Broken and Abused

Chapter 114

"Ram, I—"

"No! You've been teasing him and-and bullying him for years now! Just because he's weaker than you! He's your boyfriend, you should be caring, not manipulative, you practically roped us into this shi-"

"ENOUGH!!! Okay?! I'm sorry, is that what you wanted?!" Roman asked coldly.

Ram's eyes were filled with hatred, "You're sorry?! Well thank-fking-you!! But sorry won't bring back our normal lives, sorry won't get rid of Kurt's cutting, or-or the rope burn around his neck! God, I love him so much!! And-oh my god, look at us talking about him like he's not even here!"

Ram helped Kurt up. He was drained physically and emotionally from the attempt.

"Roman..i'll talk later" he said coldly, walking off.

Roman rolled his eyes, stomping off.

Remus wondered why Roman was in such a bad mood that night, in fact, he was in such a bad mood, that he ended up smacking Remus across the face hard enough to leave a mark.

"You're so damn annoying, Remus! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!"

——Flash-forward brought to you by Roman's redemption arc that might only be possible in your dreams——

Roman sighed, thinking of the memory. How could he have been such..a jerk? Especially to his best friend, who he knew was suicidal? Even if that happened almost three years ago, it still made him feel a bit guilty.

He didn't even know where they were now, but he couldn't help but think about how awful he was. Ram said he wouldn't fall for Roman's tricks again, but he did. He came right back into his arms, and under his influence, helped bully many other kids.

Roman grabbed a knife out of the kitchens knife block. Kurt always said that it made him feel better to cut. It took the pain away for a while, and distracted him.

He'd rather have physical pain, than the burden of this emotional pain.

He brought the cool metal object to his wrist.

He took a deep breath, and-

"Roman?" Remus questioned quietly. He'd heard noises and came into the kitchen, where Roman was, a sharp steak knife in his hand, pointed towards his wrist, milliseconds away from dragging across his pulsing veins.

Remus quickly ran over, and snatched the knife, disbelief clouding in his eyes, "no-n-nn-no! HELL NO! You don't get to do this-you-god, after everything you've done! You think you-christ, no, you don't get to feel the emotional pain great enough to need to cut yourself, damn it!"

"Remus, wait, I-"

"No!" Remus cut him off, anger flaring inside of him, "hell no, do you know what you put us through? Me? Virgil? Everyone?! Every single day, I missed you, I waited for you, and I hoped you'd come home-to play, or hang out or something! But no, you always left me behind, teased me, acted disgusted every time you looked at me!"

Roman opened his mouth to say something, only to be cut off by a voice crack, "i'm constantly trying to feel pain so I don't feel nothing! I'm so used to being alone by now!"Remus pulled up his sleeves, revealing deep, jagged cuts, and long scratch marks, "do you know what I have to do to feel like i'm a person?! I have to stab myself!"

"Remus.." Roman whispered in horror, looking at the marks.

Remus snorted, "funny how you care now that something's wrong!-Oh, sorry, funny how you pretend to care!"

"Even through all the horrible crap you've done, everybody always loved you. Mr. Popular! Friends around every corner, and what was I left with?! I was left with whispers and laughs! Don't think that I don't know what you told everyone!! You told everyone disgusting lies about me-I had to get in trouble and act out for any attention! I had to fight my way to be even half as great as everyone believed you were!"

"And you know what?!" He continued, before Roman could even get a word in, "i'm so tired of this!"

Remus took the knife, jabbing it half-way into his stomach, then taking it out, and stabbing himself again.

Remus's eyes rolled to the black of his head as black tears rolled down his face, "is this what you wanted?"

Suddenly, Roman woke up, shooting up in his bed, screaming, thrashing, and sobbing. He put a hand over his mouth to stifle his screams.

Oh thank god-it was just a dream-a nightmare-the flashback was very real, though.

Roman cried though, the message behind the dream was real. He had bullied Remus relentlessly in school, and made fun of him in front of his friends. He told his friends embarrassing secrets about Remus too, and twisted the truth.

He tried to turn people against Remus, because Roman didn't want to be a bread roll to hold you over before dinner. He didn't want to be scrapped left-overs that nobody wanted to save.

Yet, all those years, he knew that's how Remus felt.

And he. did. nothing.

Remus burst through the door, hearing the screams and cries. "Ro, are you okay?!"

'Ro..' He thought, 'haven't heard that one in a while..'

Roman thought, 'I don't deserve the right to feel okay.

"R-Remus, t-take off your shirt" he gasped out.

Remus raised a brow, "Okay, despite what you've probably heard from Andrew, incest is not wincest-"

"Remus, i'm serious!" Roman sobbed, burying his face in his hands.

So, Remus quickly obeyed, realizing the seriousness in Roman's voice, taking his shirt off, trying to lighten the tension by doing it slowly in almost a sexual manner, as Roman turned on the lamp next to his bed.

Roman sighed in relief. No stab wound. No cuts.(Well, no cuts that hadn't already been healed by then. But Roman didn't need to know about that.)

So Roman, who had slept without a shirt on, quickly got up to hug Remus, who hugged back after a few seconds of being shocked.

"Boys, what is the screaming about?!" Katlin asked, running in. She saw them both without shirts on, and widened her eyes, "are you...?"

"Mom, no! We aren't having sex!" Roman said quickly, pulling away.

"No, no, let her think what she wants. Maybe we could convince her to get in on some family fun one night" Remus smirked, wriggling his eyebrows.

"I mean, I know that you guys want to experiment and stuff because your bodies are changing-"

"MOM! We aren't sixteen, we're eighteen! Our bodies are already changed!'I had a nightmare and Remus is comforting me!" Roman quickly yelled.

"With your shirts off?"

"I-"

" 'Comforting' yeah, that's not what the kids called it back in my day" she smirked, "but in all seriousness-are you okay?"

"Yes" Roman lied without hesitation. He seemed to lie a lot.

A/n: Ya'll want some more angst? Because I can make up some Patton and Logan missing 'the old Roman' sub plots. 😂

OOOH I could also make up some angst with Virgil being made fun of for being related to a murderer.

At this point, i'm just trying to stall the ending of the story.

Maybe afterwards i'll write some oneshots. Or maybe a prequal that explains more about Andrew and Lucia's relationship, and what changed in Andrew.

Idk, if that's something ya'll would be interested, do tell.