"Who would've thought that I'd be here by myself? Who would've thought about the cause and effects? Now you know, I'm just a man on a wire."
"Who would have thought I'd see you with someone else? Who would have thought that I'd be in such a mess? Ye...
Canada is such an amazing country. It's so diverse, multicultural and the people here made me attracted to it more.
But the thing that made me fall in love with this place, are the vast wide falls.
This country is known for it's vast spotted lakes and breathtaking falls. Well fitted for a person like me who is in the process of healing.
I started seeking helping with a professional psychologist right after we got here.
It's already been six months since I've declared healthy and since then, I've never been this soothe my entire life. I feel so great. My worries all gone.
Have I forgave my Dad? Yes, I did.
Pain is a word that most of us hate even to experience in life.
Pain is an everlasting feeling we won't be able to change even if we feel like, it will haunt us for the good or for the bad. The only way you defeat it is by getting stronger every day. It is to gain more advantages in the future so do not take everything to heart just learn from it.
Have I forgave myself? Yes, I did.
Truly this is exactly why there is so much hate in this world. Every single person on this earth is "damaged" and every single damaged person fails to realize that they are not alone.
But these past two years have made me realized the need to learn how to act out of love and compassion.
I've became free and healed.
Like I'm a new me.
I started looking around and still left in awe. Watching the maple leaves fall into the ground is giving me such magical vibes. It's so serene gaze at.
So romantic.
"Ji, come on! We're gonna be late!" I turned at my back and saw Bona waving her hands at me, hurrying me up.
I hopped my way to her and clutch on her waist as we both share our giggles. I met Bona when I was at my lowest.
She was my companion.
We share the same mind in everything. Like me, she also majored in Environmentalist Studies. We both love nature and all. In short, we do things a lot together and have a lot of things in common.
Like you know what they say, birds with the same feather flocks together.
"Are you ready?" She stated, having a big grin in her face.
I smiled back. As bright as hers. "Always."
And we started marching into the bridge.
Capillano Suspension Bridge, 70 meters high above and surrounded with big trees.
Bona and I are after the other end of the bridge.
The Capillano Park.
It becomes lit up with thousands of lights, like something from an enchanting fairy tale.
"Bona, I'm scared." I stated as I was holding tightly into the ropes both on each sides. My knees are trembling so hard as I tried not to look down.
Bona just giggled at my situation. "We've been hear last year, Ji. Why are you still scared?"
"Exactly, that was a year ago." I yelped. "And as far as I remember I'm still afraid of heights. It didn't change, you dimwit."
She puffed some air and teasingly roll her eyes.
Bona then extended her arms. "We'll run our way. We're almost there, come on!" I look at her hand.
I slowly let go of my grip to the ropes and hold her extended right hand tightly.
"Let's go!" Bona dashed towards the end while I screamed my lungs out, getting dragged.
As we reached our way to the other end, I sighed in relief.
"See, it's not that bad," She stated, looking down at me as I was holding both of my knees, crouching. I was panting so hard.
I glared at her to which she just let out a chuckle as an answer.
We hiked our way to the top and immediately filled with amazement.
"Wow," I uttered.
"Yeah," She stated, "Wow,"
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As I keep admiring the view, I suddenly remembered that night. My hand unconsciously reached for my neck, holding the necklace.
***
He smiled down at me. "It's a snow flower."
I stared at him back. With his tall and lean figure with that messy black hair and deep enchanting eyes stood in front of me. He was beaming his sweetest smile.
This is the man behind all those nostalgic that I'm feeling, those emotions I never knew I could feel again. I'm so grateful. Too grateful that I even question myself if I deserve all of this.
"Do you like it?" He chuckled and gave me a boyish smile.
My heart leaped with happiness. As the butterflies in my stomach abruptly flapping their wings. No, it's not butterflies anymore, he's already giving me the whole damn zoo.
"Like it? I love it!" I exclaimed.
"It's so pretty!" I asked as I looked down at the pendant again. "Why snow flower?"
"Snow Flower" represents my desire for joyfulness to rain down amidst our bleak situation." He stated. "You're my snow flower, Jisoo Kim."
***
The necklace that Taehyung gave me in our 100 days together. I softly smiled as I remember this day would mark as our 1000 days together.
It should have been.
Yeah, I'm still counting. Yes, I still remember.
And yes, I still love him.
"Reminiscing someone?" I glanced at my side. I sadly smiled at Bona.
"Yeah," I answered. "I just," I took a deep breath. "I miss him a little,"
"Just a little?" She asked straight away.
I faced the front again and feel the breeze of the cold night.
"A lot," I admitted.
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