Animal

47

THIRD PERSON

Seungcheol took a deep breath before entering the funeral again. With his bloodstained hands that Woozi failed to notice, he held his phone and scanned for his captured moments a while ago. He filmed himself while chopping those suspects. He knows that it will be a cause of his own downfall once it got leaked. But he wants to give her an assurance that he already deleted those who violated her sister.

He saw her laying on the bench provided by the funeral venue, but what made his forehead crease was some blood droplets dripping down the bench.

His eyes widened after seeing Hope shakily detach something on her limbs and stab herself again. She cried loudly in pain she absorbed alone.

But she knows, everything she experienced ruined her the worst, this physical pain can't be measured with emotional damages she received throughout the years.

She had planned it even before Woozi comforted her well. But after that moment, it made her contemplate, does she really need to be hard for herself?

Woozi kept on saving her. But she can't save herself, she feels like a burden to everybody, especially to Woozi, and Seungcheol.

He ran towards her to see her closely. Her clothes are in crimson red colors now. She's stabbing herself with a stainless fork. Her crying eyes noticed Seungcheol, who can't move at the moment.

She sat up, disregarding the pain she felt on her stomach, "Choi Seungcheol,"

"Akin na 'yan," she managed to talk at him casually and tried to snatch the knife of his hand.

"H-hindi bumabaon ang tinidor na 'to," but in multiple stabs, she did to herself, she completely ruined her stomach. Some organs are cut and damaged.

"T-tama na," he stuttered.

Despite having difficulties, she let out a soft chuckle. "Umiiyak ka,"

She always see him smiling, getting angry, but never in her life, she could not imagine seeing Seungcheol cry in front of her. This completely means that she's an important person to him. She managed to let Seungcheol feel various emotions.

"Hindi ako imortal, Choi Seungcheol. Mamamatay rin ako, sa wakas," she grabbed his wrist and make him sit beside her.

"Sabi ko naman kasi, ang tagal ko nang request na patayin mo ako," she giggled.

"Dadalhin kita sa hospital, Hope hindi pa huli--" she shut him up by placing her index finger on his lips.

It went silent, when she noticed that his tears are falling again, she wiped them out with a smile.

She cupped his cheeks, his adam's apple moves as he continuously gulp. They are both trembling, one is dying, while the other fights for his exploding emotions.

"Sorry," she smiled at him. Subconsciously, her tears fell.

Nang i-alis niya ang kamay niya sa pisngi ni Seungcheol ay naiwan ang bakas ng kaniyang dugo. She tried to wipe them out by the back of her hand but it just got spread.

"Alam kong sinusubukan mo. Thank you kasi sinubukan mo," she smiled at him.

After that, she looked at the coffin in front of their seat. "Pero hindi ko na talaga kaya, Choi Seungcheol,"

"Sorry kung hindi ko kaya, sinasayang ko lang ang oras mo," she looked down on her ruined body because of the stabs she did to herself. She chuckled.

"Hindi kita kayang mahalin,"

"Choi Seungcheol, sorry. Hindi ko rin kasi alam kung paano ko mamahalin ang sarili ko," she looked at him worriedly, trying to filter her words so that Seungcheol will not get hurt.

But just seeing her killing herself makes Seungcheol feel hurt inside.

"Sa tuwing iniisip ko ang sarili ko, mapapalitan kaagad ng masamang mangyayari. Natatakot na ako. Ayaw kong dumating sa point na may mangyari ring masama sa'yo," she tried to explain. Seungcheol looked at her with desperate eyes.

"Ready ako--" she stopped him from talking by pecking a kiss on his lips.

She breathed heavily as she let go. Due to blood loss, she became weak. She leaned on his shoulder for support. "'Wag mo na akong iligtas, hayaan mo nalang akong ganito,"

"Kung saan ako masaya, kung saan maiisip ko ang sarili ko," she giggled and held his hand.

"Okay na 'to. First and last kiss kita, first and last date, first and last sex, first and last boyfriend, lahat na, pinilit kong umikot ang mundo ko sa'yo kasi akala ko maiisip ko na ang sarili ko kapag ginawa ko 'yon,"

"Choi Seungcheol, o Cherry, o kung sino ka mang katabi ko ngayon. Sorry ha, 'wag na nating pilitin, ayaw ko na," she sobbed as she squeeze his hands.

He gulped. Seungcheol wanted to do something to save her. He wanted the best for her, and he's convinced that living longer will not make her better.

That's what he wanted, her thinking about herself. But does he really like it to be this far?

Does he really want to lose another lady that he thought would be his lifetime partner?

But Hope already cleared it, she won't love Choi Seungcheol until the end.

"Sorry ha, susuko na ako," she cried more, she even held her stomach for something inside exploded. Her organs are about to pop out of her limbs.

She groaned in pain, but still managed to give him an assuring smile. Teary eyes, she leaned at his shoulder again.

"Choi Seungcheol,"

Those were her last words before having difficulties in breathing. After a while, she finally stopped trying.

She's still leaning on Seungcheol's shoulder but he failed to detect any signs of living. Her hands started to get loose, Seungcheol held it tighter. He shut his eyes closed and looked up to the ceiling just to prevent himself from crying so hard beside her lifeless body.

He wanted to be a shoulder to lean on for her, but not in this kind of situation where she doesn't breathe anymore.

He wanted to comfort her, but how can he do that thing if she already cut her life.

He should've stopped her from killing herself but he feels so stiff knowing that Hope really meant to end herself for a long time now.

If he was able to stop her if he will rush to the hospital now, will Hope be grateful?

He wiped his tears and slightly chuckled, "Pointless?"

He reminisces the time when he asked her if she would date him if he's a normal human.

"It's not pointless at all," he muttered and looked at the lady.

Her skin starts to be pale and the bench that they were sitting at are now wet because of her blood.

"Bakit ganito ka sa'kin? Mahal na mahal kita,"

He hugged the lifeless body of Hope, waiting for her to respond. "I love you, babe,"

He wasn't even able to hear her saying "I love you too,"