often enough she didn't need to worry about being caught. 

I felt a lurch in my stomach. Surely, I was going to be sick. I didn't think it was from all the drinks I'd had either. 

Gina stirred beside me, her body feeling heavy beside mine. She was radiating so much warmth, yet I didn't feel any at all. 

"Good morning, baby," she mumbled, looking over at me. 

I offered her a tight smile. "Good morning."

She raised a brow at me. "Hungover?"

I offered yet again a grim smile. "Something like that,"

Call me selfish, but I wanted so badly to open the curtains and have the broad daylight shine onto Gina to give her a scorching headache. Yeah, maybe I should hear her out first. Maybe she had to flirt with a client to get the deal to work...even though that wouldn't be much better. 

I threw the sheets off of me and climbed out of bed, making my way to the kitchen. I popped a Tylenol into my mouth after eating a slice of toast and watered it all down with some orange juice. 

Gina was still in bed, I could hear her subtle groans as she moved around, attempting to collect herself and beat her hangover before it beat her. 

When she finally made it out of bed, I heard her padding toward where I stood against the counter in the kitchen. 

"Good sleep?" She asked me, pouring herself a glass of water. 

I gave her a gentle nod, as I fought off the urge to chew the inside of my lip. 

My anxiety was playing a game and I knew it. I had to mentally cuss at myself in hopes of keeping it together before I could confront her. I didn't want to seem weak and break down in tears. 

My palms were sweating and my heart was pounding, causing my head to spin, in the most disgusting way. I tried to take deep breaths and fight back pathetic, over-assuming tears threatening to escape. 

I moved around Gina and went to sit at the island chair. I knew I'd need a sturdy surface to lean on. 

"So, G," I began. "Do you have any important meetings today?"

Gina made eye contact with me as she sipped her water. When she lowered the glass she replied; "No, why? Did you want to do something? I'm kind of hung over, but, we could try."

I shook my head. "No, I was just wondering."

Gina raised a brow at me and put down her glass. "If this is you going on about the possibility of me cheating once again, seriously, Adalyn, I already told you all there is to know. Which is absolutely nothing, seeing as I'm not cheating."

I opened my mouth to speak, almost stopping myself. But I knew I deserved the truth. "I know about the other woman." 

Gina frowned then, hard, then opened her mouth to cut me off.

"I answered your phone last night at some God awful time," I started shakily. "She called you baby. She asked you to come over." 

I didn't pause to glance at her, knowing I'd break down in tears. My stomach was rolling in all directions, and it was making me even more anxious than I was before. My palms were shaky and I kept wiping sweat off of them onto my legs.

"Fuck, Adalyn," She was shaking her head now, burying it in her palms. 

"You lied to me," I said, almost in realization. I let the words surround us. "You lied to me. I believed you. I fucking believed you." 

When I made eye contact with her, my gut swirled and clenched in an uncomfortable motion. I could feel her lies now, seeping into me as if she wanted to gloat in all the things she's gotten away with. 

"How long has this been going on?" I dared her to answer. 

"Adalyn, I-" 

"How long," I repeated, more firmly than before. 

"Two months," she sighed in defeat. 

I slammed my hands on the counter, she jumped. "What the fuck, Gina! You lied to me! How many times did you slip away, leaving me to think that you really had important things going on? Why didn't you just fucking leave me to begin with? If you weren't interested, why the fuck would you stay?"

Gina laughed humorlessly. "What was I supposed to tell you? This doesn't mean I don't love you, babe! I slipped a few times, I was going to stop. I swear! I'm sorry, okay? It was harmless flirting, really."

"I didn't realize that your definition of 'harmless flirting' was cheating on me. Do I need to get tested for STDs now?" 

I believed her. That wasn't the worst part. The worst part is, she allowed me to believe her. She established a trust, something that I was supposed to be able to lean on, to feel safe with. 

She's crying now, rubbing her eyes and sniffling softly. "I'm sorry, Adalyn. I'm really sorry. It was harmless, in the beginning. One thing lead to another and I don't know how to explain it. But that was the end of it, I swear. I told her we couldn't do it anymore." 

I shook my head.

I pushed away from the island and off my chair, the room was spinning and I couldn't grasp anything properly. My stomach lurched as I stumbled down the hall toward the bathroom. 

I've been cheated on. My girlfriend, lied to me, comforted me, all while sneaking behind my back to be with somebody else. Was I not good enough for her? What was I doing wrong?

I closed my eyes and wiped my palms on my thighs once more. My chest was tight and my anxiety had spiraled. 

Gina's calls for me from kitchen seemed so far away, almost as if she were on a different universe. 

I leaned forward over the toilet and almost laughed as I felt my stomach lurch again. So much for that fucking Tylenol. 

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