~ In Case Forever Ends Tomorrow ~ A Good Omens Fanfic

5 - Do you Trust Me?

"... Crowley, wake up," He tried again.

"...Huh... Angel?" He asked, blinking awake and meeting Aziraphale's tearstained gaze.

"Oh, Angel," He whispered. His gaze flicked over to the sword that was posed to kill him. His eyes turned dark, the black slits in the yellow getting thinner.

"I'm sorry," Aziraphale sobbed, "I'm so, so sorry... I can't kill you, I don't want to hurt you..."

"You were going to kill me." Crowley said coldly, "While I was asleep. After you asked me if I trusted you. After you knew I would never question you."

"Crowley... I'm so sorry," The angel repeated the words over, and over, as if it would somehow make things better, "They promised me my old life back. They promised there would be no war!"

"Okay, okay," Crowley said soothingly, his cold eyes softening, "It's okay, you're okay, I'm okay, everything will be okay.... Just... Just give me the sword," He said, holding his hand out slowly. Aziraphale stared at it, knowing if he gave the demon the sword, all his chances would be lost. Crowley was probably just tempting him, manipulating him... Aziraphale didn't have the energy or the heart to say otherwise. So he handed the sword to Crowley.

"... Okay, good... it's okay, Angel, it's okay. Please stop crying,"

"They said the war would never come if I..."

"They lied, Angel. They lied."

"How could Heaven lie?" Aziraphale asked, his voice cracking, "You're supposed to be the one lying!"

"I'm not lying to you, Angel. Would I lie to you?" He asked, and Aziraphale recalled him asking the very same question before they saved the world.

"I don't know," Aziraphale admitted.

"Please don't ever think that," Crowley begged, "Don't ever think that. Aziraphale, listen to me. I would never, ever think of lying to you."

"I lied to you," Aziraphale cried quietly, "I lied to your face the whole day and I'm supposed to be an angel! I'm not a good angel... I'm not a good anything."

Crowley looked at Aziraphale, his eyes filled with sadness.

"You're my best friend. You're good at that - no, you're the best at that."

Crowley smiled at Aziraphale, whose eyes widened as the demon hugged him. Crowley stayed there for a while, and Aziraphale hugged him back.

The angel wanted to tell Crowley that he loved him. He wanted to whisper the words so only he could hear, over and over, until the demon felt loved. But Aziraphale could not love him. It would cause a war.

It would hurt Crowley.

Please, God... Please don't let the war hurt him, Please keep him safe. I'm sorry I've failed you. I couldn't kill him. I'm sorry...

Aziraphale knew his prayers would go unanswered. But to him, it was still worth a shot. Anything was worth trying if it was for Crowley.

Aziraphale nestled himself into Crowley's chest, promising himself it was just this once. Promising Heaven and Hell that it would never happen again. An angel and a demon could not be together. They couldn't be in love, and they could not be friends.

One last time, Aziraphale prayed, I just want to make him smile one last time.

"Thank you, Crowley," Aziraphale whispered, "Thank you so, so much."

"Can we go to sleep now?" Crowley asked, "You know, so long as I'm not going to wake up with a sword in my back?"

Aziraphale knew he meant to be funny, but the angel was in no mood to laugh. He simply leaned against Crowley's shoulder, feeling safe and protected under the demon's watch. Crowley brushed his hand over Aziraphale's by accident. He didn't seem to notice, and if he did, he made no comment. He just sat there with the angel, the look in his yellow eyes telling him that that the demon would sit awake for as long as Aziraphale needed him to.