Not again

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The first thing Lexa does when she leaves the club is walk across the street to grab a pack of cigarettes. If it wasn't for the liquor in her system, her hands would probably have been shaking when she lit the first one from the pack. She takes a huge hit from it and lets it out slowly, as she stands against the wall in the alley by the store.

Intent on giving herself only a cigarettes worth of time before she has to go back to Clarke, Lexa reflects on everything that just happened. She smokes her cigarette slow, twirling it between her fingers, focusing on the glowing tip. Watching as it burns brighter with each hit before turning into nothing but dull ash. She tries to convince herself that Clarke will never step foot into that club ever again.  After these few minutes are over, she wants to be sure she stays strong for Clarke, that she can be there for her one hundred percent. So she doesn't stop the flood of images that assault her own mind. All of them of Clarke and what she has been doing here, just to survive. Lexa lets herself feel and cry alone, in the shadows of the alley, while she tells herself that it's over. Clarke is going home. The tears slow with every inhale and exhale of swirling grey smoke, and are completely gone by the time she stomps the butt out. When she pushes off from the wall to head back, she holds her chin up higher and her shoulders that much straighter.

On her walk back to the hotel, she decides she won't tell Clarke about this for a while, and will focus just on getting her home. Once they are home, she will call up Dr. Jackson and ask him to please just write Clarke a script for a weeks worth of uncut pills, and will promise him a follow up appointment with Clarke within that week. Her parents are in D.C. for a long weekend, so she thinks she will offer Clarke to stay at their house with her, not wanting to take her to the loft just yet. If Clarke doesn't want to go her mom's, Lexa's parents place will be the best for her. Hopefully.

Her phone vibrates in her pocket when she rides up in the elevator, and she grabs it without thinking. There are only two people she wants to talk to right now, and they are only a few floors away. But there is one person she should have talked to by now, and her name is the one flashing across Lexa's screen right now.

Octavia Blake: thought we were on for dinner tonight. How dare u stand a lady up woods.

Lexa sighs, staring at the name. Lexa really should have called her by now, if anyone deserves to know that she found Clarke, it's her.

Octavia Blake is Clarke's oldest friend. The two girls grew up together, next door to each other in fact, and their parents were also very close. They grew up on the north east side of Detroit, and their moms had been best friends since they were three. When Clarke and Octavia were twelve, they both lost their fathers in the same tragic accident where the men were working.

They had been working under the table for a sketchy construction company, who were hired to fix some of the freeway overpasses. Their equipment wasn't up to code, and the overpass had collapsed while the men were under it. Due to the fact that the men weren't legally employed and their moms didn't have money for a good lawyer, they got nothing in the wrongful death lawsuit and the company walked away scot-free.

After the deaths, the two families couldn't afford both their homes, so they moved into to the Blake house together. Abby Griffin spiraled into a deep depression after the loss of her husband, and found solace at the bottom of every vodka bottle she could get her hands on. Aurora Blake worked at the diner down the street during the day, and sold her body most nights, to try and support everyone. Clarke dropped out of school at fourteen to stay around the house to take care of things there and her mom, who had unfortunately fully succumbed to her own demons. She also started to sell drugs for one of her Dad's friends who ran things around their block. No matter what, Clarke made sure Octavia stayed in school though. She thought so highly of her, knowing the girl was bright and actually could have the future she could never see for herself.

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