Second Chances {ManxMan}

CHAPTER 19

I never missed work after that, not once because I have my children to think about and I'd already experienced grief and gotten through it enough to know how to get through this one.

It had already been three weeks since we spoke. Emmett was completely hiding but I was thankful that Katya still went to school and the little girl was even more excited being Duncan's friends.

Logan worried the most, probably because he understood the bond between mates better, Parker was still young but I couldn't really say and Duncan, well, he saw life as usual save for Emmett and Katya's visits being cut off completely.

"You should take some time off." I was putting on my shoes when Logan spoke.

"I can't do that."

"Yes you can." I sighed and stood to give him a wavering smile and cursed myself for not maintaining its stability.

"I have kids, Logan. I have to pay the bills and take care of you all. If my feelings get in the way of that, I'd never forgive myself."

"But you do too much." He grabbed my arm. "I spoke to the Alpha, we can all go stay at the pack house while you sort it out, it isn't a problem and they have enough to fund me through college they can do the same for Parker and Duncan."

"I'm not going to make them do that when I'm able bodied."

"How much longer until you break too far because you haven't dealt with it?" He growled and glared and I reared my head back in surprise. "I watched you cry yourself to sleep for months after dad died and you say you got through it, you say you were okay but we could see it. We see it now."

I held my breathe looking through my child and feeling sorry that he had to see such.

"I'll try harder," I nodded trying not to cry as my eyes burned. "I'll make sure you never see a shred of pain from me again."

"Dad-"

"I love you. Okay." I took his hand and smiled sadly, kissing his hand and patting the skin before walking around him to get to work after dropping Duncan off at school.

I worked through my day as fast as I could, making sure I was busy enough that I didn't get to think about anything until my boss knocked at my table, I looked up at the man and he cleared his throat and set down a note and left.

Thank you for your hard work, Simon. Take the rest of the day off and hang in there.

I blinked looking around, a few known faces peaked at me and my brows furrowed as I shook my head determined not to let them do that to me because I would surely go mad if I went home and I really had time to think.

Maybe Logan was right, I wasn't dealing and it wasn't healthy it was just... defence. I sighed halfway through the day, the boss of me giving me weird looks as it had been made clear I could leave early. I left three hours before time having gotten tires of their determined looks.

Walking to my door was slow and painful and even thought of what to make for dinner didn't actually help.

"Simon?" I blinked and paused, turning to see him. Emmett was completely beautiful through and through. He had bags under his eyes but he still managed to maintain a healthy look, I wondered if I looked as dreadful as I felt.

I turned fully towards him. He played with his keys in his hand, pursing his lips before finally he walked towards me.

The man's lips parted and I watched him, my heart going crazy. I felt my eyes burn and wondered if this was it. If he was going to tell me he was moving, that I was a monster and that he wanted nothing to do with me.