Don't Hurt Me

Chapter 35

It had to happen sooner or later.

A few days after I talk to Rob, I'm at school, in the bathroom, when she comes in. Erin.

It's lunchtime, so we're not the only ones there, but as soon as she sees my face in the mirror, she freezes up. She and I stare at each other in the glass, wide-eyed. Neither of us knows what to do. Neither of us wants to make a move.

Finally, Erin whirls, bolting back out the door. I find myself going after her. "Erin!" I call as I push my way out of the bathroom. When I call her name a second time, she stops, standing rooted. I stare at the back of her thick, fake blonde hair, hesitating.

I should say something. I should say sorry for shouting at her that time because she was trying to set me up. It feels harder than I thought it would be.

I watch as she turns around to look at me. "Erin, I, uh …. " I cough, scratching my hair. "I'm sorry."

Her brows lift a little, but she doesn't answer me.

"I'll understand if you don't forgive me or whatever, but I really am sorry about … you know. I shouldn't have yelled at you."

For a long time, I'm not sure if she accepts my apology. Then she sighs heavily. "No, Clare. I'm sorry. I deserved it. I was being my stupid, pushy self. I should have backed off."

We both fall into an awkward pause, shuffling our feet. "So are we OK?" I ask.

"Yeah. I think so."

"OK. Good."

"Good." She shrugs her shoulders. "I, uh, haven't seen you in a while. Have things been OK with you?"

"Well, I missed some school. You know, sick and stuff."

"Really? Josh was sick some time ago too. Flu or something. He wouldn't even let me come over to see him. He was so afraid I'd get it."

"Oh, must have been flu season."

"Maybe we should go out and do something. I feel like it's been so long since we last talked."

"Thanks, but no thanks. I'm super busy these days."

"Oh. OK then. Some other time, maybe."

"Sure. Well, I should go. I need to get to my locker. I'll catch you later, OK?"

"Sure."

I smile at her before taking off. Erin's not someone I'd want to be my best friend, whether or not she's Josh's girlfriend. But I couldn't just leave things the way they were between us. That wouldn't have been right.

The rest of the day flits by like every other. I get two tests back, one a D, the other an F. Even before the situation of the Conroys began spinning out of control, I didn't care much about school. At this point, my grades are nothing but letters on papers I wrote but can't remember. The teacher's condescending looks and disappointed voices are a drone. The kids around me fade into a blur of faces.

Why bother? If it comes down to me and Rob having to move to Callville, I'll never have to see any of these people again.

After classes, I trot out with my head down to meet Alex and wait for her mother to pick us up. That's when I catch sight of a figure rushing towards me. At first, I think it might be Josh, but then I spot the hair – straight and dark blond like mine.

"Sam – " I manage to get out, before he grabs my arm and yanks me aside, away from the rest of the crowd. He takes me behind a tree, where I pull free of his grip. "What the hell is wrong with you?"