PSYCHO - JOHN MURPHY

30. Mines

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HER LUNGS ARE ON FIRE. Violently coughing and spluttering does little to resolve it, and the pounding in her head is worse with every movement. Caspian's voice grates on Ainsley's ears. Of course; he would be complaining. He's always complaining. She scoffs a little, after all, how dare he give orders if she didn't wake they'd just leave her? He isn't the leader. Ainsley scrambles to her feet with help from John, shooting Caspian a glare that could rival Indra's. Caspian falters, and stumbles backwards a little.

"I don't know what your problem is," Ainsley grinds out, despite the throbbing in her brain. "But I will finish it if you don't shut your mouth for five minutes."

John whistles. "That's my girl."

Ainsley finds herself nearly faltering at the sentence. Her heart flutters for the first time since the dropship, but instead of showcasing the very obvious lapse, she glances off towards the distance. How could he gain such a reaction from her? Ainsley doesn't even know. However, John notices. He notices everything when it comes to her, no matter how hard she tries to hide it.

He notices her deny their chemistry time and time again, no matter how close they've gotten. He notices the way her eyebrows furrow whenever she's on the verge of becoming angry, or the way she bites her lip in concentration; even the way she toys with the hem of her clothing whenever she's anxious.

Ainsley clears her throat. "Right, well, I don't know about you, but I'm ready to blow this wasteland. She said due North."

"What is due North, Ainsley?" Jaha questions, though he appears as if he'd rather someone else have the answer to his question. Oh well.

"Oh, I dunno," Ainsley mutters with an eye roll. "What have we just trekked however many miles for? Your city of light."

"Did she say that?" Demands Caspian.

"Doesn't matter," John says from beside her, moving out to face Jaha. "You preach about faith, well then have faith in her -" he gestures towards Ainsley.

Jaha ponders this, despite Caspian insisting they turn back; he points towards the North Star and gestures for them to lead the way. Ainsley can't help but grin. Surprise filters through her veins as she starts to walk, side by side with John; the only one on this godforsaken trek that believed in her.

Maybe she can be more than a criminal.

Maybe John was right.

Half in a daze, Ainsley intertwines her and John's fingers together. John sending her a soft smile in return.

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The desert is unlike anything Ainsley could describe, but she knows it brings a sense of exhaustion and a near delirium. They'd been trekking North for hours. They're still no closer to finding the damn City of Light than they were two days ago. Annoyance seems like a permanent emotion. Well, it doesn't help that Harris has decided to tell random jokes for the past two hours.

To be fair, he isn't as bad as Caspian's complaining, and if she's completely honest she's joined in with her own jokes occasionally.

"A grounder and a reaper walk into a bar," Harris starts. "The bartender looks to the grounder, he says, 'we don't serve your kind around here.' The reaper gets up and leaves." Harris chuckles loudly at his own joke, before explaining, "get it? Reapers eat grounders."

"I will take Jaha's staff and beat you with it," John says in annoyance, getting fed up with the corny jokes.

Jaha reprimands him, but John ignores it; however, he does turn in surprise at Ainsley's sudden bout of laughter. A sound that surprised all of them. She rarely laughs, and for it to be over a damn corny joke, well they all assume delirium.

"Oooh, tell another, Harris!" Ainsley grins tiredly at him. "Haven't laughed like that in.. I can't remember when."

"Okay," Harris readily agrees and for a moment it's like the two shared a sort of companionship. "Uh, an arker, a grounder, and a mountain man walk into a bar. Arker says 'I'll take some moonshine,' the grounder says 'I'll take some, too,' the mountain man, he says -"

Ainsley has to bite back a scream. Harris and a few others explode right there in front of her face, coating hers with their blood. John throws his body on top of Ainsley's in an effort to shield her. Protect her. Her breathing grows heavy. Harris' body had exploded into tiny pieces, literally exploded, and her ears wouldn't stop ringing from the blast.

"Nobody move!" Jaha shouts, his voice distorted like a broken television. "We're in the middle of a minefield!"

Dead.

Ainsley's eyes drop towards where Harris had once stood.

Dead.

Her breathing becomes frantic, damn near hyperventilating.

Dead.

He was right there, and now he's gone. Gone. He'd never tell another dumb joke again. His blood coating their faces, touching hers, and she can't even find fascination with their deaths. Ainsley feels sick. She can barely register John's arms around her, holding her close. She could barely feel anything at all.

AUTHORS NOTE -

Short chapter, but I wanted to showcase Ainsley's slight character development. Before, she would have reveled at the blood bath, but during this trek she's been more vulnerable than she would like, so I think Harris' dumb jokes would have won her over. So to have him die, she would be upset without actually knowing why she was upset.

When in actuality, shes upset bc it brings home the fact that everywhere she goes, death follows her.

Written: March 9, 2021.
Edited: November 28, 2023.