The Stars Will Catch Me

Chapter 30

Thinking of what to pack for 'boarding school' is difficult. The list of things I can't take is extensive and it makes me wonder what is acceptable. It's not likely that I'm actually going to use any of the items. It's all just for show - as if we don't all know what's really going on. 

My rolling bag is stuffed with clothing that I wouldn't mind dying in. My striped collared tee with the embroidered flowers on the chest, my mid-rise jeans that are acid washed, and a baseball hoodie I literally stole from Charlie's wardrobe when I was waiting for him to get ready for a concert. 

I purposefully take my time folding and organizing the clothing. I know that the second I am done packing my parents are going to high tail me out of here. They haven't so much as said a word to me since we got home last night. It's like we're all over the formalities. They know I know they never cared and I know they know I am not torn up about it. Like Charlie said, they choose to do wrong over and over again. At some point, I have to stop asking why and stop waiting for them to change. 

My brain is on autopilot as we drive down to the docks. It's like I'm standing still on a conveyor belt. Not a single complex thought crosses my mind as I stare at the blurring scenery outside the window. 

My mother's phone rings in her purse. She pulls it out, her eyebrow creases wrinkling at the screen. "It's Brendan." 

She says it to my father but I'm paying attention now. 

"Aren't you going to answer it?" he snaps at her. He rolls his eyes as he turns the steering wheel. "That's what you do when the phone rings, darling." 

Darling. It makes me miss Aaron. I hate how it sounds when my father says it. It shouldn't be used with so much contempt. 

"Everything's always a big issue with you, Ken. I blink and you find a way to make me feel stupid for it." 

"It's not that hard to do, dear." 

Answer the phone! I want to scream. 

She scoffs. "You're one to talk. I think I'd take a good look in the mirror before calling anyone else stupid." She doesn't give him time to reply as she taps the icon on her phone. "Hello?" 

The car's AC is too loud for me to hear Brendan's voice on the other side. I'm left to watch my mother's face twist and contort dramatically. 

"She's not picking up because we took her phone away. She's grounded." 

He's asking for me? 

"I can't put her on the phone. She's not with me." My mother's eyes dart to the rearview mirror and land on me. They are a warning to keep quiet. 

"I don't know. The boarding school is strict on outside communication." 

Brendan wants to speak to me. 

"She left this morning . . . Why would I have thought to tell you? You never seemed interested in her whereabouts before . . . Yes, well, she's our daughter, not yours."

My father is pulling up to the parking lot across the street from the docks. "Hang up. You can call him back later." 

I bite my lip. Brendan getting involved ruins the plan and ruins him. It's better for him not to ask so many questions. It's not like he can help though a selfish part of me likes the idea of him trying. 

"I'm very busy, Brendan. Goodbye." She cuts him off just like that, dropping her phone in her purse after placing it on silent. 

"He was asking about me?"