bucket list || l. norris

forty five

* HAPPY NEW YEAR! here is the first chapter of 2022! please engage as you read with your comments and vote at the end - let's start the year how we mean to go on and hit that 150K reads milestone as soon as we can! i appreciate it so much! enjoy <3 *

PLEASE NOTE: THE TRIGGER WARNING FOR THIS CHAPTER IS MEDIUM/HIGH.

Although there is no explicit description of a motorsport accident, there is discussion of an accident which impacted many members of the racing community. Please keep this in mind when reading and do not hesitate to skip this section if you would prefer.

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"I know that look," Lando lifted my hand to his lips - trying to be discreet - and kissed my warm skin. Qualifying began in just over forty-five minutes and he was about to leave hospitality with Jon to warm up. I asked him to stay five more minutes. He obliged. "What's wrong? I know there's something on your mind."

We flew to Belgium with Lando's family and my parents, Micah staying at home to travel to London with Ivo. They were smitten and from what Micah told me on FaceTime last night whilst Lando showered, he was going to meet Ivo's parents this weekend. I felt overjoyed with excitement for him.

"I'm just nervous being back at a race track. My routine has changed again," I shrugged, leaning my back against the door, close to our families but out of earshot. I didn't want mum worrying about me because there really wasn't anything to worry about. In myself, physically, I felt fine. It was the heightened emotions of a race weekend which we're getting to me. "You know how happy it makes me to be at a race track, especially at a race track by your side. It'll pass. It's just nerves."

"Our families are here. Everything is okay. There is nothing to be afraid of, I promise you," Lando squeezed my hand. Since nobody at work knew about us, we couldn't be too forward about our newly romantic relationship. "I'll be right by your side when I'm not in the car. And even then, I'm not far away."

He grazed his fingers across the team wear covering my chest. I knew what he meant.

"I miss Micah," I sighed. "I wish he was here."

I knew he would be happy with Ivo, but after spending so much more time with him than usual during the summer break because we were both at our parents' house more often than not, I missed him because we were apart. It felt weird, however, not having him close by. A body of water separated us. During the summer break, I was used to a walk separating us.

Micah meeting Ivo's family was so important to him and for their relationship. I wanted them to get together more than anything, and I couldn't wait for my brother to bring his boy home, and introduce Ivo as his boy to our family. Even without meeting Ivo properly, and just over FaceTime a few times, I just knew he was perfect for my brother. Never in a million years would he compare to Elijah.

Lando kissed my forehead before leading me back to our families. He needed to get going. I couldn't keep him here any longer. I watched as he embraced his mum and told her he loved her, before we left hospitality with a wave. Proudly, I walked by his side and into the garage. Lando spent some time with Jon warming up, giving me ten minutes to go through the post-Quali media schedule for the last time today.

With a headset around my neck, I unlocked my phone to snap a few pictures of Lando's car. I wanted to post some pictures right now to share with my friends and family. My Instagram was private as I didn't want to be bothered by too many fans. Part of me felt guilty for having that mindset, especially because most fans knew who I was to Lando and about our friendship, but I feared posting pictures of us online. The pictures we took day in, day out were our special memories. I was convinced that one day, those pictures would be the only thing Lando had left of me. For that reason, I didn't want to post every single one on a public social media page.