~ In Case Forever Ends Tomorrow ~ A Good Omens Fanfic

11 - I Promise You

~ Aziraphale's Perspective ~

Aziraphale was sitting on the floor, stroking Crowley's spiky red hair with his hand and brushing the demon's cheek with the other. His fingers ran over Crowley's smooth skin, holding his head against his chest. Aziraphale wished he could do this all the time. He wished he could hold and comfort Crowley whenever he was upset.

He wished - he hoped - that Crowley felt the same.

The angel, however, banished all those hopes. He knew Crowley could never love him. Never. He was a demon, and demons could not love anyone or anything. Aziraphale could still wish. He could still keep Crowley safe, even if the demon's love was out of question. Crowley's hand slid to Aziraphale's, and he twined their fingers together.

"Angel, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." Crowley whispered, his voice barely audible. Aziraphale's heart sank at the sadness in the demon's voice. The angel pressed Crowley closer to him, wrapping the demon in his embrace.

"I forgive you." Aziraphale assured him, "I will always forgive you."

"You're not supposed to," Crowley said quietly, "None of this is supposed to be happening. Nothing between us."

"I know," Aziraphale sighed, "But... I... I don't know."
"If you don't want to risk your life and status, I understand." Crowley said sympathetically, though his voice was soaked in grief.

"No!" Aziraphale said quickly, "I mean... I... I want to be your friend, Crowley."

"I want to be yours too, Angel." The demon said, the sincerity in his voice making Aziraphale's heart swell. He let Crowley rest his head on his chest, watching as he closed his eyes.

"When Hell finds out..." Aziraphale lost the words and shook his head, "I can't have them hurt you."

"Forget about me, Angel."

"Never again." Aziraphale promised, "I did once, a long time ago, and there was nothing I could have done to get those memories back. And yet, I still found you. Again. And I found myself caring for the same soul all over again. It doesn't matter whether you were an angel, a demon or an aardvark. You would still be my best friend."

Crowley opened his mouth to say something, but no sounds came out. He had always had trouble expressing any sort of feelings. Aziraphale knew most demons did. He felt that glow, that one emotion that radiated off of Crowley like light did the sun. But the angel could not place his finger on it. But there was a lot of it, and it was always stronger than it had been the day before. It wasn't bad, and it was certainly a feeling the angel had sensed on others. Mostly humans, but some angels too.

Aziraphale looked down at Crowley, who was whimpering softly. Silent tears slid down his cheeks as the angel's touch, and Aziraphale stared in confusion.

"Oh, dearest..." Aziraphale tilted Crowley's chin up, "Don't cry..."

"...Angel..." Crowley sniffed, hugging the angel as tight as he could. Aziraphale crossed his legs, wiping away the demon's tears. His eyes were completely yellow, usually a sign of stress. Crowley's eyes were more and more yellow depending on how much he was trying to pass for human or how much stress he was under.

"Why are you upset?" Aziraphale asked, stroking Crowley's head, "Don't cry, please."

"I-I'm sorry," Crowley stuttered, "I-I don't want them to hurt y-you."

"Oh..." Aziraphale looked down at Crowley. He could feel his heart beating rapidly as he cried. It was then that Aziraphale came to the startling realisation of what he wanted to do. The angel wanted to whisper three words, three short words to Crowley over and over until he fell asleep. He wanted to do more than just hold the demon.