when i kissed the teacher・2

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unfortunately i have to go to school tomorrow. luckily though, as miss park's class is my last today, i have some time to mentally prepare herself to see her. lisa sticks by my side all morning when she can, trying to cheer me up, and by the time miss park's class rolls around, i don't feel as upset anymore.

i am absolutely terrified to step into the classroom, though. i sit right at the front of the room and therefore can't hide from miss park at all during the seventy minute long class.

"you've got this, girl," lisa says, massaging my shoulders as we stand opposite the door.

"i've got this," i agree. i can do this, miss park does not have that strong of a hold on me. she doesn't control me. i walk into the classroom with my head held high but the second my eyes meet miss park's, i stumble and drop my eyes to the floor in embarrassment. of course my desk is the one closest to miss park's own so the second i sit down in it, i slide my headphones in so she can't try and talk to me.

i make it until the class starts without any interruption but the second i take my headphones out, miss park approaches me. she has a stern look on her face and i have to physically stop myself from cringing back into my chair at the sight of it.

miss (y/l/n), i need you to stay after class today," she says quietly.

"why?" i ask defiantly.

"we'll discuss it later. just wait at your desk when the bell rings."

she walks away without another word and i'm left to spend the entire class dreading it ending.

once the bell rings and the other students have left, miss park closes the door and walks over to sit in the desk beside me.

"okay, i'm going to talk and you're going to listen unless i ask you a question, okay?" she waits for me to agree and when i nods, she continues. "i'm sorry for how i talked to you yesterday but what you did caught me off guard. i shouldn't have been so rude, i'll admit, and i felt awful when you started to cry. i didn't mean to make you so upset. but you understand why i reacted that way, right?"

"yes, miss."

"what you did was wrong. if  you had told me about your feelings with words, i would have reacted differently. obviously it's not your fault you feel the way you do and i don't blame you for it, but you're still my student for the next two weeks. this shouldn't happen again. do you understand?"

"yes, miss."

"good. now, is there anything you want to say to me?"

i almost shake my head but decide that yes, there is.

"i'm sorry for kissing you, miss park," i say, wringing her hands together nervously. "i freaked out because i'm just not very good at expressing my feelings. i know i seem super confident all the time and sure i may flirt with a lot of guys and girls, but i've never had real feelings for someone. i don't know why it's you that i like, i understand why i shouldn't, but... well, i just do. i'm going to try and stop, don't worry. i'm sure that once i've graduated i'll forget about you."

i notice something on miss park's face shift at those words but she quickly manages to school her expression and nod. it was a very slight slip-up though so i brush it off as nothing.

"okay," she says. she moves to stand up but after a second of hesitation, she sits back down. "what was wrong with you yesterday? why were you so red and hot?"

i almost forgot that entire morning happened and i freeze at being reminded of it. i'd hoped miss park wouldn't bring it up again and i'd never have to tell her.

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