park chaeyoung imagines | gxg

hurt

request from @asddewa

the past few weeks since mine and chaeyoung's relationship was released to the public have been hectic. we haven't been out of our apartment much since then and for the most part have been staying off social media to avoid any possible backlash. however, when i wake up one morning i find myself going straight onto instagram just to see what's being said about me. i've never been very good when it comes to curiosity and needing to know what people are saying about me.

clicking on one of my most recent pictures on instagram, i'm not surprised to see quite a bit of hate. i am, however, a little shocked to see some really nice comments also coming in. it makes me so happy to see those few sweet messages that i don't even care what the mean ones are saying. i can't let what they're saying bother me, i know it's just out of jealousy and they most likely don't mean anything they're saying. they'll get over it eventually anyway.

when chaeyoung wakes up about half an hour after me, i show her the nice comments, expecting her to be happy like i am, but instead her face drops and she looks really upset.

"what's wrong, chae?" i ask.

realizing that i've caught onto her expression change, she quickly forces a smile on her face. "nothing."

"yeah, like i believe that," i scoff. "something is obviously wrong. tell me."

"i promise it's nothing, babe," she says, and before i can argue again, she places a quick kiss on my lips before jumping out of bed and leaving the room. i almost considered following her and confronting her but figured she would come to me if she wanted to so i let it slide for the minute. i'm sure she just remembered something that she can't tell me about yet.

luckily when she comes back into the bedroom with two cups of coffee she looks a little more upbeat.

"hey, how about we start going to the gym again?" she suggests as she hands me my cup.

"what? why? we hate going to the gym," i say.

"i think it would be a good idea for us to get back in better shape."

i look her up and down, eyebrows raised to point out that she is in perfect shape, and she sighs.

"fine, i was trying to be nice by suggesting i go too but i think you should go back to the gym," she says. that takes me aback for a second then hurt begins to settle in my gut.

"why all of a sudden? i thought you liked how i look," i say.

"i do," she says, but i don't believe her. "i just think that now that we're in a public relationship you should work on your appearance a little more. like working out, putting more makeup on, stuff like that."

the more she speaks the more hurt i get but she doesn't seem to be catching on.

"so you're embarrassed to be seen with me now?" i ask. her eyes widen as she realizes what she was hinting at and immediately tries to backtrack.

"no, that's not what i mean at all! i'm just saying that because we'll have more attention on us now that you have to look good at all times. you don't want anything that the fans will criticize and say mean things about you for."

"i don't care what your fans say about me because i know you love me for me. or at least i thought you did."

without letting her say anything else i get out of bed and grab my coat from the door hanger.

"(y/n), wait," she calls after me.

"i'm going to stay with my brother for a bit, don't talk to me until you get your priorities in check."

i leave the apartment without another word and drive straight to my brother's house, ignoring the messages and calls popping up on my phone from chaeyoung. i'm not in the mood to listen to her lame excuses. what she said, despite whether she meant it the way she did or not, really hurt and i'm not going to pretend it didn't. i never imagined she could say something so heartless to me, especially because she knows the struggle i've had with my weight in the past. there's really no excuse for her saying what she did other than caring more about what the media says about her than about me. maybe she feels bad but if that's the case she needs to come to me and apologize to my face, and mean it.

i'm at my brother's house until the next morning when chaeyoung finally shows up. after thinking over the situation all through the night i'm not as angry or upset anymore, just still a little annoyed. i am willing to hear her out though so i let her into the guest bedroom so we can talk. as soon as we sit down, chaeyoung takes one of my hands and pulls it onto her lap.

"i'm so sorry, (y/n)," she says, tears already forming in her eyes. "i'm not going to give some bullshit excuse that i 'didn't mean what i said' or 'it just came out wrong' because i know that's not believable. i'll just say that what i said was awful and i am so sorry for it. i love you with my entire heart and i swear on my life that i do not care about your appearance. the only reason i said what i did is because i know firsthand how horrible the 'fans' can be. the girls and i have had to deal with negative comments on our bodies and appearances since we debuted and i don't want that to happen to you because i love you so much. but still, i shouldn't have said those things, especially because of your past body issues. i don't know if you can forgive me but just know that you mean the world to me and i don't want you to change any part of yourself to please people who aren't even true fans. i love you way more than i care about them."

she has a couple of tears running down her cheeks by the time she's finished so i silently reach up and wipe them away with my thumb, smiling gently when she leans into the touch.

"thank you for coming to apologize," i say. "i understand why you said what you did, i truly do, but it still hurt me a lot. i didn't think you'd say something like that to me so i was taken aback. i know that you're sorry and i forgive you. just please don't say something like that again. i honestly don't care what everyone says about me because all i care about is what you think of me. i want to spend the rest of my life with you so i'm willing to deal with those fake fans as long as i get to have you. i love you."

the smile that chaeyoung gives me is absolutely blinding and i am barely able to smile back before she leans in to kiss me.

"thank you, i promise i'll be better to you in the future," she whispers.

"you're great to me already," i tell her. "we just have to communicate better."

chaeyoung nods in agreement then kisses me again. i sigh happily into the kiss, glad that we were able to talk things out, and relieved knowing we won't go through something like this again. i meant what i said, chaeyoung is the only thing that matters to me and i can't wait to spend the rest of my life with her.

sorry this took so long, hope you liked it!!