Yandere Toons x Reader: An Anthology of Headcanons and Scenarios

Heinz Doofenshmirtz (Romantic Scenario - "Prima Facie")

"I just want you to know that I care. I wanted to say that before anything else because sometimes I feel like you aren't aware that I care. I know I can make it difficult to stay, but I don't mean to do that. It's just that I forget what I'm trying to say when it comes time to say it. The thoughts get all wishy-washy in my brain, and by the time I figure it out, you're walking away."

As the letter went on, it became increasingly repetitive and erred in the territory of incoherence. Much of it consisted of the same sentiments repeated with negligible differences, but apologies for inspiring discomfort were sprinkled between the ubiquitous reminder that he cared and the assertion that he had no other option.

A creak at the door shattered the teenager's concentration, prompting her to draw the letter towards her chest and look at her father. His footsteps paused for a moment before jumping into a speed-walk. "Vanessa, what are you reading?" Fright and a twinge of dread quickened his words and brought the makings of an accusatory edge to his question.

"Is this for Mom again?" The exasperated tone creeping into the tight crease of her lips and the slight furrow of her eyebrows obtained a sound of sorrow from Doofenshmirtz, who proceeded to rub the nape of his neck.

"No, no! It's not!" he assured her in a manner that was almost too enthusiastic for Vanessa's liking. The shadow of happiness spread across his face, but it was soon accompanied by sheepish hesitation like a secret dragged into the limelight. "As you may know, I've been getting back out there lately." Each word struggled to leave his mouth in a conflicting mix of eagerness to share the announcement and reluctance to speak it and risk humiliation. "And, eh, I may have met someone."

Vanessa slowly lowered the paper back onto the desk, retaining a slight hold on the top right corner. "This is only a rough draft, right?" She tested the notion with a dour curiosity that contradicted the aloof indifference radiating from her lax shoulders and listless frown like a heat lamp as a hint of genuine wariness leaked into her voice.

Doofenshmirtz waved his hands at the girl in a desperate expression of disregard and looked askance at the ceiling. "Of course! Of course, it is! I've been workshopping it for a few days now -- eh, trying some different styles. You know, hard-hitting go-getter versus lovey-dovey." Throughout the scientist's loquacious display of twirling his wrists as if to snatch the best explanation out of the air, he never met his daughter's gaze until the final syllable when he offered a placid smile.

"Good, because this isn't fit for human eyes." The teenager watched the emotional shift in her father with the poker face of an expert gambler.

He blinked, and his shoulders slumped. Following a weak chuckle, Doofenshmirtz crinkled his eyes and acted as if a weight were pulling him towards the ground. "Oh, Vanessa. You can say the cruellest things." The scientist approached his desk in a series of languid steps, collecting the letter as his daughter hopped down. She distanced herself from him by walking in the direction of the reception area.

The sound of scribbling caused her to glance at Doofenshmirtz, seeing him in the chair once again with his slouch especially apparent. Vanessa plucked her cell phone from her pocket and dialled the friend who acted as a quasi therapist. As the girl turned her back to the scientist, he jumped out of his seat and hugged the letter to his chest while alternating between hopping on his left foot and hopping on his right foot. "Lacie, can I come over? Yeah, my dad's being weird again."

* * *

Webbed feet slapping the tile floors, the secret agent marched to a red chair stationed at a curved desk. On the desk were a series of computer screens and vivid buttons that protruded slightly from the metal surface. Perry climbed onto the chair, which was much larger than he was and caused him to resemble a toddler sitting in an oversized car seat.