Chapter 1

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Ah, what a beautiful day to relax. The sky is blue, the birds are singing-

"Robbie!"

-and so is my dear old mother. Isn't it too early for her to be yelling?

Mirroring her loud tone, I hollered back. "I'm coming!"

I mentally laughed at my damn dirty mind. Or as others refer to it as 'Wild Imagination'. With a yawn and a stretch, I sat up from my comfortable bed. A sudden feminine voice surprised me, I turned my head to find a bare woman smiling mischievously at me.

..What was her name again? Shit.

"Good morning, babe." She winked, sitting up to wrap her arms around me. My eyes traveled to her frame. By the gods of heaven, she may not have melons like Jessica Rabbit, but her package downstairs definitely made up for it.

"'Morning, babygirl." Hopefully she doesn't notice I completely forgot her name.

"Do you really have to leave?" She pouted.

I groaned. "Unfortunately. Thanks to this bloody thing called school."

Her pout didn't disintegrate. Instead, she buried her head against my neck.. inhaling my scent? What the hell is this 'Kardashian-Booty-Owner' doing? Nonetheless, I allowed her. I refused to get slapped in the face so early in the morning.

"Last night, was amazing. I think I'm still sore." She moaned, biting my neck gently. I hummed in response.

"I tend to have that effect on women."

She paused on her actions. Looking up at me with her ocean blue eyes. Normally they'd be clouded with lust, but now, she shot me that 'I'm so chopping off your ding-a-ling' look.

"So you've done this to other girls?! You said you loved me last night!"

"I did-?"

"..You jerk! How could you use me for your own pleasure?! I hate you!"

Ah, cue the sound of her hand slapping my cheek. I winced from the impact, that definitely woke me up.

Furiously, the mysterious girl abruptly began dressing herself. I would've stopped her, if not for my mom's sudden yelling.

"Robbie Pan! Get dressed and get your ass down here now! You will be late for school! ..And we have news for you anyway."

Although the last part was hardly audible, I heard it anyway. My curiosity rose, I completely forgot about the angry woman who's now abruptly coming her hair and caking her face with make up.

When she finished, she glared at me with those dead, murderous eyes. "We're done. I hate you!" And off she stomps downstairs.

With a sigh, I rubbed my cheek in pain. Proceeding my usual morning routine, I instantly got dressed and prepared myself for school. Nonchalantly, I made my way downstairs to find my parents already seated with their breakfast halfway eaten.

"Sit down, and hurry up with your food. Or you'll be late for class."

Without another word, I began ravishing the bacon, egg, sausage, and spoonful of rice that laid on my plate. It was evident I was very hungry, considering I'd already finished my food before my parents had.

I pushed my chair back, "'Right. I'm off for school. Love y-"

"Wait."

I quickly shrank back down to my seat. Maybe my mom doesn't scare me, but when my dad's scolding me, my pants will need to be replaced after I finish pissing on them.

"W-what is it?" I attempted to sound brave. It failed.

This time, my mom spoke. "Your father and I are well aware that you screw with different girls every night, Robbie. And frankly, we're sure as hell tired of receiving no amount of sleep due to your rhythmic yelling and screaming."

Dad then continued, "So, we've come to show you this. And do not even think you can woo your way out of this, you bloody demon." He tossed a folded yellow paper on my lap. My eyes narrowed in suspicion.

"What's this?"

"There's this thing called opening it, sweetie. Use that bird brain of yours for once." My mother mocked me. I guess I did receive my sass from her.

I hesitantly opened the letter, praying to the heaven's above it wasn't some school transferring letter.

My eyes widened, almost as big as that girl's mouth last night.

"Arranged Marriage?!" I gave them a look of despair. "With who?!"

Father raised his cup to sip his coffee. "Her name's at the bottom."

My eyes searched for her name, and I nearly wanted to rip out my intestines.

'(F/N) (L/N)'

I'm gonna have the school's Ice Princess as my wife. Aw crap.

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(A/N) I'm taking a small hiatus from 'The Lost Boy' since I kinda lost motivation. So here's the first chapter for this romantic comedy I'm starting!

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