My way, soon

Chapter 16- Rain

"What is that suppose to mean Sam, Why did you even do it to begin with, I'm your best friend."

"You WERE my best friend, We haven't been best friends since you started dating Jake." He said loudly, emotionally.

"Who's fault is that Sam, you just stopped talking to me. And just because we aren't friends doesn't mean you can kiss me." I yelled getting closer to him, rain still pouring on us both.

"It's mine! I can't stand being around you and Jake, It's torture." He said his eyes filling up with tears 

"You used to be around us all the time, whats the difference now." I said back

"I HAVE FEELINGS FOR YOU SLOAN.  How can you not see it!" He yelled once again his voice cracking as he kept getting closer to me. 

"Sam you've known me for years and you have never once mentioned liking me." I yelled, my heart racing, "You think I never had feelings for you Sam? You never gave me the time of day as anything but your best friend and I was scared to ruin it.  You think I never wanted to kiss you the nights I stayed over?  You had years to tell me you had feelings Sam."

"I didn't know what we had until it was gone, and then all I knew was that I needed more. But it was too late and you were already with Jake." He said now crying, standing inches away from me.

"You're right, it is too late." I said my eyes filling with tears, my clothes heavy with water, sticking to me and making me even more on edge than I was. If this had happened months ago I would have chose Sam in a heartbeat, but now I loved Jake.  "I love Jake, you know I love Jake, we make each other happy. I don't have feelings for you anymore Sam"

"Then why are you still standing here, and why did you let me kiss you the other night?" He said placing his hands on either side of my face. I went to turn my head away but he held it still, I didn't know the answer to his question, Or maybe I did and I just didn't want to admit it to myself. I started to cry, my face still in his hands. He removed one hand pushing my wet hair away from my face and tucking it behind my ear, He slowly pulled me forward, kissing me again.  This time I didn't pull away.  It felt like my whole body was melting into his.  When he finally pulled away I saw him blushing through the water drops on his face.  I sat in silence for a moment before I finally spoke.

"Sam, I can't do this. I can't do this to Jake, I do  love him.  I'm sorry but I choose him"  I said taking Sam's hand.  He nodded his head.

"I just needed you to know how I felt, I know its selfish but I had to tell you." he said looking down.  "Now you know."

"I do and I'm sorry, we have to forget this ever happened." I said turning and walking to the bus.

"Sloan wait, promise me if you ever start to change your mind you will give me a chance," he said grabbing my hand before I opened the door,

"Sam.." I sighed as I shook my head

"Sloan please, thats all I ask.  I will leave you alone if you just make that one promise, we can go back to being friends" He said gripping my hand with both of his

"Fine, I promise."  He smiled and let go of my hand.  I opened the door and peeked inside to see that Josh and Danny were still asleep despite me and Sam's heated conversation outside the bus.   I went into me and Jakes room to see him still out cold on the bed, I breathed a sigh of relief.  I grabbed some dry clothes and headed to the bathroom quietly.  I took off my soaked clothes and wrung them out in the shower then hung them over the curtain rod to dry.  I slipped on my dry clothes and snuck into bed with Jake.   I stayed awake processing what had just happened.  Sam had feelings for me?  It finally all made sense, thats why he had been avoiding me, thats why he had given me the rose, that is why he got so upset when he saw me and Jake the first time, why couldn't he have just told me then.  Would it have mattered or would I still have chose Jake? I didn't know, and why did I promise him I'd let him know if I changed my mind, did that mean I thought I might in the future?  Jake turned in the bed still asleep and wrapped his arm around me.  I was happy, I just needed to remember that.

I woke up the next day to hear laughter in the kitchen, I smiled, it had been so tense on the bus it was nice to hear laughter.  I pulled on my robe and went to see who it was.  It was Danny and Jake, watching some video on youtube that had them both belly laughing. 

"What is going on here," I said smiling and sitting down beside Jake,

"Just watching funny videos," Jake said kissing me on the forehead, "Did we wake you?"

"No, I needed to get up, I want to get more pics and run some errands before we go."  I said standing up and getting coffee.  "What time do we leave?" 

"Well Sam and Josh just went for the interview so I'd say a couple hours," Danny said

"Ok great," I said walking back to the room. "I think I will do some laundry today while I'm out."  I walked around the room grabbing clothes from the ground and putting them in the bag to take to the laundromat. 

"Hey Sloan, can you take a couple of my clothes too?" Danny said peeking  his head in the door,

"Of course go grab them and bring them to me." I said still picking up clothes.  Jake walked into our room and started to go into the bathroom,

"Wait can you hand me those?" I said pointing to the clothes on the shower. 

"Why are they soaking wet?" He said puzzled as he handed them to me.  I froze, I didn't want him to worry.

"The skyline looked so pretty last night, I wanted to take pictures and it started raining." I said plainly.  He nodded and cracked the bathroom door, not closing it all the way.  Danny came back into the room holding a big pile of clothes,

"Thanks Sloan," He said handing me the clothes, "those are mostly mine but I found some of Sams that he left on the bathroom floor, they are soaking wet, I'm not sure what happened there but I'm sure he won't mind if you wash them."    I heard the bathroom door slowly open, Jake stared at Sam's wet clothes in my hand as he connected the dots.   He pushed past me and Danny and stormed off the bus.

"What the hell just happened?" Danny said confused. 

"I just fucked up." I said dropping the clothes and taking off after Jake.