Twilight's Peak

Sam's POV

"Ahhh!" I scream, releasing it all.
Time slowly went on as I found myself resting against an old hollow log. I sit lightly afraid that it will give way on the steep slope we were at. The sound of the water running was interrupted by this eerie sound that I don't even know how to describe. A chill shoots down my spine as the feeling of being watched grows inside me. Adding a bit of fear in my mind. I slide off of the log decaying log and begin walking down the hill again, back the way I came from. I followed the creek until it split off and I turned left, leading back to my house.
The whole way back home, the feeling of being watched stuck with me, lingering... I walked back up the hill again and walked the edge of the creek until it opened up into a small clearing and I see the huge porch on our house. I break out in a dead sprint and race up the front steps of the house. The whole sky was dark and eerie with the huge rain clouds off in the distance. It was certainly raining towards that direction. I wonder if it's coming this way? I think to myself. The weather had been all kinds of wacky lately. I turned the knob to the front door and pushed it open, stepping into the foyer and locking the door behind me. I followed the curved stairs up to the top and found myself staring at the door.
His door...
I push the door open and step inside. It's been six days since he's been gone. He literally was here one moment, and gone in the next. Thinking of that led the thoughts of dad to fill my head. It had been almost seven months since his death and it still didn't feel real half of the time. I step out of the room and find myself looking at the picture frames on the wall. Dad was in the top one, holding Nathan for the first time when he was born. I see another one of him and mom, it was their wedding photos. There were several more photos of all of us, scattered across the walls; all frozen in time, never to age again. The sound of rain tapping against the house began to grow intensely and I slowly slide down to the floor. I continue looking up at the pictures on the wall and sigh. I miss you... I miss both of you... I think to myself. God, please let us find Nate. Please... I plead.
I need him...
After several minutes passing by and my feet falling asleep, I finally forced myself up and off of the floor and try walking to the stairs. I wanted something to drink but my feet were finding it hard to walk with them being numb. It literally feels like walking with a balloon as a foot.
I pull a lime Gatorade out of the fridge's door and twist the cap off to take a sip. As I shut the door to the fridge, the door to mom's office caught my attention. Mom rarely left it open, and she didn't really care for us messing around in there. She always says that it's no big problem and that we can use it for whatever, but it's a bit obvious that she didn't want us using it and accidentally making a mess in her little sanctuary, she always called it the one spot in the house what was dedicated to her and blah blah blah...
I see the suitcase that Liam and Jaxon had found that night. It was leaning up against the wall, sort of out of the way if you weren't looking for it. I pick it up and try opening it again. Jax and Liam, along with Kason and Casey, couldn't open it either. I remember I had went to bed and left them to be. I guess they couldn't get it open. I pick it up and set it down on top of mom's desk. I wonder if I could pick the lock? I think to myself. I begin opening the top drawers looking for two paper clips and come up empty handed. I could have sworn mom had a huge tub filled with them. I open the bottom drawers and see a book. It had a grey front with white letters across it. 'How to Know When Your Marriage is Failing'. What is this? I think to myself.
"Umm..." I say out loud to myself with a horrid face.
Underneath the book, was a small notebook. I pick that up too and quickly flip through the pages to see what's in it. There were page after page filled with notes. The one paragraph I read before dropping the book and leaving was, 'There are days where I feel that life has moved on and I'm still stuck behind. I can feel myself closing off from my husband who I loved, but I just can't seem to find the nerve to tell him. He has done nothing wrong, but I can feel us drifting apart this past year or so. What do I do? Do I stay and fight for this? Or do I do the impossible, and leave?
At the bottom of the page, she wrote and underlined, pray about this.
Was mom unhappy? Is mom unhappy?
Stay out of her business, I suddenly think to myself. I put everything back where it was and grab the suitcase and walk away. I grabbed the kitchen knife from sink and begin trying to pry it open. The first time the knife slipped, I thought I had did it. The second time made no success. The third time, the knife slipped and I felt it slice right through the tip of my finger. Instantly, I drop the knife and blood began to gush out. I quickly rip a piece of paper towel off of the roll and wrap it around my finger. I can already tell this is going to need stitches. I'm no going back to the hospital, I tell myself.
I open up the junk drawer and look for the superglue. In the very back was the small bottle with the lid crusted shut. The lid gave way and popped off and I opened the wound to glue it. I then squeezed it shut and glued the outside. I blew on it for several seconds to get it to dry.
I grabbed some more paper towels and wet them down to clean the bar off.
"Bastard." I mutter as I pick up the knife to wash in the sink very carefully not to cut myself again.
The sound of car doors shutting came from outside and I peek through the kitchen window to see Kason and Casey waking down the sidewalk and up to the front door. I grabbed the suitcase and shoved it back into moms office out of the way where it was pretty much unseen.
The front door opened and Casey smiled as she saw my face. She walks up to me and wraps her arms around me, holding me in a death grip.
"Oh baby bro... I'm glad you're back home." She says and ruffles my curly hair.
Kason shuts the front door and walks up to us. He gives me a quick hug too and says that he was really worried for a minute. Casey then begins talking about the funeral and how it was honestly one of the saddest funerals that she had been too.
"Where is mom now then?" I ask.
"Oh she went to the station to talk with the sheriff about getting a search party out. She's trying to use the phone call Liam had with him to our-" I cut her off.
"Phone call?!" I burst out, " Liam talked to Nate?"
A tiny amount of Relief lifts from me and I remember that we still have to find him... and quick. Casey continues talking about what all I had missed while I was in a coma and how she passed her finals. She would be starting her residency this fall in Springfield. Her and Kason were going to move up there after summer. I told her that was pretty exciting. At least she wouldn't be too far away. Kason walked into the family room and grabbed the remote to turn on the tv. Casey and I followed behind him and I sat in the middle of the sectional and Casey by her husband.
Casey's phone rings all of a sudden and she answers it. She begins talking to someone on the other line, but I couldn't quite make out who it was. It wasn't till the very end I caught whose voice it was. Mom's...
"Yes, that's good news then. Everything will be just fine, trust me." Casey says before ending the call.
"Was that mom?" I asked.
"It was Sammy...Mom said that they're starting a search party for Nathan real soon." She says.
That's great!
"Now, tell me more about the phone all from Nathan." I demanded.
"Well Sammy... They're working on pin pointing the location of the phone call and where it took place. Also, they said he was... he was in distress." She says, seemingly trying to guard her feelings.
I stifled a sob and tried forcing the feeling down. I didn't want to cry like a baby again.
As the night grew older, I could barely keep my eyes open.
"Guys, I've got to go to bed. Im exhausted..." I tell them.
They both told me goodnight and that they loved me before I turned and left the room. I shuffled across the floor to the stairs and groggily made my way up to the top. Each step more tiring than the one before. My bed was unmade but I didn't care, I was too tired. I kicked my shoes off and fell into my bed. Even though I waited to fall asleep, sleep did not come. My luck... I just wanted to sleep and I couldn't even have that.
The only thing that I could think of was counting to a large number. Turns out, it actually worked. I chose to count to 1,000 and by the time I was nearing 700, I must have drifted off.
I awoke to the sound of something tapping on my window. I rolled over to see a huge black crow glaring at me. That couldn't be right... I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and the crow was still there, looking at me. The stupid little bird pecked at my window again, this time chipping the outer pane of the glass.
"You little prick!" I spit out, forcing myself out of bed and trying to shoo him away.
The bird turned and flew off. Good riddance, I think to myself. With that, I turned and pulled the things out of my pocket. My phone was dead and in the other hand, was a button. It was the button that Nathan had found before disappearing, I found it in his room and must have forgotten to put it back.
Just as I flipped the button over and was studying it, the stupid little crow came right back and smacked its whole body into my window; snapping its neck and falling to its death. There was a little trace of blood on the now cracked window pane. Mom was going to be pissed.
What even just happened though?
I plugged my phone up real quick and ran out of the room without even putting shoes on first. Mom's door was shut to her room, but the light was on. I quietly ran down the stairs and unlocked the front door to run around the side of the the house. The birds were chirping and the sound of water moving in the distance grew as I rounded the side of the house. I was right above Nathan's bedroom window, even from here, I could see the huge chip in his window as well. There was a faint whiff of death as the window blew towards me. I glanced into mom's flower bed and saw them laying there dead. There were three crows that were rotting behind the roses. Why the hell are there freakin birds flying into our windows and killing themselves? Just seeing the maggots crawl out of their mouths was enough to have my stomach churning. Threatening to throw up. I turn and walk around to the side where my window is. They're on the ground, was a freshly killed crow that must have been suicidal or something. That's four freakin birds that are dead... Why?
Something was going on, and I didn't like this feeling. Something was about to happen, and I couldn't tell if it was going to be bad or good.
Don't worry about it. Focus on finding your brother, he needs your help. I hear my voice in my head.
I stood there staring at my window for a solid minute before turning and walking back inside. As I walked up the steps to our front porch, another burst of air shot through me and something a nasty odor was back. This time though, I could tell what it was, It was me and I seriously needed a hot shower. The door closed behind me and I walked up the stairs and back to my room. My phone was partially charged and the time was almost seven in the morning. I swear it was later than that...whatever. I pulled some clothes from the drawers and made my way to the hall bathroom.
By the time I had finished drying off and getting dressed, mom's door was open this time with the light off. She must be downstairs doing something now. I tossed my clothes into the hamper in my room and grabbed my phone before putting my deodorant on. I pulled out a yellow shirt that I had gotten from our last vacation to the beach and threw it on.
Mom was in the kitchen on the phone with someone as I entered the kitchen. She was pouring herself another cup of coffee. That wasn't the weird part, she was all dressed like she was going to go hiking. Her hair pulled back in a high ponytail and a light grey shirt and navy pants. Mom spotted me and waved at me with fingers while holding the coffee mug.
"I've got to go Justin, Sam's here. Okay...Yes, See you in a little bit." She says before hanging up.
"Sorry about that sweetie, that was Justin, we were talking about- Oh yeah, I assume Casey told you about Nathan last night right?" She asks.
"Yeah... She said something about a search party starting real soon, that was all she said." I tell her.
"Well, after going back and forth, and then the phone call Liam got... I got the sherif to approve of the search party... which so happens to be in like twenty minutes." She says and looks at her watch.
"WHAT? Why didn't you tell me when you got home?" I asked, actually kind of mad that Casey told me last night but mom couldn't even wake me up to tell me.
"I am sorry about that dear, but I went over to Justin and Jaxon's house to be with them for a while. I lost track of time talking... talking with everyone that my phone died and it was super late. Plus, I didn't want to wake you since you were already asleep. Again... I'm really sorry about that." she says.
"Now come give your mama a hug, I sure need one this morning." She says and pulls me into a tight embrace.
She told me to hurry and get my shoes on because we needed to get going, she wanted to get there early. I walked back up the stairs and quickly pulled my socks up and laced my black and grey under armor shoes before walking back downstairs. I Mom was already in the garage because the sound of her expedition starting, plus she left the door into the garage open. Before I left the kitchen, I took my medicine and turned to walk into the garage. I pulled it shut behind me and opened the front door of the black car. She put the car into gear and backed out of the garage. The sun was hidden behind scattered clouds as we slowly drove down the street.
"So where are we starting at mom?" I ask.
"We're actually starting at the bridge. I don't remember if I told you but the phone call between Nathan and Liam was pin pointed to this area in a ten mile radius." She says.
With us living only a few minutes away from the bridge, we were there before she even finished informing me about what the plan was. There were already several cop cars and first responder trucks off to the side of road in the ditch. Mom parked the car next to one of the trucks and got out of her car. She walked over to some of the deputies talking and Sheriff Manus; I stayed by the car and waited. I didn't know who all were going to be here. I watched the road like a hawk, waiting for more people to show. To my surprise, the first truck that came was Liam's. I could see Liam driving and Jaxon riding passenger. Behind them was another truck, which was Justin, Jaxon's dad.
They pulled right next to mom's car and shut the engine off.
"Hey guys." I told them.
"Hey man, hows it going?" Liam asked.
"Yeah,how are you?" Jaxon followed.
"I'm doing okay... you know, under the circumstance." I say and shrug my shoulder.
Justin waved before walking over to mom. I watched over my shoulder as my mom noticed him. I swear it looked like she was almost too excited to see him.
Several other people showed up to help look. I lost count after forty or so people, everyone had the face of determination on them. Jaxon leaned against the truck and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. He looked like a zombie, like he hadn't slept in a few days. I totally understood though, he just lost him own mom; I was the same way for weeks when dad died. It just didn't seem real, like we were living in a nightmare that we couldn't be woken from.
There were several people Nathan's age here too, they came to search also. Sheriff Manus called out and began talking about what the plan was.
"Okay, there's quite a crowd here this morning. That's good... We are searching for a recovery, so there is no room for anything besides one common goal. Finding Nathan Adams... We are on day six everybody, there's still time for us if he's out there. Okay... We are splitting up into four groups, two of you will be going North up the river to walk the waters and the tree line. The other two teams will be going South of the river and walking the waters and tree line. We are going to have two officers per group to help, we are going to do this efficient so we can bring this young man home safely. If you find something...anything... do not hesitate to tell the officer closest to you. They all have their radios and we are all on the same channel. This whole area, there is little to no cell service, so don't be alarm if none of your phones have service as you walk deeper into the tree line. Alrighty everyone, lets' break off into teams of ten and work together as a team." He finishes.
Jaxon, Liam, me, Deputy Rick,Deputy Hardin, and a few other people from our school were on team three. Mom was on team one with Justin and Sheriff Manus and Deputy Jane. You won't believe who else was on mom's team, or at least the other team that was walking up the North side of the creek was none other than Mandy herself and one of the girls that she was friends with. She had her hair braided back in a tight braid and was dressed just like mom was.
"Liam, Jax... look who showed up to help today." I said softly and pointed behind me with my head.
They both glanced in that direction and spotted her almost instantly.
"No fucking way... Nathan would get a kick out of this. She hated his guts... or so we thought. There's no way she would be here without feeling something. Am I right or am I right?" Liam says.
Him cussing didn't phase me at all, I was used to his. He always had a loose mouth and blurted out whatever came to his mind. Which tended to be funny, even at bad times.
Jaxon agreed with him, me on the other hand, I didn't really know who she was but from hearing Nathan and them talking about her. The more I thought about it, the more I could see it. I read an article one time in class about how some people who don't know how to work their emotions or ways of expressing tended to be very vocal and kind of verbally abusive, if not kind of physically abusive like punches to the arm or whatever. I honestly couldn't rambler what exactly the article said but surely this was close enough. I mean, I could believe it. Nathan really would get a kick out of seeing her here. I can't wait to tell him... I mean, I hope I get the chance to be able to tell him.
I looked back over my shoulder and both of their teams had began walking down the ditch next to the creek. Jaxon spotted a coffee station and quickly poured himself a straight black coffee to wake him up. After that, our teams were off and we were walking down the steep slope to the water.
Our team walked the water and the whole right side of the wooded area and the other team practically disappeared into the thick woods to the left to begin searching. Nathan could be anywhere. Anywhere...
The water was about waist deep on me as I slowly waded into the middle and searching the waters for anything. Liam was right next to me in the water and Deputy Rick was was on the other side of me. Somehow Jaxon was on the bank, along with the other Deputy Hardin; fighting through all of the green briers and what not. You could hear them curse under their breathes as one of those stupid vibes got them.
Even though we were in the cool water, I was already feeling the sun through the trees. It was going to be a scorching hot day, my forehead was already heated with sweet and it was only going to get worse. Maybe I shouldn't have worn a yellow shirt. Too late now...
There wasn't much talking going on besides comments about being careful and what not. I pulled my phone out and we had already been here three hours and we probably hadn't even walked three miles yet. I looked over to see Jaxon fighting with the vines and briers with scratches all over his arms and face.
"Hey Jax, do you want to switch places for a while?" I asked.
He looked relieved when I asked him that. I waded towards the edge of the water and stepped back up onto the back. He thanked me and practically fell into the cold water. It'll be fine... I tell myself, it'll be fine...
Jaxon and Liam would strike a conversation every once in a while and both of the deputies kept talking to each other and reassuring that we're doing good. As the day grew older, the heat rose. It was freaking miserable having to walk through the heat and fighting the mosquitos. I was about ready for a water break personally. The slope of the land started to decline rather steep.
"Everybody watch their steps, we don't want to carry one of y'all back up the creek if you break a leg." Deputy Hardin says.
Not even a minute later, I used my now soaked shirt to wipe my face off and stumbled over a stupid root face planting into the leaves. This was more embarrassing than painful.
"What did I say... Are you okay?" Deputy Hardin asks.
"I'm okay... I just tripped. I swear, I'm-" I say pausing.
A familiar bracelet or more watch band was showing through the leaves. I reached for it and pulled it out. There was only half of the band and apple watch connected to it, like it was ripped off or something. This was Nathan's watch!
"GUYS! I found something... I found Nate's watch! He was here..." I tell them feeling hopeful again.
I pushed myself up from the ground and slid down the edge of the bank and into the water to show Deputy Rick. He instantly called out on his radio to tell the rest that we found something.
"Are you sure that this is your brother's?" He asks.
"Yes, I am positive. He bought the band when we were at the beach last summer... It's his, I promise." I say, trying to sound confident.
This was good right? Nathan was here. We're going to find you, I promise.
I love you brother...
"Okay guys, let's start heading back for break. This is a good sign, we'll get the dogs out and have them search." Deputy Rick says.
The trip back to the bridge was much quicker, as we weren't looking for anything. Jaxon made small talk with Liam and me about how it's going to be just fine. I can't believe that I'm spending the beginning of my summer break or just any of my summer break searching for my brother. It felt false, like none of it was really real. It just felt weird, I know he isn't here with us, yet the feeling of him being with was was strangely fierce. I could practically feel his presence, that's how I knew he was somewhere close. He was near, we just had to find him.
We'll find you brother, I promise...
There was a table set up under this blue tent with water bottles and sandwiches. I couldn't believe how thirsty and hungry I was. I quickly finished off two bottles of water and began destroying the savory turkey and cheese sandwich. Liam sat stood next to me as we leaned against the bed of his truck. Jaxon stood across from us on the other side shoving his sandwich in his face.
"This is the best damn turkey and cheese sandwich that I've ever had. Mmm..." Jaxon says with a mouthful.
A small laugh escapes my mouth and Liam agrees with him. Under the circumstance, this would have been fun hanging out with them, but then I remember why we're actually here. We're here to find Nathan. The whole walking through water and fighting the briers sucked the energy right out of me. I was drained...
I wiped the crumbs from the edge of my mouth and opened the front passenger seat to moms car. I pulled myself up into the seat and leaned back to get comfortable. Jaxon and Liam walked up to the car and leaned against it to continue talking. I could already feel myself slowly drifting away. As I fought to stay awake, I listened as they talked about how Nathan was going to be found. The last thing I remembered was Liam talking about how he was having dreams that felt so real that his voice trembled at times talking about them.
"We just have to find him quick... He doesn't have much longer. I can feel it." He says.
The fighting to stay away finally lost, my eyes rolled up in the back of my head and everything went mute.
"Hey way wake up..."
Someone shakes my arm and says it again.
"Sam..."
I rolled my head over and the sun was drooping in the sky. Liam and Jax were standing right next to me. Jax was the one who was trying to wake me. They were coated in sweat and dirt.
"What?" I asked groggily, wiping the sleep from my eyes.
"We just wanted to let you know that we going to be heading out. Your mom and my dad and the other groups should be getting back any time. You fell asleep, so we left you and went back to look." Jaxon says.
At first, I was angry for them not waking me, but it was probably for the best; I honestly don't think I could have walked anymore. My body was still fatigue, and I didn't want to over do it and not be able to continue helping search. Mom would make me stay home and rest.
"That's okay... I think it was for the best. I was exhausted, well I still am but a little better. Are you guys coming tomorrow?" I say.
They both said that they were going to be here the same time tomorrow. Liam said that he would bring me one of those energy drinks that I like if he remembered. I thanked him and said that did didn't have to. Really though, I hoped he did.
"See you guys tomorrow." I say.
"See ya." Jax says.
"Yeah, see ya." Liam says.
The truck soon disappears around the corner of the road and off into the distant. There were a few people standing around by the bridge talking and eating or drinking. I saw the deputies that were in our group standing there talking with some other deputies. Some of them were holding a leash to the dog they must have brought to search near the area where the watch was found.
"Hey officer!" I called out as I walked towards them.
He turned and greeted me formally.
"Is everything okay?" He asked.
"Yes, I was actually wondering if you guys found anything else out?" I ask.
"No, the dogs couldn't find any lead around the area the watch was found. It may be from us getting all this rain, it could have washed any sent that was left behind. Sorry son, but don't worry... We'll find him." He says reassuringly.
"I understand, thank you." I say.
Mom's group finally came back. She was walking next to Justin rather closely and spotted me, instantly putting a gap between them. She smiled and wiped her forehead.
"Hey buddy, how'd your day go? We came up empty handed. I heard that you found Nathan's watch... sweetie we're going to find him. I promise." She says.
She pulls me into a tight squeeze and holds me. What is it with everybody making promises they can't keep. We don't know if we'll find Nathan. We don't know anything. It's getting annoying hearing people making false promises to try and add hope to a very gloomy situation.
"Mom... Can we go home now?" I ask.
"Of course sweetie. Let's go." She says.
She holds on a second longer, soaking it in before releasing me back to my own free will. I turned and headed to the car to turn it on as she stayed and talked to Justin for a moment. I couldn't hear their conversation fully but I knew from just hearing mom's voice when she talked to him sounded different. She sounded happy. Are mom and him a thing? I think to myself. I hear him say that he has to go pick his daughters up from his mothers house and waved to mom as they departed from each other and walked down the ditch to his truck and mom over to the drivers side door of the car and opened it up. The cool air on my face felt refreshing, it was definitely an upgrade from the muggy air and hot sun.
Mom put the car into gear and turned sharply to head back home. She drove slowly across the bridge, and leaned back in her seat. She looked relaxed. Mom was different. There was definitely something going on. Do I ask her or wait? Honestly I just told myself to let it be. There were bigger problems right now than to wonder if ones own mother was moving on from their dead father.
The street lights were just turning on as she pressed the button to open the garage to park. His mustang was still in the garage, it was as if he was still here. Probably inside making him a sandwich or working out in the basement, Nathan had really taken a liking to that every since dad died. I didn't blame him though, everybody copes differently. For me, I found comfort in my games, it was like being able to step out of the real world and all of its problems that were attached and stepping into the world of fiction and creativity. Where you were able to control the outcome and not have to worry about getting hurt, dying, losing everything. Where there was all pleasure and no risk you have to take.
Mom shut the car off and opened her door, I followed behind her as we entered the empty house that was once a full home with love and laughter. Even if we found Nathan and he came back home, dad was still gone and that was never going to change.
I instantly slid out of my shoes and pealed my soaked socks off from my feet. Mom walked right over to the fridge and opened the right door, pulling out a bottle of red wine out. She only ever drank red wine when she was either in a good mood or content. She saved the white wine for long and stressful days and or when she was moody. She also kept her vodka in the freezer for when it was really bad. I hadn't seen her drink that though since her sister died last summer. Not even when dad died, she kept to the white wine fore months after him.
"I'm going to order some food. What are you in the mood for?" Mom asks.
"I'm good with whatever mom. You know what I like, order for me will you? I need to go take a shower and get out of these clothes." I say.
"Alrighty, I'm thinking pasta. Let's just do Olive Garden then." She says and pulls her phone out to call.
I leave my shoes and socks by the door where I took them off and walked down the hall to the stairs. Before turning and walking up the stairs, I noticed a light or something flickering in the sitting room to the side. There was a wall of books to the left, the grand piano was in the middle that dad used to play, and the huge bay window to the right that overlooked the front and side porch.
There it was again!
I ran up to the window and looked out... All I could see was our side yard and the tree line. Off to the far tree line of the yard, something glimmered again. How could something that far shine into our house?
It seemed to be something small and silver, possibly a ring. I couldn't really tell though, the dark liked to play tricks on your mind. The sound of the garage door opening in the distant causes me to shutter. Mom's car is backing out of the garage, leaving me at the house alone. That lighted flickered again, only lasting a second. Something told me to go check it out.
Ugh...
I forced myself to turn and walk to the front door to unlock it. Oh well... lets go. I stepped out onto the front porch and walked down the steps onto the concrete sidewalk. I stepped to the left and into the grass to walk down to the edge of the yard. The sound of cicadas were loud, I couldn't hardly hear myself think. Plus the mosquitos were out for vengeance, I already had three bites on my arm and legs.
There!
I could see the little glimmer of light again and knew I was close. The farther away I got from the house down to the tree line, the bright moon disappeared; blocked by the thick line of trees around me. I stopped in the spot where I thought the light was coming from and turned to look back at the house. Yup... This should be the spot where I saw it. Nothing was here anymore.
Just as I was about to give up, I saw something next to this tree that was hidden in the shadows. That's when the whispering begun, I leaned down and used the tree as balance as I crouched. It was that shiny thing I was seeing from the house. Slowly reaching for it, I closed around the strange object. Instantly, the blood in my body froze over, something didn't feel right. Before, the whispering was like at the back of my head, almost as if it were my own thoughts talking to each other. Now, the whispering felt like it was around me.
Wait...not around me. In front of me.
It dawned on me and I looked up to see a misshaped face staring back at me with hollow eyes. I swear it looked like its face was melting off or something, I couldn't describe it any other way. Something grabbed my hand and yanked on me, pulling me into the woods. Into the pitch darkness.
"Help me..." The whispering voice said, mutating into this low growl.
"HELP ME!" It said again, chilling me to the bone.
There wasn't even any time to scream, everything happened merely in seconds. With all my force and strength, I used the tree to my advantage as I pushed backwards. My hand still clasping the silver object. The next thing I know, the feeling of squeezing a water balloon to pop it, happened and I fell backward. I landed on my butt and scrambled back away from the total darkness. Two huge red eyes stared upon my soul as I pushed myself backwards trying to get to my feet.
The next thing I knew, I was sprinting up the yard and back to the front door, slamming it shut behind me and locking it. My heart was pounding, my body physically shaking from pure fear. What the hell was that?
I looked down and noticed my fist still balled up in a fist. Slowly, I release the muscles in my hand and see a small silver ring staring back at me. Everything came at me at once as I tried to draw conclusions. My mind going as fast as it could, but in every direction, making me motion sick. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried rubbing my temples to help stop the feeling and found myself trying to walk up the stairs. To my surprise, I ended up in my room in front of my computer desk, leaning for support. You just need to take a bath and relax Sampson, I tell myself. A hot bath actually sound really nice right now. It's settled then...
I pulled out some underwear and sleep pants and an old cut off t-shirt before walking over to the bathroom. I locked the door behind me and turned the water on hot to let it begin filling up. Luckily, we had freaking fast water pressure and the tub was filled in a couple of minutes. I peeled out of my nasty clothes and stepped into the soothing water. I leaned my head back and rubbed the ring around in my palm with my finger and thumb; never letting it go since I got it. What did the ring mean? What did any of it mean?
I let myself slide down the tub submerging my head completely and holding my breathe. I stared up at the ceiling through the water and just listened. It was peaceful, like I was in my own little world by myself.
Just saying that filled my mind with sour thoughts. Nathan... Nathan was alone right now, and he needed help. I didn't know what to do. Being under the water seemed easier. Easier than worrying about my brother...about what's going to happen... what the future even holds... It's just easier this way.
Pull yourself together! This life isn't here to be handed to you at a platter. You must take what's given to you. Nothing more, nothing less. We're not promised tomorrow, we're not promised fulfillment... but we have a gift. We have memories to hold on to, to remember. It's just like watching the days turn into weeks, months, and years. It's inevitable but we must live with it. You can't change the past, but you can work on the present. You must chose how you want to do it.. Are you going to give up? Are you going to quit? Life if full of moments where choosing what to do becomes a dire need.
Don't give up...
I held my breath a few more moments until they burned and begged for air before coming back up. My eyes following the pattern on the wallpaper in the bathroom. The water had long cooled off leaving me in a cold pool of water. I pulled the drain and watched as the water slowly drained, disappearing down the dark pipes of the house. I pushed myself up from the tub and stepped onto the bath mat in front of the mirror. The ring was still in my hand, I placed it on the counter and used the towel next to it to begin drying off with. I didn't even try with my hair, I was too tired and really just wanted to sleep.
I slipped the ring into my pocket and scooted my clothes over to the wall to mess with later and opened the door. The house was silent... all but the sound of something tapping glass. My heart stopped beating for a second until it dawned on me. It was mom downstairs eating dinner, she must have gotten back and started without me. Hearing her eating alone, made me feel bad. I walked down the stairs quickly and down the hall and into the kitchen where she was sitting at the island eating alone. This time, she had a glass of white wine next to her. The little blip of happiness must have depleted already.
"Hey mom." I say.
She smiled with a mouth full of pasta and pointed at the box with my food in it. The smell of it, made my stomach growl. I didn't realize how hungry I actually was. I thanked mom for going to get it and gabbed a fork from the drawer. There wasn't too much talk while we ate. Mom asked how I was feeling and blah blah blah. I sort of felt myself go on auto pilot and sat there eating and answering her with simple words.
Yes... uh huh... no... I'm good..
"Mom...you keep asking me if I"m okay... Are you okay?" I asked.
I didn't know how mom really was. I knew she was trying to stay together to keep our family together and to keep her business running.
"Baby, I don't know yet. I'm just trying to get through each day right now." She says after a moment of thinking.
"I know what you mean mom. Today was the first time in months you had drank any wine beside your white. You seemed happy while you were with Justin today." I blurted out before I could even stop myself, my mind was exhausted.
"What do you mean?" Mom asked carefully, like she knew what I was about to ask.
"Mom... Were you unhappy with dad or us? Are you unhappy?" I ask, released to get that off of my chest.
Mom sat there for a minute and finished the rest of her glass before looking at me. I know she knows that I found her notebook and the book she kept in her desk.
"Baby...I love you kids so SO much. You are my world. Your father and I, I really did love him with all of my heart. It's just that... life got away from us and I guess I just gave up. I lost myself for a long time. Now for Justin, he was my best friend in high school. He's still my best friend, so being with him helped me see the good in me again and remembered to be happy again." She says.
"How long has this been going on?" I ask, making sure not to sound angry or hurt.
"Since about February I believe. It started off with him just being there for me and just supporting me as I dealt with being a wi... a widow. But the thing was, I was there for him just as much as he and Karen were struggling with finance. Karen was close to remission but had recently been diagnosed again with a stronger more aggressive cancer. Nothing really hasn't happened though, I promise." She says.
"Mom, firstly, it's not a big deal to me. I just want you to be happy. You deserve to be happy. Second, what does this mean?" I ask.
"Honestly Sammy, I don't know. I would like for it to mean something. But he's got to have time to be able to greave his wife. I know I did..." She says.
She opens her arms for me to hug her and I take up the offer. She was warm and being in her arms felt safe, comforting. Like everything was going to be okay. I didn't know what the future held for me... for us, but there must be a future. We just had to wait for it to come.
I tossed the rest of my food into the trash and placed my fork in the sink before stretching and yawning. Mom placed the rest of her food in the fridge and dropped her fork into the sink too. I'm glad I was able to get that off of my chest, it was nagging at me at the back of my head. Like a splinter getting ready to cause an infection if not extracted any sooner.
"Mom, I think I'm going to head up to bed. Thanks for talking to me about this. I love you." I say and give her a hug.
"You're welcome Sammy... thanks for understanding. Goodnight, I love you." She says.
I tuned my head back and smiled one last time before leaving the kitchen and walking back to the stairs. Back to where my room was, my own bed. I walked up the stairs sluggishly and barely made it to my room and onto my bed before crashing. Lights out, instantly.
In my dream, we were all at the dining table eating breakfast. Casey wasn't there, but she didn't live with us. I remember this breakfast. It was the last one we ever had with dad before he went on his trip and never came back. This was a fond memory I had, it was just perfect.
I looked at dad and back at Nathan before taking a huge bite from my chocolate chip pancake. It tasted like literal heaven on earth. I looked back over at dad to see his face again but he was gone. His chair empty... I shook my head in denial, and closed my eyes. To my surprise, when opening them back was to see dad's place replaced with someone else. Not just anybody... Justin. I looked over to mom who was smiling away, obviously in love. I looked in front of me and Nathan smiled at me with a mouthful of pancake. Jaxon and his sisters were also sitting at the table now, along with Casey and her husband. It was one big and blended family. I looked around the table and back to Nathan again, who was now stabbing at something on the table.
He wasn't just stabbing at something, he was carving something into the wood. Literally a second later, he disappeared from us. Like he just vaporized into thin air. Nathan! I called out in my dream. Nobody at the table seemed to hear me though, or they just didn't bother. I jumped up from my seat and practically leaped across the table to read what Nathan Had wrote. Etched into the wood right next to his plate of partially eaten pancake was two words.
Help Me...